My Little Flutty
by Nosfrat
Summary: Started out as a simple fluffy one-shot, continued into a multi-chapter adventure / war kind of thing... Read at your own risk. Self-insert (sort of), human in Equestria, light human x pony, hints of various other shippings throughout the story. Rated T for some frightening / intense situations, very light blood / war gore, violence, coarse language and some minor adult content.
1. Black Winter Night

_**A/N: My first attempt at a MLP fic, I'm not too familiar with this fandom (yet) so bear with me.  
This is basically me writing down what I wish could happen during my lengthy, solitary night walks.**_

* * *

3:30 AM.  
The streets are empty. I'm the only one crazy enough to be outside, especially without a reason.

I'm walking, hard rain pouring on me, my long hair matted against my back, my glasses all misty and covered in raindrops. I can barely see where I'm going, but it doesn't matter much to me. I've walked this path countless times...  
Or, maybe I went a little farther than I thought. I do not recall that bush, right there. That large bush, with what appears to be a few pink leaves on top of it. Wait, what? Pink leaves?

I stop walking, look around me, take off my glasses which I proceed to 'clean' using a small rag I keep in my (now drenched) pocket, and put them back on. That didn't work as intended, while I can see slightly better, the pink leaves are still here. I carefully walk towards them, though I can hardly see them anymore, hidden in the blurry mess my hazy glasses cause me to see. I reach for this small strand of pink, and touch it... As soon as my fingertips make contact with it, I feel recoil. Whatever that 'thing' is, it just reacted to my touch, and is now mostly hidden inside the bush itself. I could have sworn I heard a shriek, but then it's hard to gauge with Judas Priest blasting in your ears...  
Unsure of what to think (probably tiredness taking over), I make a U-turn and start heading back home.

After a few seconds, something moves behind me, casting a fast-moving shadow on the walls next to me, under the dim street lights. I turn my head back only to see... Nothing.  
Probably a cat or something, I thought to myself. A cat with a really long... What kind of cat has 'hair' trailing behind it as it takes off? Takes off? Okay, now, I know I'm really tired, but there are no such things as flying cats.

Probably an hallucination... After all, I couldn't sleep well lately.  
In fact, the last few days I couldn't sleep for more than a few hours. And right now, I'm awake since well over thirty hours. Hopefully this little walk will have worn me out enough to allow me to simply fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow...

I push the double glass doors, enter the building, climb the three flights of stairs, and enter my flat. I push my room's door open, and my jaw drops in awe. Both windows are wide open, strong gusts of wind blowing cold air and rain inside, soaking everything, including my computer, bed, and everything else that isn't at least ten feet away from the windows.

God. Damn. It.

Now I clearly don't remember having left my windows opened, especially since I -never- open them, but what the hell. I'm too tired for rational thinking. As I fight the cold water smashing against my face, I make my way to the windows and close them.

"Oh man, look at this mess! My computer and everything..."

I sit down on my bed, feeling worse than I did since like... at least one week. I'm completely drenched, and so is my bed. Everything is cold, there's no way I'll be able to sleep here for at least one hour. I turn the heater on, and sit on the floor, sighing hard. And then, something catches my attention. A yellow feather. A yellow feather, on the ground... Probably got blown inside because of the wind, but what kind of bird has yellow feathers? The only wild birds living around are here pigeons, crows and the likes. No weird-ass colorful tropical birds.

I suddenly hear a scream outside. This time, without metal blasting on my MP3 player, I'm really sure I heard it. Against my better judgement, I open the windows again, and after the initial blast of cold wind and water hitting me hard in the face, I see something. Something, yellow and pink, sitting on a tree branch.  
It's far too big to be a bird, and it's far too... Yellow and pink, to be anything I have ever heard of. Not knowing why in the first place, I still decide to call out.

"Hello? Do you... need some help?"

No answer. Well of course, whatever the fuck it is, it's not like it was gonna talk to me. What was I thinking? I really, really need some sleep. On my way to a probably pathetic attempt at hair-drying my bed, I hear another, time time very distinct, scream.

"Um... hel... he... HEEEEEEELP!"

I rush back to the window and see the yellow and pink creature waving a... limb, at me.

"What are... How can you... Nevermind, hold on!" I shout back, my heart starting to beat much faster than it should. I have no idea what's going on, and deep inside I'm pretty sure I'm lucid-dreaming or some other strange shit.  
Nevertheless, I grab a small ladder I keep for whenever I need to do things my five feet and nine inches won't allow me to do on my own, and race down the stairs.

Once in the street, I try to shield my face with my left arm as I carry the ladder in the other, walking towards the tree. It's a lot higher than I first thought, and even on top of the ladder with my arms extended above my head, I'm still a good four feet short of the branch. Time for heroic shit.

"Jump in my arms, I'll catch you!"

The creature looks at me, reluctantly getting up and trying to gauge whether or not it should trust me. Or at least I think it's looking at me, since I can't see shit, especially when looking up.

"Come on, jump! I promise I'll catch you!"

"Um... I..."

"Come on! You can do it!"

After a few seconds, it fully stands up, and extends its wings. Its wings?  
My thoughts were interrupted by the sight of the strange animal jumping from the branch, wings fully extended, and violently crashing against my chest, sending everything, including both of us and the ladder, crashing several feet below.  
I land on my (thankfully plump) ass, and before I could recover from the blow, the ladder crashes violently on the pavement, a couple of inches away from my head. Face pale with fear, I look at it and sigh. As I start trying to get up, something reminds me of what the fuck I was doing climbing trees in the middle of a stormy night.  
A large, colorful winged creature struggling to keep hovering above me, each flap of its wings sending torrents of raindrops in every direction. After a few seconds, it crashes on my stomach, and I gasp, both in pain and for air.

It takes me a few minutes to recover, but when I do, what my eyes are met with is something I wouldn't have imagined seeing in my wildest dreams.  
A yellow pegasus with a pink mane, rain dripping off its wings, its large dark green eyes full of worry and sadness looking into mine.

After a few seconds, I manage to speak. "F... Fluttershy?"

I hear a gasp, and then a timid voice asks. "How... How do you know my name?"

I try to regain my composure but seriously, holy shit, what the fuck is going on?

"Uh, you... Like... I mean, I... What are you doing here?" I manage to spit out.

"I... um... don't know. One of my friends was showing me some new magic tricks and some new, uh... spells and um, something went wrong, and I woke up here... Where am I?"

"Uh... You're on Earth."

"Earth? Is that a... region? Like, a distant, foreign place in Equestria?"

"Uh no, Earth is a planet. Equestria is uh... I don't know." I wasn't quite ready to tell her right off the bat that she was, along with her 'world', actually made-up cartoon stuff. But then, she was here, she was really real, right before my eyes.  
"Listen, it doesn't matter, what matters is, you're gonna get sick if you stay out there in the cold. Come with me."

She followed me, her tail low, never looking up. At least she wasn't hurt. My back was, but that's another story. After walking up the stairs again, I show her to my room and tell her to sit on the bed while I go fetch my hair-dryer. The bed itself is actually nearly dry by now, the heater having done its job.  
After carefully drying off every inch of her body, I sit down beside her.

"So... What were you doing in that tree?"

"I, um... was scared. I hid in a bush first, but then something came close to me, so I had to flee, and I couldn't fly normally because my wings were too heavy, with all this rain..."

"So you were stuck up there? Well, that... sucks."

Holy shit, is that all I can find to answer? Fluttershy appears in my world, I 'heroically' rescue her from a situation I was responsible for in the first place, and all I can find to say is that 'it sucked'?  
Damn.

But then we were starting to warm up, and we talked.  
We talked.

We talked for over an hour, about various things. I told her that I knew a few things about her 'world' but I wasn't gonna go into details.  
She told me a few things about hers, some I already knew, some that made me chuckle.  
We talked about our respective childhoods, we laughed together...

For the first time in years, I had someone to talk to. It felt so... relieving. I was almost feeling happy. At least I think that's what happiness would feel like.  
After a few minutes of silence, her gaze dropped to the ground.

"Do you think I'll ever be able to get back to where I belong?" she asked, tears forming in her eyes.

"I don't know, but I'll do everything I can to help you."

She tried to force a weak smile. "I'm... I'm scared..."

"I know, it's normal, but things are gonna be alright. I promise, I'll help you." I said calmly to her, gently stroking her pink mane.

"Now you should try to rest, get some sleep. Tomorrow we can start sorting this mess out."

"Um... Can I... Um..."

"Yes?"

"Um, like... Sleep on the bed? It's cold on the ground, and, um..."

"Of course you can, come here!" I said enthusiastically, patting the free spot next to me.  
She carefully laid down, her head inches away from mine. I gave her a soft peck on the forehead, and stroked her wings.

"Don't worry, I'd never let you sleep on the floor."

She looked at me and smiled, this time a genuine smile. She put her hoof on my cheek, caressing it softly.  
We looked into each other's eyes, the only sound being her soft breathing, lulling the both of us. We fell asleep within minutes, cuddled against each other. The warmth of her body was comforting and welcomed in this cold, black winter night.

* * *

The rays of the Sun were now shining through the curtains. I opened my eyes, still groggy, and reached for Fluttershy, only to feel... nothing.  
She was gone.

Oh God... This was just a dream. All of it... Fuck, fuckity fuck fuck FUCK.

Feeling a mix of emptiness, sadness, frustration and anger overtaking anything I could have been feeling at the moment, I rolled over and felt something brushing against my skin. I sat up and felt the bedsheets, trying to find what it was.  
I grabbed it, and unfolded it. It was a small piece of paper, blank. I looked at it, hoping that text would magically pop up or something, and sighed. As I was about to crumble it and throw it away, I felt a burning in my hand. Three small, pink butterflies had appeared on the paper. My head started to feel heavy and my vision grew blurry, when a thundering yet soothing voice rang into my ears.

"I am so sorry about the mistake my student made, which has caused you so much disagreement."

Holy shit, is that Celestia talking to me via telepathy? So it wasn't a dream?

"However, I am also glad about it, for her failed spell had a side effect that no one had ever believed could be possible. It opened a dimensional portal between our worlds, and after several hours of hard work, we have found a way to fully control it. On the request of my student's friend, Fluttershy, I will transport you to our world, should you want me to."

I was staring at nothing in particular, my face probably white as a sink, and expressionless, I was starting to shake my head in disbelief when I heard Fluttershy's voice.

"There are many things here in Equestria that I'm sure you would love... You can, um, come spend a few days here with us. With me... If that's okay with you, I mean."

Celestia's voice came back.

"If you let go off this paper, your memory will be entirely wiped out, and you will jump back in time to about 2:50 AM last night. Nothing strange will happen and you will have no memory of anything that has happened between this time, and right now. Should you choose to crush it in your fist, and clench it as hard as you can, you will faint and wake up in a few minutes, in my castle, with my student and her friend waiting for you, eager to show you the magic of many things that your world apparently lacks. However, I must inform you about something. Maintaining the portal open requires extreme amounts of energy. We kept it open all night for various tests, and while doing so allowed Equestria's laws of physics to linger in your world, I will have to close it as soon as possible, upon which your world will recover its regular... 'properties'. A minute in Equestria equals several days on Earth. Should you choose to come visit us for a few days, once you come back, several decades will have passed and there's no telling what will have happened during this time. Now, things are up to you."

After her voice stopped, and after I regained my composure, I looked at the paper, which was now glowing bright pink.  
I laughed at the fact I was even considering my options, and crushed the fuck out of it with both hands.

All I heard before fainting nearly instantly was a shy yet heartly "yay!".

* * *

**_A/N: While this is technically a one-shot, the potential for turning it into a multi-chapter fic seems quite high to me. Would you guys be interested in knowing what could happen next? Leave a review!_**


	2. Dawn Over A New World

_**A/N: Okay so, I decided to continue this story, mostly due to positive feedback, and also because I just felt like it, though I have no idea where it's going. Probably nowhere but eh. Enjoy!**_

Consciousness? Check.

Still human? Check.

Balls? Check.

Surroundings? Uh... Not quite check.

Where the fuck am I?  
Definitely not in Celestia's castle, and definitely not home. I sit up, and try to make up my surroundings. I see wood. Wood everywhere. Wooden walls, wooden floor, wooden ceiling... I'm actually sitting on a bed. Well, more like, a mattress on top of a wooden plank. I look at my hands, no sign of the paper. There doesn't seem to be a door or an exit anywhere in this circular room...  
This is rather unpleasant, I must say. I stand up, scratch my balls and hear muffled laughter.

"Where am I? Is anybody out there?"

Suddenly, a hole carves itself in the wall and a purple horn peeks into the room. I sigh with relief.

"I see you, Twilight."

She gasps, retracts her horn, and then enters the room after a few seconds.

"How do you... know my name?"

"As I told Fluttershy, I know quite a few things about y'all, but uh... I'd rather not explain this. At least not now."

"Oh... I'm sorry for having put you through so much disagreement, really."

"Nah, don't worry, it's cool. For once something happened in my life, and it was something pretty fucking awesome."

She recoils, looking startled. I take a step towards her.

"What's wrong?"

"Th... Those... Those words!"

I mentally facepalm. Right, all colorful ponies and shit, no swearing.

"Oh, yeah right, my bad. It's just, many people use these words all the time in my world."

"Oh my... It must be horrible..."

"Not really. When you hear them all the time for no reason, they lose most of their impact even when used with a reason. But I'll avoid saying such things here, or at least I'll try, I promise."

She smiles, and then looks around, trying to analyze me.

"What are you doing?"

"Well it's the first time I see a creature like you... A human, right?"

"Yep... I don't know what to say, I mean, where I live, there are ponies, though they look very different, and don't have any powers. But... Pegasi, unicorns, alicorns and all those creatures are mythology in my world, along with dragons, griffons and whatever other things you have living here. Speaking of my world... Holy sh- I mean, dam- I mean, well, I mean, like..."

Fucking shit, not swearing is harder than I thought.

"I mean, what's happening? Fluttershy warping through dimensions, finding herself near my home, I rescue her, I wake up and find this... paper. Then I hear Celestia's voice making me an offer I can't refuse, and here I am, in another dimension after clenching a piece of magic paper or whatever... Oh man, this is serious fu-... I mean, weird."

"Don't worry, you'll get used to living here. If you need anything I can take you to the Princess, she'll be happy to help you out. Also, from the infos I could gather on your world, you'll find that life is much, much more enjoyable here. It's mostly peaceful."

"Heh... I've never been one for peace. Probably because... Ah, whatever. Is Fluttershy here?"

"Yep, she's here. Being shy."

"Fluttershy?" I call out. She timidly enters the room. She instantly smiles upon seeing me. She trots towards me and nuzzles my thigh. I pat her on the head.

"I'm here. You must be happy to be back in Equestria, aren't you?"

"Oh, yes... Your world was so dark and unhappy."

"I know, right. Lived twenty-three years there... Though according to what Celestia said, in your world I'd have been born like, three days ago or so. This is all so strange."

Suddenly, Pinkie Pie. Popping out of nowhere, as usual.

"Pinkie, what are you doing here?" asks Twilight, annoyed.

"Well I heard there was someone new in town so, I need to throw him a party, here, I made some cupcakes for you and I-"

Twilight puts a hoof in her mouth and pushes her outside.

"Thanks Pinkie but uh, we'll holler back at you later. I think he's gonna need a little bit of time to adjust to even being here, your randomness is gonna freak him out."

"Oh no, don't worry, come in Pinkie, you can throw me a party if you want. And a cupcake, man I'm starving."

She happily throws me a cupcake, which I eat quickly, before even realizing that's the first time in my life I've ever eaten a cupcake.

"That was pretty awesome."

She jumps around and giggles, before landing on my shoulders. She's incredibly lightweight for her size. In fact much lighter than Fluttershy. She puts her hooves around my neck, earning a glare from her yellow friend.

"Oh you so gotta come to this party I'm gonna throw tonight, there'll be Applejack and Rarity and... Oh my God, you need to go see Rarity! You can't go dressed up like this! It's embarrassing! C'mon, she'll love designing something for you."

"Uh thanks Pinkie but uh, I'm gonna... Stay here. For now. You know, I just warped through time and space or whatever it took for me to get here, I'm kinda tired."

"Oh..." her smile drops and she jumps off me. "Well I hope to see you tonight! All of Ponyville is gonna be here, too!"

I never liked crowded areas, parties or anything... But maybe that was just my aversion to the human race, and I'll be fine with ponies. I swallow hard, and force a smile.

"I'll drop by, I promise."

She runs out of the room happily, jumping around as usual. I let out a small chuckle.

Twilight shakes her head in disbelief.

"You must really know things about us, because I've never seen someone able to withstand the first enconter with Pinkie."

Fluttershy is still frowning. "Hey Fluttershy, what's wrong?"

She looks at me and starts smiling. "Oh, nothing. Nothing, don't worry."

"Alright... Well uh, anyway, where am I?"

Twilight sits down next to me. "This is where the portal was created. We built a small wooden shack around it, so you wouldn't feel too... exposed, upon your arrival."

"Fucking spawnjails." I mutter to myself.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. So what now? What happens of me?"

"I guess you can live with us, do things with us and all. I'm not sure this is the way you humans would behave but, if you want to, we all could use your help for various things. Fluttershy said that you looked pretty lonely in your world so we thought you'd enjoy having some company and activities."

"Hmm... That sounds about right, I don't see how I could help you though, not having any powers or anything but, why not. It'll be good to have stuff to do."

Twilight's face drops.

"Oh..." she starts blushing.

"What? What's wrong?" I ask, suddenly feeling worried.

"I forgot to mention it because I thought it would be obvious when you were told about the different laws of physics and all but, here in Equestria, you actually have powers. Well, might have. You just gotta discover them. It could be anything, most likely telepathy or something like that though, as your body lacks wings, horns or anything that grants a natural ability."

Jesus this sounds like Pokémon or some shit. "How am I to discover my... powers?", it feels so weird even assuming I have powers. "I should just join the Cutie Mark Crusaders or something." I say ironically, though I realize it could almost be an idea.

Her face lightens up again. "That's the spirit! And we, too, can help you find your power! I wouldn't go to Dash because you'd be in a hospital within an hour, and I'm not too sure we could easily fix you up, but Fluttershy and I could totally help you!"

Now that's reassuring. They don't know human anatomy, if I get injured I'm fucked. I'm starting to think that maybe this wasn't such a great idea after all... But it beats my life on Earth so far.

"Alright... How did Fluttershy end up in my world by the way? I understood that you opened a portal and all but, why her? She doesn't seem like somepony who would volunteer for such a thing."

"That spell was originally meant to create a small wormhole between her cottage and Ponyville. But I messed something up. She was running after Angel for whatever reason, and she got caught in the area of effect... Instead of opening a wormhole, it created a strange flash of light, and a portal, something nopony had ever seen before. Both the portal and Fluttershy had disappeared by the time I could realize what had just happened. I immediately wrote to Princess Celestia who came to help me and we managed to find something about this whole thing, and cast another spell to recreate the portal, and this time it didn't disappear. We brought Fluttershy back, though she seemed a bit... Disappointed. She talked all night about how warm and comforting it was to sleep near someone."

The shy pegasus looked at me, blushing. I was probably blushing as well, though some fucked up thoughts were running through my mind, thoughts I was hoping Twilight couldn't read.

She continued. "After we brought her back we carried on several tests and experiments, and we realized that we could control this portal. On Fluttershy's request, we kept it open until you woke up, and talked to you. And there you are."

"Wow... Sh- I mean, wow. It's closed now, right?"

"Yes, it requires far too much energy to keep it open, and the interactions between both worlds might result in strange, troublesome things, if kept open for too long."

"I understand, not like I'd want to go back, though. At least not now."

"Let's go for a walk! I'm sure you're gonna enjoy the sights." the purple unicorn said happily.

For some reason I was thinking of red dots and chevrons but I brushed it off and followed the two ponies out of the house.

"Where am I going to stay?"

"Um..." Fluttershy started.

"Oh I know" Twilight said, "you can stay at Applejack's. Or my place, if Spike's okay with it."

Fluttershy was fiddling her wings. "Um... Twilight?"

"Or, we could build you a small shack, like this one but with furniture and-"

"Hey!" the yellow pegasus screamed, though it sounded more like a loud whisper.

"What, Fluttershy?"

"Maybe... He could stay with me? If, if that's okay with him, I mean."

She was blushing hard. Remembering the night before, those wicked thoughts filled my head once again and I found myself unable to answer anything. I simply nodded.  
Christ, I'm gonna bring doom upon this world if I keep thinking and behaving the way I did on Earth.

"Alrighty then, we should get ready for Pinkie's party. Knowing her she's already baking."

And now I'm hungry. Holy shit, this is gonna be one long day.


	3. Revelations

**_A/N: I'm starting to have a (very) rough idea of where this story is going. Not sure how often I'll be updating it but stay tuned for more._**  
**_Also, sorry for the poor vocabulary and potential grammar / language mistakes and all but I'm NOT a native English speaker and I learnt everything I know from movies, video games and the Internet so, yeah. Also with this story I'm trying out a more... Personal writing style. Something that should make the reader feel closer to the story, almost as if he were the one starring in it. Those greentext stories (flutterrape etc.) inspired me to do this, but I will NOT use the second person. Just no way._**  
**_ANYWAY enough of this pointless ranting, I present you, chapter 3. Also I'll be naming every chapter after a DragonForce song. Just because I want to._**

"So this is Sweet Apple Acres? It's smaller than it looked..."

"Smaller than it looked? Where on Equestria could you have ever seen it?"

"Really girls, I'll explain all of this later, I don't wanna ruin anything for now."

Twilight raised an eyebrow, but she let it go. She trotted towards a familiar orange earth pony, who greeter her with her trademark Southern enthusiasm.

"Howdy partner!"

"Hey Applejack! I want you to meet our new... friend."

"Why hello there, uh... What in tarnation is this... thing?"

I sighed, Twilight rolled her eyes and Fluttershy blushed.

"I ain't never seen nothin' like this before..."

I took a step forward and tried to look as friendly as possible, which was on the edge of impossibility for me.

"Hello, I'm... uh, a human. I'm a... Creature, I guess you could say, I'm from another dimension and I..."

Applejack's jaw dropped and her eyes widened. Way to go, clearly 'a creature from another dimension' sounds really reassuring... Holy shit I'm a moron sometimes. Twilight spoke.

"Hey, easy AJ, he's a friend. He doesn't want us no harm, he's the uncanny result of my missed spell last night."

"What happened?" she asked, eyeing me skeptically.

"We aren't really sure but my spell completely failed and opened a portal to his... world. Fluttershy got caught in the blast radius and she was sent there, where he found her and took care of her for a few hours. We then brought him to thank him and because..." She looked at Fluttershy, who seemed to be scared all of a sudden. "Well, anyway, he comes from a dark and dangerous place, so we thought he'd be happy to be here for a while."

I nod and laugh at that statement. "Yep, if anything I'd be safer living in the Everfree Forest..."

"Well as long as y'all don't hurt anypony, I guess we cool. Do you... like apples?"

"I sure do."

Fluttershy tugged Twilight's tail.

"What is it, Fluttershy?"

"Well, um.. I think, maybe, we should tell her about Pinkie's party? I mean, isn't that why we're here in the first place? And to introduce him to Applejack, of course."

"Right." Twilight shrugged. "So Applejack, Pinkie's throwing a party for our friend here tonight."

"I'll bring the cider, y'all can't have a party without me."

The purple unicorn chuckled.

"That's why we're here! See you tonight, AJ."

"Bye, Twilight. Bye, Fluttershy. Bye, what's your name."

"Bye Applejack!" we all three said in unison.

Walking away, I looked nervously behind me. I was pretty sure earning AJ's and Rainbow Dash's trust would be difficult. I shouldn't care, for I have never cared about anyone or anything in my life since years, but strangely I was caring here... Maybe some interdimensional stuff fucking with my mind, who knows.

"Where to, next?" I asked.

Fluttershy landed on my shoulders, and wrapped her hooves around my neck. My eyes widened and I blushed, trying hard not to show it.

"Don't you remember?" she asked.

"Um... I think it was Pinkie who said I needed clothes or something, right? I guess we should go see Rarity then. Shouldn't we?"

"It's right over there! Come on!" a voice behind me spoke, turning out to be none other than the pink party pony. She jumped on my shoulders too and pushed Fluttershy aside, each of them occupying one shoulder. Considering their size, I'd have evaluated their weight at around a hundred pounds for the average pony, but even with two of them riding on my back, I wasn't feeling the slightest struggle. And that's adding to my natural weight. Strange... I'm starting to like this new dimension. Maybe Twilight's right, maybe I even have some powers here. Cutie Mark Crusaders, weight lifters! I was laughing at my own shit when I caught a glimpse of the lightning fast cyan blur heading right towards me. Before I could do or say anything, a powerful blow to the chest sent me staggering backwards, struggling not to fall on my ass. No need to ask what it was, after regaining my balance and composure, I brushed some rainbow colored feathers off my shirt, and let out a small giggle.

"Ah, Rainbow Dash, I knew you-" I quickly shut up at the sight of the cyan mare knocked out in front of me, laying on her back, unconscious. Twilight rushed over to her.

"Oh my Gosh, Rainbow Dash! What happened?"

"Oh my Gosh, Dashie! Are you hurt? Are you-"

"Pinkie, we need to get her to a hospital! She might... Wait, what the hay?"

Suddenly all three conscious ponies were staring at me.

"Uh... I still don't know what happened. Did she fly into me and knock herself out? Rainbow Dash, who can fly at fucking Mach 5, knocked herself out by flying into me, and I'm not even hurt? What the fuck is going on?"

Twilight gasped. "You said you wouldn't-"

"I'm sorry Twilight but, honestly, I'm starting to be... scared. This is all too strange for me. I lived on Earth all my life, I know how things work back there, but here I can carry two ponies on my shoulders and walk away from a head-on collision with a pegasus flying at nearly the speed of sound? Seriously, what the f-... I mean. Seriously?"

Suddenly feeling like an asshole, more concerned about the fact I had a hard time getting used to Equestria than about the fact I might have just killed Rainbow Dash, I kneeled down beside her.

"I'm sorry Dashie, I'll help you, don't worry."

I pressed a thumb against her neck and lowered my head against her chest.

"What are you doing?" asked Fluttershy.

"She's breathing normally, she's gonna be fine. But we need to bring her somewhere she can rest. It could take a long time before she even wakes up, the blow seemed rather powerful to me."

I picked up the unconscious pegasus in my arms, and started walking forward. The three other colored ponies followed me, apparently thinking I knew where I was going. After a few minutes, we somehow arrived into Ponyville.

"Well that was lucky." I muttered.

"Quick, let's-" Twilight couldn't finish her sentence as she heard a grunt coming from the pegasus in my arms.

Dash opened her eyes and gasped at my sight.

"Oh my God oh my God oh my God!" she screamed, and bucked as violently as she could, though she ended up propelling herself away from me, rather than pushing me away. She fell flat on the ground, and grunted again.

"Hey, don't worry, no one's gonna hurt you." I said, unsure of whether she could actually hurt me physically or not.

"What are... What are you?"

"A human. A creature y'all would classify as mythologic, I guess."

"Don't worry Dashie, he's a friend! I'm gonna throw him a big party tonight! You coming?"

"Uh... What happened Pinkie?"

"Aw, silly. You flew too fast, as usual, and you hit him. But he seems to be unusually strong and you barely even grazed him, however you knocked yourself out cold."

"Please don't try no experiments or anything, I've never been particularly strong in my world, and although I have no idea what just happened, I don't wanna get hurt just because you thought I was stronger than I actually am. Not that I'm a pussy or anything but uh, I doubt pony doctors could easily fix me up, should something serious happen to me."

Rainbow Dash frowned and looked at me, confused. While I could practically see a million questions popping up in her mind, she only asked one.

"What's a pussy?"

I smirked, now knowing that at I could use at least -one- mild swearing word.

"Something you're more likely than me to get." I muttered inaudibly.

"What was that?"

"Nothing, nothing. It's nothing important, really.", the look on my face clearly showing that I'd rather not have to say anything else on the subject.

"Oh..." she looked at her pony friends. "Is he always weird and mysterious like that?"

Fluttershy looked up (for once).

"Oh no, he's really kind and he... He treated me well, I could have gotten hurt."

"Wait guys, what happened?" asked the multicolored pegasus.

"I missed a spell, Fluttershy got hit by the effect, she got sent in his... world. In another dimension. He rescued her and when Princess Celestia and I managed to bring her back, she asked if we could bring him too. He gladly accepted, seeing how dark and inhospitable his world is..."

"Oh... Can you fly?"

"I'm afraid I can't. Twilight said I might have hidden powers but I'm sure as hay they aren't flying."

"That... sucks. Hey, you know the Wonderbolts?"

"I... heard, about them."

"Do you like them?" her eyes were illuminated, and for a moment I thought she'd knock me over and start making out with me or something if I said yes.

"Who doesn't? They're pretty awesome." I said, brushing off those weird thoughts that hadn't stopped piling up in my head since I got there. She smiled and hugged me tightly, this time nearly hurting me.

"Easy Rainbow Dash, I'm... I..." I quickly realized that I had no good reason to deny her a hug, so I hugged her back. However, my eyes wandered away from that particular cyan pegasus, and onto a certain yellow one, whose glare could have melted glaciers. Was she jealous or something? I broke free from my embrace with Dash, and dropped her on the ground. At least she didn't ask how I knew her name. Maybe things are gonna get easier from now on...  
No really. Who am I even trying to fool?

"Okay so, we were heading for Rarity's. Wanna tag along?"

"Sure thing. What's this all about though? Are you gonna get a dress or something?"

"Well uh, I hope not a dress but, Pinkie said I had to look good to attend her party tonight and I don't wanna disappoint her so I'm gonna get myself some new threads."

Her wings started flapping in excitement. "I love Pinkie's parties!"

I never actually went to a party during my time on Earth but, maybe without the smell of alcohol, smoke and puke, and without copious amounts of retards making out with each other, half naked and half passed out, it might be actually enjoyable.

I knocked on the door of the Carousel Boutique. A very feminine voice rang in the silent air. "One moment, darlings!"

Half a minute later, the door opened and a very glamour-looking Rarity appeared.

"Oh... Oh my! What is that... That creature? Its mane is absolutely gorgeous!"

I had blushed more in a few hours than I ever did in twenty-three years but I guess I was starting to get used to it.

"Uh, thanks miss, but that's not really a... mane. But thanks for the compliment!"

Upon examinating me closer, she asked her friends. "Where is... this, from?"

Twilight seemed like she didn't even have the courage to explain yet another time what happened.

"Missed spell... Fluttershy... another dimension... he saved her... brought back both of them."

Meanwhile I grabbed a strand of my hair, and saw that it was shining with a bright golden blonde color, and pink highlights. It was then that I realized something else was off. It was a good eight inches shorter than usual, barely reaching my shoulderblades. Okay now what the fuck? This is the coiffure I had about three years ago. So I underwent physical changes too? Maybe that's how I got so strong? Maybe that's-  
My thoughts were cut short by Rarity's giggling. Apparently they were having a conversation while I was admiring my hair like a girl.

"So yeah, we need you to design him something for the party tonight, would be embarrassing for him to go like this."

I looked at my black DragonForce T-shirt and woodland camouflaged jeans, and frowned. Well, it sure didn't fit the pony world. Speaking of which, if they knew nothing about my world, maybe I could just show them many things, and they'd think I invented it, and worship me and shit? I was smiling like a dumbfuck when Rarity grabbed my hand and dragged me inside the boutique.

"C'mon darling, I think I got just what you need."

Oh God, please don't have them telling me I need to undress.

"Stand there, mensurations won't take long." she said, using her magic to make random stuff levitate. Stuff I didn't even know the name of due to my aversion for fashion, looks or really anything related to appearance. After a while, she wrote down what seemed like to be numbers.

"Alright darling, please undress, I'll be with you a minute."

That sounded far too... Fucked up. But I knew I had to do it, and anyway they were probably oblivious to human anatomy. As I took my pants off, I noticed something. Something that just had no place on my outer thigh. It kinda looked like a tattoo, but upon closer inspection, I found that it was actually an icicle. How the fuck did I get an icicle drawn on my thigh again? No point in even attempting to think about it, this is Equestria after all. And then I looked at my other thigh.  
Mother of Celestia.

I had an icicle as my cutie mark? What the hell was that even supposed to mean? Because I'm cold? Because I'm insensitive to cold? Because I like winter? Because I used to fanboy Ice-type Pokémon? As much as I'd have liked to just brush it off and pretend it didn't matter, I couldn't help feeling concerned about this. After all, one's cutie mark was supposed to represent inner talents and shit. But then I wasn't a pony either...

I heard hoofsteps closing in. Shit.

"I think I have your-" she stopped dead in her tracks upon seeing me half naked. "Well that... that's something." she said.

"Yeah yeah, whatever. Just give me the clothes already, I don't exactly feel comfortable here."

"No I mean, your cutie mark... Is it a knife?"

"Apparently no, it's an icicle."

"An icicle... What do you mean, 'apparently'?"

"I mean that this is the first time I see it. Humans don't have cutie marks, and I'm utterly confused about it right now."

"Hm... Maybe going to Equestria granted you some special powers, and your cutie mark's here to help you figure out which ones?"

"That's what the other are saying, and I'm starting to think so as well but... What could an icicle mean?"

"Maybe you can control winter elements. Snow, ice... Try it?"

"How could I try something I don't know about? What season is it here anyway?"

"Late fall. Winter's coming soon."

"Oh... Whatever. Give me my clothes, please?"

"Oh no, darling. Now that I saw your cutie mark, I need to totally redesign those. I'll be back shortly." she blew me a kiss and left the room.

Now really, I've been saying that countless times since I got here but, what the actual, serious fuck? This is getting weirder by the minute. I feel like I'm 'inside' the Internet or something. That's how weird it is.

After sitting there for what felt like at least half an hour (why did I forget to put on my watch before clenching that damn paper? why don't I sleep with my watch? so many questions left unanswered) Rarity came back, with a beautiful light blue ensemble. Snow white T-shirt with three light blue snowflakes knitted on the chest area, and light blue pants with some pure white patches. They looked like bleached jeans, actually. She had even made blue sneakers with white lacing. Not even bothering asking her how she could design such shit from scratch, while not knowing anything about the human body, I put the ensemble on and looked at myself in a mirror. I looked... Different. Aside from my different hairstyle, I also looked a lot more... Bulky. I've always been large and overweight but, while this hadn't changed, I was now looking more buff, like a wrestler or something. Everytime I start hating this place, something positive happens and vice-versa... I'm not gonna complain about that anyway. After thanking Rarity, I walk out of the boutique and find... Nothing.

Motherfuckers! They all went home? I obviously don't know my way around. Damn it.

I started walking in a random way when I felt a weight on my shoulders, and a pink strand of hair in front of my face. The light pink along with actually noticeable weight made me guess it was Fluttershy.

"Is someone up here?" I asked playfully.

"If it's okay with you... I can walk if you don't want to have me riding you."

Holy fucking Jesus that sounded even worse than the other shit my twisted mind had been misinterpreting all day long.

"Nah you can stay here, I like having you on me."

Well seeing how oblivious they are, I can at least have a little fun with it, can't I?

"Who's gonna be at the party?"

"Oh, you know, pretty much everypony in town. Pinkie's parties are very popular and all ponies love 'em. You'll most likely meet the vast majority of Ponyville, and probably some pegasi from Cloudsdale as well."

"That's... Nice, I guess. I've never really met much people back on Earth."

"Stay with me, I'll introduce you." she wrapped her hooves around my neck once again (or was it Pinkie who did it? Confound these motherfucking ponies, they drive me to amnesia) and nuzzled my ear, forcing me to contain a slight moan. Preferring to go with the idea that she's totally oblivious to how whatever she's doing could be interpreted by a human, I kept on walking.

We walked together to Sugarcube Corner, earning all sorts of glares from random passersby, ranging from fear to amusement, and even disgust. Or, more exactly, I walked. That's just my luck, a flying creature, and I'm actually carrying her around. Not that I mind, but the thought of it sparkled memories in my mind, about my legendary bad luck. I strongly hope it's another thing I'll have left back on Earth...


	4. Evening Star

**_A/N: Sorry, this chapter is really short, but I needed to keep it short in order to make room for the next one, which will be action-packed. And yes, I'd rather keep the guy nameless, since it's basically me, and I find that using my own name in a fanfic feels just... wrong. It doesn't sound good either, and I can't really think of any name I like so..._**  
**_Yeah._**

Few hours ago, I entered Sugarcube Corner with Fluttershy riding on my back, and the other five ponies were here already. We laughed, we talked, we drank... Few hours later, I'm sitting on a folding chair, far away from the 'action', and just chilling here with my glass of cider.

So, this is what a party is like... Kinda strange if you ask me. All these people, I mean, ponies, dancing to random techno music, eating cupcakes and drinking cider and stuff... All of this, for hours? Yup, definitely not my thing. At least I have Fluttershy near me. Wait, where is she?

Realization hits me as I stand up, alone in a corner while everypony else was dancing and having fun. I wouldn't have expected myself to do anything else really but, Fluttershy was beside me the last time I checked. Did I fall asleep? Or daydream so deeply that I actually didn't notice her leave?

My eyes scan the room. Ponies, ponies everywhere. Dancing, jumping around, kissing... Wait what? Kissing? I rub my eyes with my hands and take a second look at this shit. Yep, some of them are kissing. Mother of God.  
At this moment I was wishing I could have finished watching the second half of season 2, and all of season 3 before ending up here, so I'd know who's kissing who. Fucking background ponies.

Anyway, Fluttershy is nowhere to be seen. I walk to the bar and get yet another glass of cider, which I know I shouldn't but fuck this I'm 'partying'. I like to tell myself that sitting in a corner and watching the others is considered partying. Sitting in a corner... Camper.  
Shit, now I miss Call of Duty.

There are no brakes on my train of thoughts. It keeps going, wilder and weirder, until something makes me snap out of it. In this case, the sight of a stallion dragging Fluttershy out of the restrooms did the trick. The look of distress in her eyes and her front hooves waving in my general direction only fueled the burning hatred in my eyes. I quickly walked up to them and stood right in front of the stallion.  
Much to my surprise, he spoke first.

"Hey buddy! What's up? I never saw you around?"

"You're not gonna be able to ever see anything again if you don't let her go, now."

"Easy there, mate. She's got a crush on me, you know? I mean, I don't even know what kind of creature you are, and frankly I couldn't care less, but you see, ponies get along with other ponies, that's basic stuff. Right, uh... What's your name again? Stuttershy?"

By this point I was almost smiling. Smiling from both the pain I was about to bring upon him, and his blantant idiocy. The desperate, pleading look in the yellow mare's eyes, however, quickly erased any positive thought from my mind.

"Seriously, get out of here before things get ugly."

"You're gonna have to wait for your turn, mate. She's gonna be busy with me for a while, if you know what I mean."

Must... Resist... Temptation... A murder within one day of being here wouldn't look too good on my résumé.

"I'm dead serious. Let Fluttershy go, before I take care of it myself."

By now I was sweating bullets and my eyes were probably brighter than a thousand Suns. I was about to grab his neck and drag him away from the poor yellow pegasus when he stomped the ground and blew a small cloud of smoke out of his 'nostrils'.

"Buck you mate, go get your own marefriend!"

"You what, you cheeky little cunt? Bloody hell, I'll wreck you, I swear to Chr- uh I mean, Celestia, I'll hook you in the gabber mate!" I said, grabbing him by his mane, which instantly froze under my touch. I mean, literally froze. As in, turned into solid ice.  
What the extreme fuck?

He instantly let go of Fluttershy and staggered backwards.

"My... My mane! You... What did you... Oh my Gosh! My beautiful mane!" he screamed frantically, starting to panic.

I staggered backwards as well, and although it took all my self-control not to scream (not sure if surprise, excitement, or fear) about what had just happened, I somehow managed to keep on a straight face, and unusually deep voice.

"Get away from her. And stay away." I was almost sure my glare would melt his mane back to normal.

"What the... How did you... This is some serious magic stuff!" He scowled. I didn't know what to think nor what to say, too astonished by the fact I actually had powers.

"I didn't say my last words, you'll hear from me. I'll make you pay for this. Faltershy, we'll meet again, baby, this I promise."

Oh no he didn't. He did not just call -my- Fluttershy 'baby'. Wait, since when is she mine? Screw that, there are more important matters at hand.

"Get lost, now... Before I deep-freeze you."

Not wanting to take any chances, he reluctantly trotted away, turning into a full gallop as soon as he was outside of the building. He was leaving a few droplets in his trail, though I couldn't tell whether it was sweat or his iced mane melting.

"Well, this I'm sure could have totally happened in a human party." I muttered to myself, picking up Fluttershy and sitting back on the chair I've been occupying the entire evening, with the fear-struck pony in my arms.

"Don't worry, it's over. He won't do anything to you, I'm here." God I suck at sounding reassuring.

I didn't know what happened between her and this stallion, and though the look in her eyes was a clear sign that my intervention was well-timed and welcomed, I wa actually wondering what had really happened in the first place.  
She was shivering, snuggling against me as tightly as she could. Before I could take another sip of my cider, she was already asleep. This would have been almost cute, if it didn't mean I had to carry her back to her cottage, not to mention that I didn't have the slightest clue as to where the fuck it was located.

After thanking Pinkie, and everypony else, though strangely no one seemed to care about what happened. Or maybe they didn't see? Meh, who cares.  
I asked the pink party pony where Fluttershy was living, and instead of telling me she instantly offered me to tag along.

"As long as you don't ride on me, I'm cool with that."

She giggled and started jumping beside me. Right, Pinkie doesn't walk, she jumps. Somehow it's not as funny without the 'boink' sound effects.

"So, what happened?" she asked, and although I didn't really want to go into details, I did my best to give her a rough idea of what happened.

"Such a gentlecolt... Fluttershy, you're lucky, you know that?" she said to the quiet animal-loving pony, still asleep in my arms.

"Lucky? Lucky about what?" I inquired.

"Duh, lucky to have you! I'd find it so romantic if somepony did-"

"Wait wait wait, to have me? What are you trying to imply?"

"Isn't she... Oh? Nevermind then. Well, she's still lucky." she gave me a shit-eating grin, and resumed jump-walking, propelling herself high enough to actually match my height, despite the tip of her curly mane standing at a meager three feet and a half.  
Pinkie motherfucking Pie. Defying the laws of physics since 2010.

"We're here!" Pinkie practically screamed, her enthusiasm never showing any kind of weakness.

"Alright, thanks Pinkie. Hope you'll throw another party soon!" I said, deep inside knowing she would, and hoping I'd be able to find a good excuse. God I hate parties.

"I always throw parties, silly!" she said matter-of-factly, before turning back and jumping towards Ponyville.

"See you later!" her voice was delayed by nearly one full second as she disappeared over the horizon, still hopping around.

So that might explain how the Sonic Rainboom works, the speed of sound seems to be far lower in Equestria... And I can turn stuff into ice. Seriously, this was so... Cool. I'm pretty sure it was out of pure anger, and I would need years of practice to be able to do it at will, but at least now I know that I have powers, and that my newfound cutie mark means something.

And, people (well, ponies) seem to think that Fluttershy and me... Well this should prove to be interesting. My head filled with thoughts of how I could wrap Winter up all by myself, control shit and save Fluttershy another handful of times, I started walking towards... Wait, where the fuck am I supposed to sleep? Fluttershy said I could sleep at her cottage but, she's sleeping. Ah, to hell with it. Time to see if it looks anything like it does in the show.

Well I'll be damned, it does. Against my better judgement, I lay her down on the bed upstairs, and slip under the blanket, right next to her. I cup her head in my hand, give her a soft peck on the cheek, and sigh heavily.

"I wish this could last forever..."


	5. Revolution Deathsquad

**_A/N: Sorry for the last chapter being so short, here's a much longer one. Read the other A/N at the end before asking questions, please._**  
**_This chapter contains lots of violence / fighting, and slightly disturbing / gory content. Believe me it's really not that bad (and not gratuitous), hence the rating remaining T._**  
**_I just felt like writing an action scene and I had an idea of something I wanted to include, which added several twists. Whatever, onto the story!_**

"No! Stay... Stay away from me! He... Help!"

I could hear her perfectly now. Running through the thick woods as fast as I could, slashing through bushes and branches with a large machete, I was getting close. Close to her. Whatever was happening, I was going to save her.

I would not lose her. Ever. To anything or anyone.

Powered by anger, fear, adrenaline and a glimpse of love, I hacked my way through the few remaining feet of dense foliage, and what I saw nearly froze me in place.

A mother. Fucking. Hydra. And it had Fluttershy cornered, its four heads taking turns at taunting and scaring her. Out of the water, it was absolutely gigantic, standing at what I estimated to be about forty feet, give or take a few. How was I supposed to do anything against... This? Each of its four necks were easily four feet thick, much larger than my machete. I would get stomped if I attempted to go near it anyway, ponies might have the agility to escape this monster but I sure as hell didn't.

What surprised me though, is that it still hadn't attacked her. I had been chasing her screams for several minutes now, screams of fear and despair, but why was that creature just... Taunting her?  
It made no sense. That is, until Fluttershy saw me, cried out my name, and the Hydra turned its four heads towards me. Four giant smiles spread across those ugly faces, and one of them started laughing in a way that, even though I hated admitting it, scared me. Big time.

"Finally, you have come. Be not afraid, for we will not hurt your beloved one."

I dropped my machete and stood there, bewildered.

"What the... What are you talking about? What do you want from me?"

"Very simple." the creature smirked, and one if its heads lowered down to my level. "We want your life."

As much as I hated myself for the words I was about to speak, I clearly didn't have the advantage here. "I just... Um, maybe we could talk this over? No one needs to be hurt."

"Oh... Right. Who wants to put that to a vote?"

I blinked a few times, peering around me, but I couldn't see anything. Somehow the whole clearing had become pure darkness. Luna's gorgeous Moonlight was blocked by black clouds, and the only light source came from the bolts of lighting sparking and running through them. To my left, something moved. A pony jumped out of a nearby bush.  
Pinkamena Diane Pie, holding a large knife in her mouth.

"His life." she spoke, disturbingly calmly.

To my right now, another bush, another pony jumping from the shadows, a telltale rainbow forming behind its similarly colored tail.

"His life." said Rainbow Dash, just as calmly, though her magenta eyes were menacing.

I felt like I was in some kind of B-horror movie. I was almost expecting yet another pony to jump from behind me and say the same. And I was close enough. Twilight Sparkle teleported in front of me, and used her magic to write 'HIS LIFE' into the clouds with flashes of lightning. As beautiful as it was, I was really starting to feel like I should hightail it out of here, fast. But then this was the Everfree Forest, there was probably some kind of magic stuff going on, and it would have prevented me from doing anything.  
My fate was sealed anyway...

"His life." I heard a shy voice say.

No... No it can't be... Fluttershy?  
She was now free from the Hydra, and standing right in front of me, along with her three pony friends. She spoke shyly yet evilly.

"You were always unhappy back on Earth. This is because the rulers of your world tried to eliminate you since your birth, however they never managed to come anywhere near succeeding, only grazing you emotionally. Believing that you had powers humans were not supposed to have, they contacted the rulers of Equestria. After a long discussion, both parties decided on a simple and easy way to remedy to this. You were introduced to a made-up cartoon, which in turn made it possible for Princess Celestia to teleport you in Equestria, as you had to agree in order for it to work. Now, with the power of magic that your world lacks, you can be taken out easily. I'm sorry, this was all fake. You may be terminated now. I still kind of enjoyed cuddling next to you on Earth... Goodbye. Diane, if you please..."

Pinkamena was slowly walking towards me, smiling creepily with that large-ass knife in her mouth, as white and shiny as her teeth.

"Oh hell no, you're not gonna do anything. I'm not going down. Not without a fight!"

"You're helpless here, you... human. Your newfound powers will not help you."

"But this will!" I screamed as I made a mad dash for my machete, standing a few feet away. I managed to get my hand on the handle, however Rainbow Dash grabbed the back of my shirt, and started trying to lift me and carry me away. Under normal circumstances I'd have laughed at such a pathetic attempt, but I didn't exactly have much time. I grabbed her by her left wing and threw her as far away from me as I could, though she just ended up hovering a few dozen feet away. Standing up, machete in hand, I adopted a combat stance and waited for whatever they were gonna do.

Twilight was fair and kind, I knew this much, but I was really expecting her to just use her magic and turn my only weapon against me. However, instead of my own tool, it was her horn that tried to stab me. As she jumped towards me, ready to strike, I threw a violent punch at her face before she could lower her head to align her horn with my chest, and she collapsed on the ground at my feet, a large portion of her mane completely frozen.  
She got up, panting from rage and pain. Her horn started to glow, and I knew exactly what was going to happen. Focusing all my might on the machete, I turned it into solid ice before I fully lost grip on it. Mentally not letting go, I somehow managed to melt the ice, and as the once sharp tool connected with my chest, a stream of water fell on the ground, soaking my T-shirt, my shoes, and Twilight's face. Her horn stopped glowing as droplets of water entered her eyes, making her recoil backwards.

'Pinkie' was agape, and I used that to my advantage by closing the distance and kicking her in the face, sending her knife fly into the bushes. She muttered something about how I wasn't funny and she wouldn't throw my soon to be dead body a party, and she sat on the ground frowning and pouting, forelegs crossed.  
Fluttershy took a step towards me. She was fighting back tears.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to be that way..."

"But why... Why do you... Why would people want to kill me? I sure as hell want many people to die but... How was being born something that by itself made me deserve to die?"

"That is something you'll have to figure out by yourself..." her face darkened and her eyes brightened, her iris an eerie, almost ghostly shade of turquoise green. "In Hell." she finished her sentence.

My mind was numb from all the things it was trying to process at once. All my senses were numb, actually. I hadn't even noticed the sudden change of scenery to my right.  
In the bushes, now shining a dark, bloody red, stood a human. He stepped closer. A brutal metal riff had started playing out of nowhere. He was somewhat lanky, had a guitar strapped onto his back, black hair, wore a black T-shirt with a 'Ramones' logo and camouflaged pants. Beside him stood a blue unicorn with a very light blue mane and tail, wearing a purple cape and a hat. He glared at Fluttershy.

"He already comes from Hell. You're not gonna send him back." he loudly cracked his neck bones. He looked down to the unicorn. "Trixie... It's go time. You know what to do."

On his command, the blue pony nodded and jumped into the air, her horn glowing particularly bright shades of blue and purple, seemingly absorbing nearby particles of energy. After a few seconds, she let out a giant stream of multicolor psychic energy. She first aimed the powerful beam at the three ponies that just had attempted to kill me, turning all of them into ashes within seconds. The devastating psychic laser moving around, all I could see was a cloud of red mist, followed by four heads falling to the ground, motionless. A large orange body with four giant stumps attached to it soon collasped nearby, sending my former friends' ashes flying into the air. I was terrified but also mesmerized by whatever the fuck was currently going on.

The yellow pegasus rose into the air, and started flying towards Trixie. The blue unicorn answered by casting a powerful telekinesis spell, stopping Fluttershy dead in her tracks.

"She's right where we want her. Finish her, Trixie." the human spoke again, an evil grin forming on his face, his dark eyes now shining with hatred and malice.

The unicorn's horn was glowing more intensely every second. The psychic force field around the body of my former love interest was now growing larger and larger. I shielded my eyes as I heard a deafening scream, and a cartoon-like 'pop' sound. Then the sound of something hitting the ground. I tried to open my eyes but I was paralyzed in terror.  
A few seconds later, I regained control of my body, and my eyes revealed that I was standing in the middle of a now normal clearing. Green grass, beautiful Moonlight radiating from above, all dead bodies gone, except... Fluttershy, or what was left of her, was laying on the ground before me, in a pool of blood. Most of her skin was gone, skeleton and highly damaged internal organs showing. I almost threw up on the spot when I heard a now familiar voice coming from the bushes nearby.

"Good fight, time to get laid!" the mysterious boy said, grasping the unicorn's flank and giving her a sensual slap.

She squirmed and smiled at him, a smut look of satisfaction on her face. "The Great and Powerful Trixie always prevails."

"That's my pony! Onwards to Carousel Boutique now! I know a certain capitalist puta who I'd definitely like to see suffer the same fate."

"As you wish, Master." she said playfully, winking at him.

I finally snapped back to reality and called for them.

"Wait! Who are you? Why did you save me? What's going on?"

"Dude, I don't know. I had too much of those fucking cheap beers, and it's past midnight anyway so, à plus tard, tarlouze."

On these words, he and Trixie disappeared into a puff of purple smoke. Well wasn't that the strangest thing ever. For the third time I snapped back to... Can I even say 'reality' anymore? Fluttershy's thrashed and mutilated body caught my attention once again, and soon enough I was kneeling on the ground, begging for the tears to start flowing. I cannot cry. I am physically unable to.

"Why? WHY?"

To my surprise, her voice rang in my ears.

"I thought... You'd like it..."

"Why? Oh God, why? WHYYYY-"

I suddenly felt a sharp pain on my forearm. I blinked really fast a few times. The clearing was now a room. Fluttershy's dead body was very much alive. The grass was now a bed. I was laying in her bed. With blistering hot tea spilled onto my forearm.

Holy motherfucker. This was just a nightmare... The first in years. Note to self: never, ever drink again at a party.  
The yellow pegasus' eyes were starting to fill with tears.

"I'm so sorry... I thought you'd enjoy having breakfast in bed, you took care of me last night, I wanted to repay you...

I'm sorry!"

"No, no, don't cry! I just..." I didn't want to tell her, this nightmare was way too disturbing and gruesome. "It's just that... I don't drink bloody tea."

"Oh... Well do you want some coffee instead?"

"Um, no thanks Flutty. I'll be fine, I don't even usually have breakfast. I skip straight to lunch."

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to-" I silenced her with a kiss on the cheek.

"That's fine, don't worry now alright? I'm actually kind of hungry, so I'll eat it anyway."

I started munching on some buttered toast while she laid down near me and started talking.

"It was so awesome how you defended me, so beautiful and kind of you, my friends usually stand up for me but the way you acted was... I, um..."

I was blushing. "I did it just for you, you know. I mean, had it been anypony else, I would still have helped" I lied,

"but I did it this way just for you. He deserved a lesson, and I don't think he'll ever come near you again."

"Thanks again... I think he wanted to, um... I don't know, Twilight showed me some book on the anatomy differences between mares and stallions but, I don't really know how this works? I think he wanted to do something related to that, I'm not sure."

Holding back a laugh, I spoke. "Um, yeah, I think so too. But don't worry he'll never get you." I was actually horrified at the thought of a horse cock violating -my- little pony.

Note to self number two, establish a list of facts and data about Equestria. Just in case... Lower speed of sound, average ponies standing at about three feet and three to four inches, and different physics, although it might just be Pinkie bending them at will.  
Screw the rules, she's Pinkie Pie.

I was pondering over those thoughts while drinking whatever tea I hadn't burnt my forearm with, and finishing my last toast. Really, three toasts? I'm gonna lose some weight if I stay here... I'm also gonna starve.  
Curses.

* * *

**_A/N: This chapter is basically one big shoutout to... dunno, many things._**  
**_The mysterious human is a friend of mine, who loves Trixie and hates Rarity. The way he 'uses' Trixie is obviously a big reference to your average Pokémon battle. Most of his lines come from the Mercs' announcer in Call of Duty: Black Ops II multiplayer. The rest is random shit and insider jokes only he and I can understand._**  
**_Pinkamena Diane Pie with a knife, well you can figure this one out on your own I guess._**  
**_Not much to say about the rest, if anything, you can leave in the comments (reviews I mean, whatever) at which moment you started to realize it was actually a dream all along._**  
**_Chapter 6 will be... Well, you'll see. Nosfrat, out._**


	6. Prepare For War

**_A/N: Another rather short chapter, but I have some good news. I'm starting to get a feeling for where this story is going, and how it's gonna end. Well, maybe not 'end' just yet, chances are there will be at least 12-15 chapters, but for now I'm pretty happy with it. I just have those urges of writing action scenes, and although they might not suit everyone, they're necessary to understand what's coming next._**  
**_Chapter 7 is fully written, I'll upload it in a few days._**  
**_Nosfrat, out._**

Late morning, the Sun was shining bright, the sky was free of clouds, the flowers were blooming... This was beautiful. I truly wasn't miss anything related to my previous life on Earth, although it had been only a day I was already enjoying being here. I hoped I would never have to go back...

I was walking around with Fluttershy, looking at the beautiful scenery. I had always lived in the city, and could never enjoy walking in green areas. Various animals running around, birds chipping, pegasi flying about... Everything felt so peaceful, so right. The way life should be for every living creature.

I hadn't said a word about my nightmare, and I wasn't planning on doing so. I wasn't quite sure why I'd have a nightmare in the first place, seeing as I haven't had any in nearly five years, but I didn't want to let that thought ruin my day.

"Where are we going, Flutty?"

"Um, maybe we could spend some time at Sweet Apple Acres? It's beautiful, and Applejack could show you things."

"Sure, that sounds fun. Let's go."

Needless to say, I was walking while the 'flying' pony was resting on my shoulders, the tip of her pink mane slightly brushing against my forehead, perfectly blending with the purple highlights I used to have, that had somehow returned. I was wondering if anything else had changed physically for me, as I hadn't really taken the time to check much about myself. In fact, I've been ridiculously busy compared to my former life, which consisted of sitting and waiting for... Fuck knows what.  
A life of emptiness and boredom.

Brushing off those thoughts, I realized that I was standing before a giant apple orchard. It was truly beautiful, but then again those are things I had never seen before, due to living in concrete, surrounded by concrete.

"All these apples... Wow." I was actually salivating at the sight, mostly because I had eaten less since two days than I usually do in one single lunch.

A familiar orange figure walked up to us. "Never seen so many of them, uh? Y'all wanna see how to buck 'em?"

"Hey there Applejack. Sure, go on, show me."

She bucked a few trees, apples falling to the ground and rolling about. She picked one up and ate it faster than it should physically be possible. She then engulfed another one.

"I'm really hungry now." I said, reaching down for one of the apples. I took a large bite. God, this tasted so good.  
Whenever I go back on Earth, assuming I ever do, I'm totally moving to the countryside.

"Can we do anything for you Applejack? I mean, you know, I'm new here, I don't have much to do."

"Sure, you could try bucking them apples. Can you hit hard enough?" she asked playfully, before violently bucking another tree, an apple falling on her head. I laughed at the sight, and she scowled at me. "So, can you?"

"Let's find out." I said, determined to prove her, and myself, that being nearly two feet and a half taller, and weighing probably thrice as much as her, my strength should at least match hers.

I punched the first tree in sight, hoping that they were weaker than the trees back on Earth, and I quickly wished I hadn't. While I did punch hard enough to make a few apples drop, my hand was now hurting something fierce. I rubbed it with my other hand, and winced in pain.

"I ain't build for this shit." I muttered, panting.

Applejack was laughing hard, but Fluttershy hadn't said a word since we left her cottage. I was wondering what was on her mind.

"You're supposed to buck 'em with your rear legs, y'know!"

I didn't find anything to say that could have hidden the massive amount of stupidity I had just displayed, so I just kept it shut.

After spending an hour or two walking about, watching the Earth pony buck trees with impressive strength and catching apples with agility that I could only dream of ever having, we had lunch at the farm. While it was good, I swore to myself I wouldn't get anywhere close to an apple for quite some time.  
We kept on chatting and laughing for a few hours. It was soon time to go home. Applejack had given us lots of apples, which both Fluttershy and I were carrying. I had two large bags in both hands, and she had two saddlebags full of apples. Dusk was setting in, we were almost at her cottage when we saw some bushes rattle, which make me snap out of my thoughts, which were somewhere along the lines of 'holy shit what the hell am I gonna do with all these fucking apples?'.

True to herself, Fluttershy dropped to the ground, both hooves covering her eyes. I rolled my eyes, dropped my bags and jogged over to the bushes, spreading them apart with my hands, only to get bucked in the face.  
Holy shit this fucking hurts. I fell to the ground, covering my face in pain. I heard a familiar voice.

"Oi, told you you'd hear from me, mate."

That fucking stallion from yesterday's party. That was it, he was so dead now.

I quickly rose to my feet, blocking his path to Fluttershy.

"I told you to leave her alone! What do you want now?"

"What you prevented me from getting yesterday. But today, I... I mean, -we-, will prevail."

"We?"

"C'mon guys, let's do this!" he yelled, and three other stallions jumped from behind the bushes.

None of them looked really threatening, standing at what I estimated to be about four feet, maybe four and a half, except for one of them, who looked dangerously close to me in terms of height, and looked rather buff. Red fur, blonde mane... Half-apple as a cutie mark?  
Big Mac? What the fuck was he doing with... Those?

Fluttershy, who had uncovered her eyes, saw him.

"Bi... Big Mac?" she spoke nervously.

"Eeyup."

"What... what are you doing?"

"Not sure. They said they needed help to get revenge on a mean bully who had attacked them, but... What is this?" he asked, looking confused from seeing Fluttershy.

"Alright what are you four up to?" I asked, ready to kick their asses back to wherever the fuck they came from.

The one I assumed was the leader, took a step forward. "We're going to teach you not to stick your snout in other people's business."

I had no guarantee of winning against all four of them at once, so I tried to talk my way out of this.

"Big Mac, this motherf-... I mean, this mean stallion, was going to -rape- Fluttershy yesterday! I saved her, and you're gonna help him not only get back at me, but also rape her for real this time?"

"Rape?" the large red pony looked puzzled.

"Abuse her! Sexually! Hurt her badly!" I answered, trying to make it sound as horrible as I could.

"Oh. Sexually? You mean, like, hm... Sex?" Jesus... How were foals born in Equestria again?

"Yes, sex! Forced sex! Rape!"

He shook his head, and cocked it to the side, inviting me to go on.

"Listen, it doesn't matter what it is exactly, but Fluttershy is your sister's friend! I know you're probably wondering, what kind of creature I am and how I know you or your sister, or even what I'm doing with Fluttershy, but that's not important. What's important is, you can't help those punks!"

He looked at the other three male ponies, and then at a terrified Fluttershy, before frowning. "Eenope."

In the blink of an eye, he had bucked all three of them violently enough to knock them out.

"That was close." I muttered to myself, now realizing that even a one on one against Big Mac wouldn't have ended well for my human ass. "Thanks, Big Mac."

"Eenoprob'."

I silently thanked him a second time for not offering me any apples.  
Fluttershy and I watched him walk away, and once he was out of hearing distance, I asked her: "Do things like that happen often around here? Ponies attacking other ponies, wanting to hurt them and all?"

"Um... No, never. Only sometimes, there are some mean ponies, like this one time, a blue unicorn-"

"Trixie." I said, realizing I would never be able to think about her anymore without imagining her getting it on with that mysterious dark-haired boy. What was up with that dream anyway?

"Yes, she wasn't hurting anypony physically though. There are some big villains, who try to hurt and deceive everypony, but they're really a rare occurrence... Ponies are peaceful for the most part."

I gave her a skeptical look, before shrugging it off. Probably a random temporary side-effect of my arrival in this world, I thought. Or at least, I wanted myself to think so... I had a bad feeling about all this. That kind of feeling you can't quite explain nor identify, but you know is here to stay.

"We should probably get back home, before anything else happens."

"Oh, what could possibly happen? Such a thing is way too rare to happen twice, don't worry."

"Yeah... I guess." I replied, feeling uneasy about the whole situation, and about how bold Fluttershy, -the- Fluttershy, was being about it. Deep inside I knew that this was just the first of many, and tomorrow I would have another load of problems to deal with.

After a short dinner with Fluttershy, fighting the urge to throw up with the four pounds of apples I had eaten since morning, I hesitantly made my way over to the couch, not wanting to invite myself in her bed.

"Um, you can... Sleep with me, like, if you're okay with it, of course."

I looked back at her and smiled. "I sure am okay with this, I love being near you."

She blushed, and so did I. Now maybe the word 'love' was a little strong but the fact was, I did really enjoy being near her. Her sole presence was making me feel... Relaxed. Calm. Something I usually never am. Though I was starting to have deviant thoughts, especially due to those ponies' obliviousness, I did my best to simply ignore them. After all I saved her from getting raped, maybe even twice although I doubt Big Mac would have actually gone through with helping his 'friends' hurt Fluttershy, I wasn't exactly gonna try to... Hell, what would I try anyway? She's a fucking cartoon horse.

I need some sleep. And some meat. I mean, food. Actual food, not apples. Cuddling her as tightly as I could, relishing in the tenderness that I was missing so much on Earth, I made a quick mental note of making a list of pros and cons to living in Equestria, before falling asleep, my hand almost unconsciously caressing her soft, fluffy pink mane.


	7. Soldiers Of The Wasteland

**_A/N: Another action-packed chapter, kinda over-the-top but definitely necessary to understand what's about to unfold. Also I will include Iron Will at some point, I just watched S2E19 and I just -have- to include him, most badass character ever._**  
**_*Eye Of The Tiger riff starts playing*_**

I woke up to the rays of the Sun shining through the windows, beaming us in its soothing light. My eyes... Damn it. I got up and kissed a still sleeping Fluttershy on the cheek. Realizing she was still asleep, I laid back down in the bed, and enjoyed this moment a little longer. She soon awoke, looking straight at me. I stroked her cheek gently and smiled at her.

"Slept well?"

"Wonderfully. And you?"

"Yeah, pretty well. Mostly because I was with you." I was blushing at my own choice of words. She blushed too and smiled.

"You know, I, um... Really enjoy being near you. It's like, um, you... I like you. A lot, and um... Maybe, I..."

I silenced her with a soft, chaste kiss on the lips. She blushed harder than ever, her face red as a tomato, and I burst in laughter. We cuddled for a while until some loud noises were heard outside. I reluctantly got up, grabbed my glasses and walked up to the window. Upon opening it, the scent of death, blood and shrapnel filled my nostrils.  
Wait, the fuck?

The Sun had been replaced by a dull, cloudy sky, filled with smoke and ashes. Everything was gray. Amidst the dying bodies, blood was running everywhere. Blown-off limbs, heads, wings and horns were littering what looked like a battlefield, and a mix of screams and explosions was all I could hear, the rest drowned out by constant gunfire. A few ponies were hiding in a trench in the garden, relentlessly assaulted by heavy machine gun fire and what I assumed were mortars.  
Since when did they have military equipment in Equestria?

I quickly jumped into my jeans and jogged downstairs, kicking the door open, before tripping over a Thompson submachine gun laying on the ground. Grunting, I got up and picked it up, checking its magazine before cocking it. Derpy walked up to me.

"Help us, we're outnumbered! You were on Earth, weren't you? You must have some knowledge of those... things."

Looking at the wall-eyed pony, who was wearing a battle uniform with a helmet that read 'Muffin SS', I couldn't help but feel like this was yet another nightmare. How could ponies use guns? How could Derpy aim? How could the Sun suddenly disappear? Unless Celestia... had died?  
Shit was bad, regardless of whether I was dreaming or not.  
I quickly scanned the field, and decided that a submachine gun wasn't gonna do much when the closest 'targets' were at least a hundred feet away, and hiding in trenches.

"Do you have a sniper rifle?" I asked her, half expecting her to ask me what it was.

"Um, yes. Wait here a minute, I'll go ask Captain Netgraph."

I stood there, bewildered by this whole thing. War in Equestria? Captain Netgraph? And the fact they had human weapons, World War II weapons on top of that, made it all the weirder...  
Did the portal reopen somehow? What was going on?

Before I could think any further, Derpy returned, along with two other pegasi, lifting an absolutely gigantic weapon. I quickly identified it as a PTRS-41, one of the largest and most powerful anti-matériel rifles ever made. I was on the verge of laughing at this point, this all looked so much like a cheap movie. Just like the nightmare I had...  
Figuring I wouldn't see shit if I used the gun while laying on the ground, the way it was meant to be used, I simply stood there, straining my arms to get the fifty pounds, seven feet long rifle to eye level. Aiming down the scope, I could see... Ponies. Ponies everywhere. Ponies I had never seen before, firing upon each other for no apparent reason. All uniforms were the same, with no distinguishable feature. The only way to know who was against who, was to look at who was firing at who.

Suddenly I caught a glimpse of what seemed to be a mortar crew. Unaware of the average pony's skills with mortars, but painfully aware of how it was aimed in my general direction, I took no chances and lined up a perfect headshot on the weapon operator. The .57 caliber bullet completely vaporized the poor pony's head and upper body, and I fell back on my ass, the recoil having propelled me backwards. The shot had let out a giant shockwave, it looked almost like a Sonic Rainboom, but without the rainbow part. The speed of sound in Equestria was much lower than on Earth, and such a weapon had a muzzle velocity exceeding Mach 3... It still didn't explain why other weapons were firing 'normally', as most machine guns they were using, while lacking the sheer power and kinetic energy, had a muzzle velocity rivaling that of the average anti-matériel rifle.  
This shit was so weird...

Now wondering why I had wanted a sniper rifle in the first place, instead of a standard battle rifle, I set the heavy, unpractical weapon aside and grabbed the Thompson. Praying that my myopia would advantage me as much as it used to do when it came to popping ballons in funfairs, I took aim at groups of ponies and fired away. I had no idea who was against who, but then I had no idea what they were fighting about either. If I could eliminate all of them, the war would be over, right?  
Wrong.

While I managed to drop an entire squad of over a dozen advancing ponies with ridiculously well-aimed shots, it painfully occured to me that in real life, reloading actually required carrying additional ammunition, which I wasn't. I threw the carbine away and sighed.

A pony walked up to me, with Derpy trotting behind him. She was looking at the ground and her ears were lowered. The other pony was a large, fat Earth pony, wearing a different uniform than the ones I had seen so far, and he seemed to be Derpy's Captain. He had what seemed to be a single red bar, with three taller, gray bars, as a cutie mark, not unlike a ping signal or something. He also had a short brown, curly mane and thick glasses.  
His loud, annoying voice boomed.

"I told you to get him a glorious Germane weapon! Now we're lost, and it's because of you! I've had enough of your mistakes, it's time to die."  
"Captain Netgraph, I'm sorry! I didn't..."

Before the pegasus could finish her sentence, her superior pulled out what looked like a Luger P08 handgun and brought it up to her head. Following my instincts, I took a step towards him and kicked the gun off his hoof before he could pull the trigger.  
He looked at where the pistol landed, then at me, tears forming in his rage-filled eyes. Knowing that I was much larger than him, and had just effortlessly disarmed him, he didn't try his luck. Instead, he started rubbing his apparently sore rear. He then ran away, weeping, and muttering something about 'bucking laggers'.

Derpy thanked me and gave me a hug, before walking back into the fight. I sighed, and dropped to the ground, trying to cry. I knew I wouldn't be able to, but I tried. Hard. Opening my dry eyes, I saw something in the sky. Pegasi dropping dead from everywhere, bullets, smoke, fire... But there was something quite large, heading my way.  
Something to save us? Rainbow Dash? Princess Celestia? An airdrop? A CARE package? A...  
A motherfucking mortar shell.

Getting up to my feet as quickly as I could, I grabbed the heavy anti-tank rifle one handed, and brought it to eye level with inhuman strength and swiftness, firing a blind shot in the general direction of the mortar round. Much to my surprise, it connected and exploded harmlessly a few dozen feet above me. While I fell on my ass again due to the recoil, I, once again, had cheated death. That is, until another mortar round, which I couldn't see this time due to the lingering shockwave produced by my previous shot, landed nearby. I was sent flying several feet away, and I lost consciousness upon hitting the ground.

* * *

Some time later, I awoke. I slowly opened my eyes, rubbing my head, which, oddly enough, was not hurting. Gunfire, screams of pain and agony, explosions... All had been replaced by birds chipping and the soothing sound of a soft and constant breathing. I was no longer in the middle of a wasteland, but inside Fluttershy's room. I had fallen off the fucking bed.  
For the first time in my life, I had fallen off a bed.  
Not cool.

Sighing with relief, but somehow unsurprised that this was a dream, I got up to my feet and looked at Fluttershy. She looked so peaceful, so... Cute. Or maybe something more than that. Did I really kiss her in my dream?  
I spent the last four or five years without ever having one single nightmare, and all of a sudden I had two on consecutive nights? This can't be a coincidence. Something bad was going on. A shitstorm of biblical proportions was brewing.  
I recalled Twilight saying something about telepathy or something, when I first asked her what kind of powers I could possibly have. Maybe those were... visions? I sure as hell hoped not.

Brushing off those thoughts, I walked downstairs and started making breakfast, which I promptly brought back upstairs. I gently brushed Fluttershy's cheek with the back of my hand to wake her up.

"Hey there, sleeping beauty." I giggled.

She blushed, and smiled at me. "Oh, you're so kind! You didn't have to do that, you know. How nice of you!" she squeed, and I struggled to fight the urge of simply kissing her, this time for real. In a way that I definitely shouldn't be kissing a cartoon pony.

We sat for about half an hour, eating and talking. I had purposely made way more food than I should have had, just so I could finish hers, but my plan backfired. She ate all of it and even asked me if I was gonna finish mine, since I was frozen in shock at the sight of her empty plate, despite knowing I had put more on it than even I would have fancied to eat on a normal day...

So now not only was I -not- gonna lose weight, but Fluttershy was gonna get fat.  
Curses.

**_A/N: Sorry for the short chapter, I promise chapter 8 will be longer.  
Captain Netgraph is a 'tribute' to a friend of mine, who's fascinated by German weaponry, and bitches about lag whenever he loses in an online game. He also hates Derpy (why would anyone do? this is beyond me but well) so I just had to include him.  
Anyway this has been Nosfrat, and I'm out. Over.  
_**


	8. Heroes Of Our Time

**_A/N: Sorry for the long wait, I had many ideas, but ideas for parts that would come later into the story, and I really had trouble to come up with a smooth 'transition' from the current state of the story to said parts, but I'm happy with how it's gonna turn out now. I'm probably gonna change the 'genres' to romance / adventure, as many things are about to unfold. Maybe change the title, too, so it doesn't get too confusing... At first I wasn't even watching the show, and I had just wanted to make a My Little Dashie-like one-shot, and I soon found myself wanting to write more. Also I've been writing quite a lot of greentext stories lately (second person stories where each line begins with 'is greater than' (for some reason I can't type the character here), for those of you who aren't familiar with 4chan, /mlp/ and all that cancerous shit). Considering this, it was rather hard to go back to prose after writing over 70 KB of those. Anyway, enjoy this chapter._**

* * *

After a copious breakfast, we stayed in bed for a little while, enjoying each other's company.  
I spoke first.

"So... What should we do today?"

"Oh, I have several things to do today. I gotta go to the market and buy food, go see Rarity for a dress she said she would finish for today, and Rainbow Dash wants me to help her with some birds who keep getting into her home, and you know how I am with animals."

"Yes, I also know how she is..."

We both giggled, and went on with our morning routines. After about forty minutes we were both ready to go.

* * *

"Twenty bits." said the vendor. Both Fluttershy and I blinked, although I had no idea how much a bit was, it still sounded outrageous to me.

"Twenty bits for a cherry? Isn't that a little... Expensive?" inquired the shy pegasus.

"You're free to go somewhere else." the vendor answered, knowing that he was the only one with cherries around.

"But uh, I mean um... That pony just before me, you sold him twenty cherries for ten bits?"

"Supply and demand, honey. That's my last one." he said with a cocky grin.

I took a step forward and leaned on my elbows, my chin resting in the palms of my hands.

"I think this cherry is -not- worth twenty bits, now is it?" I said, looking as threatening as I could manage to.

"Um... Maybe not?" he said, now feeling less confident.

"Definitely not." I said, before standing up and motioning for Fluttershy to go ahead.

"How much for that cherry?" she asked shyly.

"Nineteen bits." the vendor said, grinning.

I sighed. Why did ponies have to be like people, making everything painfully complicated?

I looked at him while cracking my knuckles. "Try again." I said coldly.

"Um... Ten bits?" his voice was now shaking.

"One bit." I said confidently.

"One bit? One bit? Are you crazy? I can't sell my last cherry for one single bit! That would ruin the-"

Before he could finish I brought my fist down on the counter, crushing the cherry. I looked at my bloody-looking hand with satisfaction, and smiled at him.

"If you can't sell it for what it's worth, then you may not sell it at all."

I walked away, Fluttershy following me with a smile plastered on her face. The vendor was too shocked to complain about his now 'ruined' business.

"That was awesome, you sure showed him! Way to go!"

"I can't stand such peop... I mean, ponies. I was thinking things were different here but, it's actually pretty close to what I was used to back on Earth."

She looked at me and lowered her head.

"Yeah, um, lately it's been difficult, it seems that many ponies have become slightly irritable and selfish."

This wasn't sounding good. I decided to let it slip but I knew that soon enough I would be confronted to something big.  
The morning went on without major hiccups, that is until we got to Carousel Boutique. Fluttershy entered first and I followed her, carrying two heavy bags full of groceries.

"Oh darling, how are you?" an excited Rarity asked to the yellow pony.

"I'm fine, how about you?"

"Well, I just finished your dress. It was really hard work but I think the result is worth it."

By this point I was still wondering what she would need a dress for but I didn't want to ruin her mood, she seemed enthusiastic about this. She went upstairs and I waited downstairs for a while, wondering what they could be doing. Lost in my (now dirty) thoughts, I heard a piercing voice.

"Who are you?"

"Oh, hey Sweetie Belle. I'm, uh... A friend of Fluttershy's."

"How do you know my name?"

"Uh, I uh... She told me about it. I mean, your sister. I came here a few days ago for some new clothes and she told me about you." I lied.

"Oh, well it's nice to meet you. What are you?"

"I'm a... human. I'm not from here, I guess you have never seen anything like me."

"No I never did, but I'm glad I have now!"

I was somewhat shocked by how small she was compared to me, the top of her horn barely reaching my... Great, another dirty thought to brush off... I made a mental note of trying to relieve myself sometime later this day, this was becoming unbearable.

"Do you have a cutie mark?" she asked.

Part of me wanted to say 'yes', and explain her how I had gotten it despite the fact that humans do not have cutie marks, but I knew better than to talk about cutie marks to one of the Crusaders.

"No, humans do not have cutie marks."

She looked down in disappointment.

"But I have this." I said, sticking my tongue out. I don't know why I did this, as tongue piercings certainely didn't exist here in Equestria, and it wasn't particularly characteristic of a (especially male) human, but before I could think about it, she gave me a quizzical look.

"Um, you have a tongue? Is that, uh... any special for a human?"

I looked at my tongue and noticed that it was 'naked', and there was no trace of the hole either.

"What the f... hay?" I said out loud, almost screaming. "I used to... I mean... Ah, nevermind, nevermind all of this. I come from a place where some things are different and um, I'm having some trouble getting used to Eque... I mean Ponyville."

"Oh." she simply said, still looking at me. I brought my hand to my chin and stroked my short beard for a second, before realizing my lower lip piercing had disappeared as well, and there was no trace of it ever having existed. Sure enough, I closed my right eye and looked at my left nostril, no trace of the little silver ring either. Part of me wanted to ask Twilight or even the Princess what was up with all those peculiar changes, while another part of me wanted to try out various things and see how much I had changed 'physically'. I decided against either of those things though, as Fluttershy came back downstairs, wearing an absolutely stunning dress, reminiscent of nature and wildlife. I was actually stunned at how beautiful she was looking.

"Wow, Fluttershy, you're... Stunning." I managed to say.

She blushed hard and squeed. We walked out of the boutique after thanking Rarity, and started walking back to her cottage for lunch. All of a sudden, something moved in the bag I was carrying in my right hand. As I brought it to head level, Sweetie Belle's head popped out.

I almost screamed in surprise and staggered a few steps backwards.

"Sweetie Belle! Don't scare me like that! And what are you doing in my bag?"

"Well, I was writing something for the school's newspaper, and I... you know, there's a new species in Ponyville, it could be interesting to-"

"Hold it, hold it. I know what you mean but uh, how about I just go to school with you and show myself, instead of bothering you with writing? This way I could also answer anypony's questions, live."

Her eyes started to shine.

"That's an awesome idea! Almost as good as Scootaloo's idea of... Wait, I gotta introduce you to Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom, and-"

"Sweetie Belle, I'm new here. I know you're all being very friendly and I truly appreciate it but take it easy on me, alright? I hardly knew anypony where I used to live, so it's gonna take me a little while before I get used to having many new friends."

Fluttershy suddenly screamed.

"Oh no, I forgot! I had to go help Rainbow Dash!" she said, starting to panic.

"Hey don't worry it's still morning, you have plenty of time."

"But you can't come with me..."

"You'll be fine on your own for a few hours, you've been alone for years, you're not on Earth, you'll be fine."

"But... Things are changing recently..."

"Well, you'll be with Dashie anyway! She'll never let anything happen to you."

"I... I guess you're right. Well, I'll be back for lunch later. I'm so sorry!"

"Don't be, you're helping your friend, that's perfectly normal. Well, I think." I said, almost inaudibly on the last part.

She took off her dress, carefully handed it to me and took off. I waved her 'good bye' as I picked up the bags and started walking towards her cottage, when Sweetie Belle trotted up to me.

"What is this Earth you mentioned?"

"It's what the place I come from is called."

"Oh... Is it far? How is it?"

"It's... Very far. And very dark, more dangerous than even the Everfree Forest."

"Oh... Do you think I-"

"No, you would -not- get your cutie mark there."

She blinked twice, very fast.

"How did you know I was gonna say that?"

"You're one of the Crusaders, your, um... your sister told me. She told me about you guys and how you were doing anything you could to get your marks."

"We'll eventually succeed!"

"When the time is right, you will. You know in my life, I tried to rush a lot of things... Some of them did happen, but way too early, and it went awry. I won't give you a life lesson but while you're having fun trying to get your mark, trying too hard is futile and dangerous, you won't get it until the time is right."

She put on a face that basically said 'yeah right, I'll show you'.

"What can you... humans? Humans, right?"

"Yes."

"What can humans do? Can you do magic? Fly? Are you particularly strong? Can you... Something special? Anything?"

"Well um, no, but I mean, maybe. It seems that coming to Eq... Ponyville, gave me a boost in physical strength. I'm good with ice, too." God that sounded horrible. 'Good with ice'? Did I really say that? For real?

"What do you mean? Do you make ice sculptures?"

"No, I... Let me show you."

I walked to a nearby bush and touched a leaf. I concentrated as much as I could. A few droplets of dew materialized on top of the leaf, before dropping to the ground. I closed my eyes and frowned, trying harder. My blood vessels were showing, and they were pumping hard from such 'mental' concentration. Another few droplets appeared on the leaf, this time turning into ice before they could fall off. I let out the breath I hadn't even realized I was holding, and sighed heavily.

"Well I'm not -that- good, but I couldn't do that a few days ago."

"That's... strange." she said, looking like she had never seen anything like that before. "How do you do it? You have no horn or anything, do you?"

Fighting the urge of showing her my junk and laughing at my 'joke', I told her the truth. "I don't really know, it seems like being in Ponyville granted me some special abilities that I didn't have back home."

"You should try to practice! Maybe you can make a snowman! That'd be awesome!"

"Maybe... With years of practice. I should actually go see Twilight at the library, maybe she could help me with that."

"That's a great idea! I'll come with you! Maybe I can get my cutie mark in reading?"

Oh God, not this shit again... I sighed and entered Fluttershy's cottage, but not before getting rid of the frozen leaf that I had now realized was in her own garden.

"Sweetie Belle, maybe you should go home? Isn't Rarity going to worry about you?"

"No, I told her I was meeting up with Apple Bloom so I could follow you."

I wanted to ask her how and when the hell she had jumped into my bags but deep inside I had the feeling that the answer to such a thing would be like dividing by zero.

Suddenly I heard some noise outside. I walked up to the door, hoping that I wouldn't be greeted with severed limbs flying, Pinkamena with a katana, or trip over an assault rifle, and I opened it.  
Several pegasi were circling around high up in the sky, screaming at each other. I could see Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy along with three others, one of them was brown-coated and looked larger than the others.

I couldn't quite make out what they were saying due to the distance but I was pretty sure Fluttershy and Dash were in trouble.

"Get down here!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, hoping they would hear me.

A cyan blur started racing towards me, followed by a less blurry and much, much slower Fluttershy. The large brown pegasus caught up with Dash and did something that looked like the flying equivalent of a dropkick. She started spinning uncontrollably, still falling at speeds that I estimated sufficient for a potential Sonic Rainboom. My heart started to race, and sweat formed on my brow. What the fuck was I gonna do? Catch her? Considering her speed, the violence of the impact would be probably equivalent to a head-on collision with a semi-truck. I knew that I was stronger than before here, but this was suicide. I was shuffling, wondering what I could do when a few snowflakes fell to the ground. I didn't even lift my head, knowing that I was the one who had 'created' them. I focused as much as I could and managed to cast a thin layer of powder snow in a small radius around me.

That wouldn't do anything to soften such a violent crash. I focused even harder, the snow now reaching knee-height in a five square feet radius. I opened my eyes and saw Rainbow a few dozen feet away from me. With the extreme speed at which she was traveling, she'd hit me before I could move out of the way. I opened my arms and braced myself, half-ready to catch her and half-ready to die.

I instinctively jumped backwards at the very last moment, and she crashed violently against my belly. We were both sent flying a few feet backwards, landing softly on the snow, unharmed. She had knocked the wind out of me but I was alright, and so was she. I knew I was far stronger than I would ever have thought possible now, but I didn't quite understand how -she- could have survived that. Especially considering she had knocked herself out flying into me a few days earlier, at speeds that wouldn't even begin to compare with this... I got up and looked at her.

"You... you saved me." she said, apparently having trouble admitting she couldn't handle herself.

"Don't mention it."

"It was awesome, how you made all that snow appear and all! Is this like, magic?"

"I honestly don't know, I was planning on going to see Twilight to ask her. It seems to appear uncontrollably when I'm scared or angry, not unlike a baby unicorn's magic, from what I've heard."

"Oh. Did you have this power back where you come from?"

"No, I guess my body needs some time to learn and control it."

"I guess so, well anyway I have stuff to do. You're pretty cool, you know?"

"Thanks, Rainbow. Well I'll see you around then."

Fluttershy, who I had almost forgotten about, landed near me. She hugged me tighly.

"You saved her! You're a hero!"

"Um... Thank you?"

As retarded as it sounded, I honestly wasn't used to so much recognition for anything I had ever done. I was feeling happy, but quite uncomfortable. I returned the hug and kissed her on the top of the head, when I saw the brown pegasus from earlier landing nearby. I cracked my neckbones and walked up to him. He was about to shit his teeth, I was going to make sure of that.

He walked up to Fluttershy, totally ignoring me. I stopped dead in my tracks and turned around. He spoke angrily.

"I'm not through with you... Fluttershy."

He spat out her name, as if it were poisonous.

"Your little blue friend saved you but she's gone now, and this time you-"

"No." I said, kneeling down and putting a hand on his 'shoulder' to shut him up.

"Wow, what, and who the buck are you?"

"I'm a human, and I'll be either your demise or your worst nightmare, depending on how much of a fight you put up."

"What? Oh you think you can take me on? Look at me, I'm an athlete! I'm even faster than Rainbow Crash! And you? You look all... Fat."

I hadn't gotten pissed at being called fat since nearly ten years, but in this situation...  
I grabbed his mane and yanked him forward, his head hitting the snow violently. I kept him in place for several seconds, and jerked his head back up, his face now covered in snow and grass. He gasped for air.

"Alright, I'm going to rephrase that so your very simple brain can process and understand it. Get. Out. Of. Here. While you still can."

Still holding him firmly, I narrowed my eyes on him and a very thin layer of ice began to form on his wings.

"I'm... I..." he didn't finish his 'sentence' and flew away as fast as he could, the first flap of his wing sending nearly all the snow flying around.

Fluttershy was looking at me, her eyes shining with... something. I couldn't tell, I had never seen anything like this in the eyes of someone staring at me before. As I watched her walking into her house without saying a word, I couldn't shake off the thought that something really, really bad was going to happen. Way too many catastrophes had happened in a few days and it was only getting worse. It was only a matter of time before a war or something broke out.  
I definitely had to go see Twilight.

'Trapped Under Ice' was the only thing on my mind while I stood outside, still somewhat fascinated by this whole ice and snow thing, until Sweetie Belle yanked my jeans. I swore I could hear her saying 'dumb fabric'. Actually I had totally forgotten about her as well.  
I wish I had music to listen to, I'm so missing that...

"That was awesome! Maybe you earned your cutie mark from saving Rainbow Dash!"

Not. This. Shit. AGAIN.

"Sweetie I told you, humans don't have cutie marks."

"You can't be sure about that! Just take a look at it! Please? Please! Please please please pl-"

"Alright alright, alright! Just... Just shut up, seriously."

I couldn't believe how annoying her voice was. Cute, but so damn annoying. I was about to take off my jeans when I realized I was basically going to get naked in front of a 'schoolfilly'. Holy shit I felt awful. And good at the same time.  
And I wanted to laugh, hard.

"Oh my... You have a cutie mark! Yippee!" she screamed and jumped into the air. I sighed and frowned, realizing my icicle had gotten brighter and much larger than what I remembered.

Before she could say anything, I looked at her and said sternly. "It won't work for you, you're a pony. Ponies get their cutie marks when the time is right, not when... I don't know, but don't try to be a hero and risk your life for a cutie mark."

Her face dropped and she lowered her ears. "I understand, but it's hard to wait."

"I know, but don't you remember what your friends once said? You could be anything, all the possibilities, the thrill of not knowing what you'll be! Isn't it worth a little waiting? Besides, if you need to wait longer than the others, it probably means you're meant to be really special."

"Maybe you're right... But... How can you know my friends said that?"

Shit. Shit, shit, shit, double shit, fucking shits of a thousand shits.

"Uh... Rarity told me, she told me a lot about you, and how... um, cool, your friends are."

"Really? Sometimes I think I annoy her..."

Thanks fuck these ponies were so gullible.

"Nah, it's just... You're young, she's very serious with her work. You can get on her nerves sometimes, but she truly loves you."

"Are you sure?"

"I am sure."

She hugged me. It was too damn cute.

"Well I think you could eat something with us, come in." I motioned for her to follow me inside.

Fluttershy greeted her and me, and hugged me again, though she still didn't say a word. We sat awkwardly and ate.

The rest of the day went by slowly, but without other doozies. I told Fluttershy and Sweetie Belle about Earth, my childhood, how things worked, though I tried my best to let Sweetie Belle think that it was a faraway place rather than another planet in a different dimension. The filly went home before dinner, and soon it was time to go to bed.

As usual I slipped under the covers and cuddled against Fluttershy, who wrapped her hooves around me. She couldn't even reach my sides but it was too cute to see her try. I pulled her closer in a tight hug and fell asleep with my chin resting on her mane, and her snout nuzzling against my chest.

This, -this-, was bliss. True happiness. I felt... complete. Whatever was happening between this pony and me, it was making me feel good.  
But I had enough experience in life to know that good things never came without their share of shit, and I would later wish I had known how right I was... Until then I would just enjoy the soft yellow fur and pink hair brushing against me.

* * *

_**N/A: Many, many things are gonna go down in the next chapters. I have no intention of ending this story anytime soon as I have a lot planned. Hope you all enjoy it so far, I'm sorry if I drift a little far away from the plot and include trivial or even useless, boring shit but writing is relieving to me, and well, as far as I can tell it's not blatant either.**_  
_**I'm just gonna give one little 'hint' as to what might happen later on, and this hint is a simple sentence:**_

**"Well, I'll be lying when I say..."**

_**Nosfrat, out.**_


	9. Reasons To Live

**_A/N: I know I'm often switching between past and present tenses but I think the transitions are smooth enough and it shouldn't be hindering for the reader. At least I hope so...  
Read the other A/N at the end of the chapter for some extra information on a few things, the rest will be covered in chapter 10, which I already have written for the most part._**

* * *

Another morning, another... Wait a minute. I open my eyes, rub them with my hands and take a look around me.  
Where am I? Where's Fluttershy? Where's... Where's the damn thing?  
Wait, what thing? What's going on?

I'm in my room, on Earth. It's still dark outside. I take a quick glance at the clock, 2:50 AM.

What Celestia said if I chose not to go to Equestria... She would warp me back in time before I could encounter Fluttershy... But she would have erased any memory of everything as well, right? And I sure as hell wouldn't have any memories of Equestria since I wouldn't have been there in the first place.  
Was it all a dream? Was I currently dreaming?

I get up, because after whatever this was, there wass no way I was gonna fall back asleep, and I put on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt. However something catches my attention: my 'cutie mark' is still here. I walk into the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror: shorter hair, purple locks, no piercings.  
This has to be yet another dream... It just has to. Lucid dreaming? Can I control anything?

Let's see.

After putting on a pair of shoes and grabbing my keys, I walk down the stairs and open the double glass doors, only to be greeted with... apocalypse. The houses and buildings nearby are completely ruined, smashed and torn to pieces. Whatever is left of them is on fire, thick smoke and ashes fill the air, and the sky is a mix of gray and dark orange, almost red-ish with small particles of fire.

No sounds, other than the crackling of the burning inferno consuming what's left of the city, which at first glance isn't much. No gunfire, no distant explosions, no giant rampaging monster, no mushroom cloud in the distance, no sign of a natural disaster... I just keep on walking around, mesmerized by the sight of such a post-apocalyptic wasteland instead of the place I used to live in for nearly twenty-three years. Sure I hated this place, sure I hated the people living there, and sure I wished more than once that I could exterminate them all, but... Never would I have wished for -this-.  
I narrowly avoid burning debris falling from the sky and take a turn to the right. Might as well check on other things, whatever happened here must have had a large-scale impact on the country... or even the world?

After walking for a few hundred yards, I arrive near the river. I can't help but feel like something is off. Very off. The water is still flowing, has retained its ugly green-ish color, and stinks as usual. You would think that it would be filled with ashes, debris and such, but no, it looks totally 'normal'. As normal as a stream of sewer water and various polluted wastes can look.  
I'm about to walk away when I see something on the other side of the river. Something yellow and pink, and screaming for help.

Well, not screaming, but whispering a little louder than usual. She seems to be sitting on a log, slowly drifting along with the current. I don't know if she can swim but I can. Without hesitating, I walk down the stairs leading to the narrow, rocky pathway bordering the riverbed and dive into the disgusting water. I nearly gag at the thought, and I -do- gag at the smell, but I have to keep going and rescue her. Thankfully I've always been a good swimmer, and I have no trouble reaching her.

"Get on my back, I'll get you back on solid ground!"

I don't need to ask her twice, she jumps on my back and I make my way back to the 'shore', trying my best not to get her wet.

She must be wounded if she couldn't fly to safety. Or scared off her mind...  
Too busy trying to keep my head out of the filthy water, I don't notice the large log heading my way. It hits me in the back of the head and nearly knocks me out. I stop moving for a short moment, letting myself drown a few feet underwater before regaining my composure and swimming back to the surface. I open my eyes and painfully realize that I lost my glasses.  
I can't see shit.

"Fluttershy! Where are you?"

Even if she answers, there is no way I can hear her over the thundering sound of the flowing water. The current is getting stronger every second and I'm starting to lose control. I have mud and probably human waste in my eyes, no glasses, my clothes are completely drenched and heavier than usual, impeding my movement and on top of it my head is still spinning from the pain caused by the log.

"Wherever you are, you must get to safety! Get to the shore, stay away from fire and... And from any human you might encounter! Do not come back for me, I'll be okay... Just save yourself, Flutty! I... I love you!"

Those were my last words as I felt the water that was supporting my body disappear. Before I could even start to analyze the fact that a three hundred feet high waterfall had magically appeared in the middle of my now destroyed town, I hit the water below.

* * *

Or, water hit me from above.

I woke up, panting and half-screaming, next to a scared Fluttershy holding an empty water bucket.  
Trying to make up my surroundings, I realized that I was in her bed, in her cottage, and she had just thrown a fucking bucket of water at me.

"Fluttershy? What... What happened?"

"You were moving violently and screaming and... I was scared, I thought you were having a bad dream but I couldn't wake you up by talking to you, and you nearly hit me by flailing your arms around so, I had to... you know..." she says shyly, then motions to the empty bucket.

"Oh... No no, that's, that's quite alright. Thanks for... saving me."

Wait, I was screaming in my sleep? Did she hear anything I said? Did I even -say- anything intelligible?

"Fluttershy, in my dream I vaguely remember saying something, did I say something in my sleep?"

"I think so, but I couldn't make out what it was. It sounded like you were talking to someone..."

"Oh... Well I don't remember anything else, I just remember that I was saying something." I lied, relieved to know that she didn't hear me saying such a... thing. Did I even 'love' her?  
This was ridiculous.

It was still night but I couldn't sleep anymore so I decided to just go and grab some breakfast. I laid back in bed and ate breakfast with my 'savior'. I was starting to enjoy having breakfast, actually.  
But, all those nightmares... Something was wrong, and I was going to find out what.

"Fluttershy, I must tell you something. I was indeed having a bad dream. A very bad one. I haven't had any nightmares in the past five years or so, and so far I spent three nights in Equestria, and I had three disturbing, gruesome nightmares. I must go see Twilight, there must be an explanation. It can't be homesickness or some other bull- I mean, something else, it must be... All those things that have been happening lately in Equestria, and now this? I'm no psychic but I can definitely sense something is going on. This feels way too familiar."

As she let my words sink into her, she cocked her head slightly to the right and asked: "What's a psychic?"

"Uh... Well, on Earth, magic doesn't exist, psychics are people who pretend they can sense things, kind of like Pinkie Pie's Pinkie sense, but they are considered fakes by most people. Mind-reading, telepathy, telekinesis... Those people pretend they have such powers, but they don't. There's a scientific explanation to just about everything on Earth. But it's not important anyway, I'm just gonna wait for morning, and then I'll go see Twilight at the library. If anyone can answer my questions, it'll be her. You don't have to come with me, if you don't want to, it will probably be long and boring. And the results might be... unsettling."

"I want to come with you, I... I love being with you."

"Me too, Fluttershy. Me too."

The Sun was soon coming up, and we were back to chit-chatting and laughing together. We had almost nothing in common but we always managed to find things to talk about, it felt magical.

A few hours later I was knocking at the library's door, but my fist met air as Twilight opened the door before I could land the first knock. I silently laughed at the fact that I would have punched her in the face if she had been human-sized.

"Hello Twilight, listen, I don't think I have much time, I need to talk to you. You know, recently I've been having those nightmares and I-"

I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw her wince and drop her gaze to the ground at the word 'nightmare'.

"Wait a minute... You know about this, don't you?"

"I... I do. You see, I've been keeping the portal open. I figured it would be a great way to learn more about your world, your technology is absolutely mind-blowing, but I didn't think of the potential side-effects back then... Next thing I knew, keeping it open had been wearing me down to the point I couldn't muster the strength to close it anymore. And Princess Celestia has been helping me keeping it open and studying your world."

"What the... How could you be so... How could you do that? And why didn't she close it?"

"She tried to, but it was too late. She said I made a big mistake, and she couldn't reverse what I had done. She had to give you those nightmares to prepare you for... Um..."

"To prepare me for? For what?"

"Well, um... You see, your homeland and Equestria are very different and-"

"You don't fucking say."

"Language!"

"Hey, don't give me that shit anymore, you're trying to tell me that by letting that portal open, you allowed negative energy and hate emanating from Earth to come and linger here in Equestria, wreaking havoc and changing ponies' behavior... And unable to reverse the effects, you then, with the help of your mentor, purposely gave me nightmares to mentally prepare me to face whatever's gonna happen, because obviously I'm gonna be the one who's gonna have to try and correct your fuck-up, and you're giving me shit about my language?"

"How... How did... I didn't say anything! How could you know that?"

"Just figured, since you act first, then think second... I had time to think about such things during the aftermath of those dreams, while basking in realization that they were just that, dreams. I always knew something was up, I could feel it... I initially wanted to come see you earlier, especially since I had noticed the change in behavior and such but I didn't want to feel like... You know, maybe it could have been homesickness, or I could have been really paranoid, a lot of things could have caused me to feel like something was off and I didn't want to scare or bother anypony. But three nights in a row? I just couldn't take it anymore. And even then, when I was younger and did have nightmares every now and then, I didn't exactly dream of waking up in war-torn wastelands appearing out of nowhere, while having super powers and narrowly escaping death every time."

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry... Princess Celestia said that you were the only hope, you know how things work on Earth, you had to be trained somehow to face the direst situations so hopefully you will be ready to truly face them when they happen."

"Wait... Because those things I dreamed of, are actually going to happen?"

"No, not... Not exactly the same, but... Close. Similar things, I think."

By this point I wasn't even trying to understand anymore.

"Do you even know what I dreamed of?"

"No, but Princess Celestia said that the first nightmare was meant to test out your resolve and determination, and it showed that you could be proficient in combat, think before acting and were not be a mindless killer."

"And you really needed to give me a fucking nightmare to figure that one out?"

"Yes."

I was amazed by how blunt she was being.

"I don't exactly act the same in my dreams, as I would in real life you know..."

"Princess Celestia said that she took care of such trivial things."

"Trivial things? You know what, nevermind."

I was starting to get really pissed. She knew everything since day one, it was all her fault and I was gonna be the one to pay for it?

"And the second nightmare? What was it meant to test? Prove? Whatever?"

She levitated a scroll from her desk and took a quick look at it.

"Your ability to react to swift and brutal turns of events that can deeply affect you emotionally and physically, as well as your ability to maintain  
sanity and rational thoughts under extreme pressure and the fear of death. Or something... I think."

"Oh, great. You're not even sure. I saved Derpy from certain death, sniped a bunch of soldier ponies, and that's supposed to test my ability to remain calm under pressure."

Suddenly the way humans were taught things on Earth wasn't sounding so retarded to me anymore compared to -that-. However her ears and eyes perked up at what I said.

"You... You saved Derpy?"

"Like hell I was gonna let some reckless commander shoot her... I think I might need to have a word with the princess. Don't take it wrong Twilight but, after all of this, I have quite a bit of trouble trusting you."

"You will have to, since you're now aware of the whole thing, the nightmares won't work anymore. You will have to attend to a meeting with every high-ranking military leader of Equestria in the next few hours. Your training has been cut short but I know you can do it."

"You don't even know me, Twilight. Besides, you didn't tell me what the point of the third dream was."

"Your ability to... make a difficult choice. Sacrificing yourself."

"Wait wait, you'd actually want me to-"

"NO!"

She screamed at the top of her lungs before knocking me back with a powerful magic beam. I managed to keep my balance but holy shit this hurt, I was shaking for several seconds and when I came back to my senses, I could still feel a violent surge of energy racing through my veins. I shook my head and frowned.

"What the fuck was that for?"

"I'm sorry, I... I knew what you were going to say, and I just can't hear that. I don't want you to think that I would ever consider using you as bait, or some sort of cannon fodder. It would hurt me too much to hear it. It's just, we haven't had an actual war here in Equestria in over a millenium, I read about warfare, and also human warfare, and we just... We just have to be ready for whatever is going to happen."

"Oh because now, you -know- a war is going to break out?"

"Actually... A few others of your kind have discovered the portal. It's not a thing you can touch or you can see, but they somehow... feel it, they are subconsciously aware that it exists. And they're sending all kinds of negative emotions through it: hate, fear, anger, greed... All these things are affecting us ponies, and every creature who lived peacefully in Equestria for so long."

"And what does that have to do with a war?"

"As long as those humans keep feeding the portal with their emotions, we cannot close it. We figured the only way to put an end to all of this would be to bring said humans to Equestria, and no one knows what will happen then, but according to my studies on your species, war is the likely answer."

"Well you finally got something right."

"There's something else I have to... tell you."

"Oh my God... what now?"

"Well, over a decade has passed on Earth. Humans have developed far more advanced technology in about every domain, and warfare is no exception. I think it's year 2025 on Earth."

"This keeps getting better, now we're gonna have humans going Black Ops II on our asses in real life. If you count Equestria as real life, that is."

"It's not that much better, I don't know what this... black ops thing, you're talking about... I don't know what it is, but it might not be as good as you think."

She seemed totally unable to grasp the concept of sarcasm. I nearly facepalmed.

"Forget about that. Can we go see the princess? Like, now? Whatever you guys might have been studying, I know a whole lot more than any of you, and if a war is really gonna break out, you're really, truly going to need me."

"We will probably win, you know... We have one thing they don't have."

"What's that?"

"Magic."

"Magic? But I can use magic too, here... You remember what you said when I first arrived here? Well, I assume those ice-related powers are some kind of magic, aren't they?"

"Not really, they're just manifestations of your inner powers."

"My inner powers? What are you talking about now?"

"I'm not sure, it seems like humans have powers vaguely related to magic, depending on their element. But since those things do not exist on Earth, no human apart from you has ever experienced them. Being in Equestria allows them to manifest themselves, but it behaves like a young unicorn's magic. It will go off by itself during times of need, when you're scared, when you're angry... But you will never have total control over it, and it will take years to even create a snowflake by yourself out of sheer determination."

"Years to create a snowflake? Mind explaining me how I managed to completely freeze a leaf by touching it and simply concentrating then?"

"You... you did?"

"I did. I also saved Rainbow Dash by casting a two-feet thick blanket of snow on the ground in a few feet radius around me."

"You... Two feet thick? How is that... We must go see Princess Celestia, now."

"Wait, wait. You said something about... elements?"

"Yes, your element is obviously ice. Other humans might have powers representing various elements, it seems."

"This sounds like Pokémon or some shit."

"What does that... Wait, actually nevermind, it doesn't matter. We're running late, and we're-"

She was interrupted by Spike kicking the door open, and holding a scroll.

"Thank you, Spike."

"You... You should really read this now, Twilight."

"Yes, I will."

I suddenly realized I hadn't met him yet. But now wasn't the time for that. And I never really liked him anyway.

"I guess I cannot go back on Earth myself and... get some weaponry and such?"

"You could, but it would only make things worse. Plus I'm not sure I would have enough strength left to send you back, let alone bring you back again."

"Ah hell... Fluttershy, we're going to Canterlot, you're coming? Fluttershy?"

I realized that I hadn't seen her since I entered the library. I know that she was behind me when I opened the door and since she's always quiet, I assumed she had been following me inside.

"Where is she?" I asked to no one in particular, starting to panic.

"I'm sorry but we don't have time, we must go now."

She made me follow her upstairs and jump into a carriage sent by the princess. The pegasi dragging it struggled to take off, as I was weighing probably as much as four or five ponies by myself, but they ended up managing to take off and fly to Canterlot. It actually looked beautiful, the scenery, the medieval feel to it...  
I was about to comment on how beautiful the castle when the carriage landed. I jumped off and followed Twilight to the throne room. This was truly beautiful. Not as tall as I thought it would be but definitely a sight to behold.

Celestia was waiting for us, and without a word she motioned for us to follow her into a more secluded room. It looked like a war room, blueprints and blackboards everywhere, lots of complicated shit written and drawn all over the place, unicorns levitating scrolls and moving stuff, and rows of what looked like alien electronic machines, the kind of futuristic stuff you would see in a low-budget 50's sci-fi movie.

"Welcome to Canterlot, Axel. First and foremost, I want to apologize for everything. But you know that already."

"Yes..."

"As you may know, we are planning on transporting all the humans who are currently aware of the portal into Equestria sometime tomorrow. We may have to do it earlier, as time flies on Earth. By the time we can transport them here, it will be close to year 2030. They will have gathered lots of people and developed even more astounding technology, which leads me to my main concern... What you call 'the army' are the people who constitute the vast majority of humans interested in the portal. They haven't found it, for it is not something you can see or touch, but they're aware of it. They are preparing for whatever may happen. It seems like the human mind reacts strangely to magical energy. They will be ready soon. Actually, with the rate at which time passes on Earth, they are already more than ready as we speak, and several dozens of them are joining each other and uniting their respective military forces every second. Therefore we must get ready too, and in short order."

"Princess, if I may..."

Twilight Sparkle took a step forward, stood on her hind legs and whispered something in the princess' ear. It looked suggestive from where I was, and I let out a small chuckle at the fact I was still managing to have dirty thoughts in such situations. The princess' face displayed a lot of emotions at once, and she stood up once Twilight had finished whispering to her.

"Snow? By himself? Are you sure? Well... Maybe not all is lost then."

She turned her gaze back to me.

"You are going to experience something quite unpleasant in a few seconds. I'm sorry, but it's necessary."

Before I could react or object to what she had just said, thousands of thoughts started to flood my mind. I tried to focus on one of them at random, and I suddenly could remember something, a distant memory... I blacked out and fell backwards after a few seconds, my head hitting a thin layer of snow.

* * *

**_A/N: If I wasn't following my 'name every chapter after a DragonForce song' I'd have called this one 'Shit Gets Real' or something. Also I finally reveal my name, for the sake of having a name. Also when I say 'weighing as much as four to five ponies', I know real life ponies weigh a lot more than even morbidly obese humans but according to their size in the show, and their ability to run, jump around and all, I figured they'd be pretty lightweight and I estimated them to weigh roughly 50-60 pounds._**


	10. Avant La Tempête

**_A/N: I didn't mention it before but this whole story, like most other MLP stories out there, takes place during season 3, before the finale._**  
**_Alicorn Twilight? Yeah, no._**  
**_It also means that while I did mention that I had stopped somewhere in the middle of season 2 during chapter 4, I have since then finished watching all three seasons, and I found high potential in many characters introduced later on, especially in the second half of season 2._**  
**_Not much to say about this chapter either except that the title -is- the name of a DragonForce song, and would translate to '(Calm) Before The Storm'._**  
**_And yes I know, nothing makes much sense anymore and it's all becoming a big unrealistic Call of Duty-like clusterfuck and, quoting Activision (not that I have any esteem for these greedy assholes) 'built on 'holy shit' moments' but first, this is a fan_****fiction****_, and second, well, I will simply quote Duke Nukem:_**  
**_'Hmm, messy... I like it.'_**  
**_I just have the need to write action scenes these days. But don't worry though, once the storm is past... You'll see._**  
**_Shit will get more and more real until it's so real it can't really get any more real anymore. Or something._**

* * *

A few years ago, I was fighting in Afghanistan. I was left alone, on my own, trying to reach an extraction point and meet up with the rest of my improvised squad. A corrupt General had gone rogue, betraying his men and his nation. In a desperate and suicidal attempt to take him out, I was all alone, in a war-torn airplane scrapyard, shooting my way through elite troops of crooked soldiers and mercenaries, hoping that the sand and rocks, stained with thousands of years of warfare, would remember me. I knew I was close to the end, it felt like some kind of freedom...  
And then I heard them. Through the radio communications. I remember it like it was yesterday, which, thinking back of it, was the only easy day.

"Makarov, you ever heard the old saying... The enemy of my enemy, is my friend?"

I ducked behind a plne wing, the metal blocking the burst of 7.62mm fury aimed my way. My ears were ringing from the gunfire, and I could only hear the following:

"He's using Site Hotel Bravo, you know where that is. I'll see you in Hell."

"Looking forward to it."

In Hell. Well, I was already there, by the looks of it. Planes falling from the sky, wrecks burning and bullets whistling everywhere. I peeked around a corner, looking down the scope of my CheyTac Intervention anti-matériel sniper rifle, ready to fire, only to see an armored monster running at me, his M240 light machine gun starting to tear through the plane wing I was hiding behind. I was doomed, he was too heavily armored to be taken down in one shot, and by the time I could cycle the bolt, his bullet hose would have sprayed another fifteen bullets into whatever cover I had left, and probably into my unarmored body. Accepting my inevitable fate, but still not ready to go down without a fight, I took aim, and fired.  
Everything went black.

I threw my headset across the room, let go of my mouse and sighed. It was time to buy a new PC.

But through this endeavor, I figured that when everything has gone to shit, and your own people have failed to help, you could always resort to... asking your enemies for help.  
As I was starting to think about what potential villains I could ask for help, I was awoken by Celestia gently rubbing my head with a hoof.

"Princess, I... I had a vision."

"I know, I caused it to happen."

"Why? Why do you -all- have to fuck with my mind?"

"Because you're the only one who can help us, and you need us to help you realize it, in order to be able to help us."

Mind successfully fucked, once again.

"You're not shocked by my language?"

"I wouldn't say that it pleases me, but there are far more important matters at hoof. You must tell me about your vision."

"Alright, so basically I-"

"No, no, I know exactly what you saw, but... I cannot understand any of it. I must know what you thought about it, what it meant to you. I woke you up so you could think about it while awake and conscious, the vision was just meant to give you a potential idea. Any pondering over this idea must be done when you are in full control of your mind."

"Uh... Okay. So, assuming what I saw was really meant to give me ideas, and assuming my word means shit around here... We must ask our enemies for help."

"Our enemies?"

"Our enemies. I don't know if we'll be outnumbered, or outgunned, or whatever you want to call it since we won't have actual weapons, but in a war you don't want to take any chances. We must rally our enemies to our cause, especially the powerful and dangerous ones."

"I can understand your reasoning, but how, and why, would they agree to it?"

"Because humans are now our common enemies. The enemy of my enemy..."

"...is my friend. That's what you said a few times during your vision."

"Was I talking?"

"I was reading your mind."

"Princess... I really don't think you want to be reading my mind anymore, because you'll end up being scarred for life. As an immortal entity, it would probably suck..."

I was a little bit annoyed and scared by her mind-reading capabilities but she let out a small chuckle, apparently amused by my actually serious 'joke'. I took it as a hint to continue.

"Anyway as I was saying, humans threaten Equestria as a whole. While our, I mean your land... I mean, our? Your? Whatever, those enemies, it is their land too. While we don't get along with them, we live in the same land. And if this very land is threatened... we must unite and defeat the threat, together."

"Your leadership is impressive."

"Not on Earth it isn't. I mean, this is just common sense... As dumb as humans can get, we're not gonna outsmart them, and their experience in warfare far exceeds anything you could ever imagine. Hell I'm surprised by 2025 World War III hasn't broken out yet."

"I understand... Then I suppose we have no choice. We must gather everypony, and train them in record time."

"Pretty much. Princess, wouldn't you happen to know where Fluttershy is?"

"She's in the gym."

"The... Gym?"

"She has started her high-speed intensive training with Equestria's most effective coach. While you were discussing important matters with Twilight Sparkle, I had my royal guards bring her here. She wasn't exactly happy about it but we don't have a choice, I hope you'll understand."

"What's she training for?"

"I had this idea in mind since quite some time now... I figured that since you are much larger and heavier than a pony, which impedes your running speed as well as your stamina, and you cannot fly nor teleport, you will need a way to get around quickly. Fluttershy and you seem to be getting along pretty well, to the point some of your thoughts might be synchronized."

Did she just call me fat?  
Mental note number sixty-nine: bitch-slap Celestia once this whole ordeal is over.

"Synchronized?"

"Right now, she is being trained by Iron Will, and with some help from Princess Luna and Princess Cadence, she should be able to carry you around tomorrow."

"Carry me around?"

"Fluttershy must be your... ride. You trust each other, and that will make you even more powerful. Speaking of which, since you seem to have a natural gift with your control over your element, Princess Luna will be giving you a special artifact to assist you in controlling it."

"A special artifact? This is starting to sound like I'm in some weird anime movie or some shit... Am I truly awake right now?"

"Yes, you are. But let's not waste any more time than we already did. Who do you think we could ask for help?"

"I thought about Discord, and Queen Chrysalis."

Her eyes widened.

"Discord... I will definitely ask him, as he is the single most powerful entity in the history of Equestria. His magic isn't that much more powerful than a regular alicorn's but unlike us, he doesn't feel fatigue when using it repeatedly, and according to the information I gathered, wars can last a very long time."

"Yep, that's what I thought, he can just snap his fingers and bend reality."

"Promise me one thing."

"Yes Princess?"

"If we make it and live through this... You will tell me how you know so much about us, and about this land."

"...Alright, I promise I will."

"Good, now what were you saying? Queen Chrysalis?"

Her eyes narrowed this time, I could tell she wasn't liking that suggestion one bit.

"Don't ask me, at least not yet, how I know that, but she was able to overpower you and knock you out. As long as she has a steady source of power she should be near invincible."

"We're not gonna convince her to help us. Changelings need love to feed on, however they also-"

"I know, I know, this would be unpractical but... I thought about that, it's probably stupid but, what if Changelings could actually feed off hate?"

"They can. They can feed off many different emotions. But none of them is really efficient compared to love. Where are you going with this?"

"Humans, soldiers in particular, are hatred incarnate. They must be, at least in time of war. If Queen Chrysalis can feed off the hate coming from an entire army of bloodthirsty humans, she'll be more powerful than ever."

"I'm really not sure about this. It sounds foolish and awfully risky to me."

"Discord isn't all that reliable either from what I saw so far, and war is chaos in its purest form. We need a contingency plan ready to go in case he just can't resist playing along and wreaks havoc once again."

"And we need a contingency plan in case anything happens with Chrysalis, too."

"Which is why we need to gather as many creatures as we can and train them. Everypony will be given a specific task, a particular role to fulfill. With organization, synergy, and our access to magic, we should stand a chance even if something unexpected happens within our ranks."

"Alright... I will invite everypony to join us tonight for a reunion. Will you be our leader?"

"Leader? Wow, I... I'm not sure, I never really..."

"Even I have no experience in warfare the way you described it. You seem to know what you're talking about. You need to lead us to victory. If your plan works, everything should be fine. Especially with that little gift from my sister... She will bring it to you tonight. Just try not to have too much fun with it, and stay focused."

"Uh, okay. Alright, I'll be your leader. I will assign everypony to their tasks and lead them into battle... Though I hope we can scare them off or something, and not have to actually fight. We don't have firearms, do we?"

"No, but do not fear, Princess Cadence will cast special force fields around everypony that will deflect anything they can throw at us, while still letting us fire at them."

"Fire at them? With what?"

"Unicorns and alicorns can fire blasts of energy."

"Oh, you mean, that. Yeah I figured that out... But, can it actually kill or something?"

"It can. It's not meant to, but it can if used in a particular fashion. You will see when the time comes. I must go now, you should go check on Fluttershy and start thinking of what roles you want everypony to assume. We will meet by sunset, in this very room."

On these words, Celestia took off and flew away. I looked at Twilight, who had remained silent the whole time.

"What do you make of this?"

"I think we might have our chances. If you're as powerful as you said, and can ride Fluttershy into battle, we will prevail. I can sense a very strong bond between you two."

I blushed and she let out a small giggle.

"I don't wanna sound rude or anything but, is there anything to eat around here? If we have one day left before the city and everything around it turns into a battlefield, I'd like to spend this day enjoying simple things in life... while I still can."

"Don't be negative, you'll fail us if you are. Come with me, the kitchens are full of things you will love. Speaking of love, the princess might be able to get Queen Chrysalis to attend the meeting tonight but... You will have to be the one to go and convince her."

"Don't worry, I know just how to convince her. It's gonna be as easy as it can possibly get."

Even with the knowledge that I wouldn't find any meat to eat, and that I might just die in the next forty-eight hours, I still walked towards the kitchen with a large grin plastered on my face.

About an hour later, I was walking around the castle, Twilight showing me around, 'just in case' as she put it. It was pretty nice, rather peculiar as far as decoration goes but pretty nice nonetheless.  
Everything looked so... huge. Ponies were small, and although the princess was only a few inches shorter than me, and her horn was easily reaching six feet, everything was much larger than what you would have seen in a typical castle on Earth. Arriving back in front of the throne room, I jumped as a scared minotaur smashed a door open to my left.

"She... She threw me off her and hit me... She's a monster!"

He fainted on the spot.

God damn he must have overdone himself and trained her -really- intensely... Before I could say or do anything, Celestia appeared behind me.

"We need your help. Come with me."

"But uh... Aw whatever, I'm coming."

I turned my head just in time to see Fluttershy's snout poking out of what I assumed to be the gym. I gave her a smile and winked, unsure of whether she was able to see me or not.  
I followed her into the war room filled with weird ass machines, and she motioned to some even stranger machine, which looked like some kind of radar.

"I went looking for Queen Chrysalis, but apparently she's hiding in the depths of her hive. And she put on a spell that repels about every non-Changeling creature... Not even my magic can bypass this barrier. However I saw a few rodents getting through it, which leads me to believe this barrier is meant to stop certain creatures, such as us ponies. I highly doubt it would stop humans, for she does not even know what a human is."

"So what you're saying is, I'm the one who has to go look for her?"

"I'm afraid that's the only viable way."

"Aw hell... This ain't gonna be good. Maybe I could use that artifact thingy you told me about?"

"Oh, yes, that's right. As soon as Princess Luna awakes, she will raise the Moon, then she will come and attend our meeting. There, she will give it to you."

"What is it exactly?"

"Something you'll find really fun to use..." she smiled and gave me a playful wink.

"Oh by the way, it just occured to me that we're obviously gonna have to exclude Chrysalis from this first meeting. Unfortunately, it also means that you will have to go look for her tonight. Do not worry though, as I will provide you with an escort, none other than Princess Cadence and Shining Armor themselves. They will guide you to the edge of the barrier, but you'll be on your own from there. However by then you will have the NeverMeltIce, the legendary ice amulet that was kept as an ancient artifact in the crystal caves for many milleniums. Combined with your newfound powers, it should make you able to defend yourself from anything the Changeling drones can throw at you, and it would probably allow you to take on the queen herself, should the need arise. Do not be fooled by anypony though, anything other than a Changeling inside the hive would be a mere imitation, and should be ignored. If you don't give off emotions, they should ignore you in return... For the most part."

This wasn't sounding any good but I was going to try nonetheless, I just had to.

"I will also cast various spells ensuring that nopony gets tired before at least tomorrow night, so we will not have to sleep tonight. We will need every second we can have for ourselves... Now if you would follow me, the meeting room is this way, and it's gonna start really soon. I gathered as many creatures as I could, though only a few select leaders are present."

"Alright... Let's do this."

The meeting wasn't quite like what I had expected... A plain room, really, with a sort of stage, a microphone and rows of chairs. How ponies were supposed to use chairs, I didn't know but I wasn't really giving a fuck at the time. About a dozen creatures were here, and I could see some familiar faces among them.

I started explaining them what they should do, and why.

"From what I understood, we will all have our personal protective force field allowing us to effectively deflect gunfire. This will keep Princess Cadence and Shining Armor busy, and they will not be able to assist in anything else. However, as humans rely mostly on firearms, this will be our greatest asset, by far. From what Princess Celestia said, the portal will not let more complex things go through, such as vehicles or explosives. I can't say that we won't run into a few hand grenades but there should definitely not be any rocket launchers or tanks or anything else that could be really troublesome without some of our own to fight back."

Celestia nodded.

"Although I do not know what most of these things are, I can guarantee that only small firearms will be able to go through. I will do my best to transport all these humans while they do not have weapons in their vicinity but the spell affects a rather wide area, and is really... straining. I will not be of much use for several hours after casting it."

Well that doesn't sound good...

"Alright, thank you Princess Celestia. Fluttershy, you will be taking me into battle tomorrow."

"Me? But I... I'm afraid and..."

"You won't get hurt, I will protect you, I just need your ability to fly and your presence to keep my spirits up."

"Are you sure? It sounds... Dangerous."

"It sounds more dangerous than it will be, don't worry. You already showed off impressive abilities with Iron Will, now all you have to do is train to fly with extra weight... You can do it. You will do it. I believe in you, Flutty."

She blushed and flew up to me, sitting on my lap. I fought the urge of simply hugging her, instead stroking her mane, and continued.

"Rainbow Dash, you will help Fluttershy with that particular aspect of her training."

"Yes sir!" said the blue pony, adopting an 'at attention' posture. After all she had -some- military experience at the Wonderbolts academy.

"Now, Iron Will... While you can get scared off by a shy pegasus, you're still a bad-ass minotaur. You're taller and much, much bulkier than the average human. You will be an easy target, they will focus on you and watch in awe as their bullets are magically deflected, and ricochet off you. You will be able to easily close in and make them retreat. They might retreat by themselves, or you might have to make them retreat with a few well-placed punches. Any questions?"

"I pity the fools who try to take on Iron Will!" he screamed, flexing and kissing his biceps.

"That's not a question but that's the spirit. Show them that you rock!"

He let out a long war scream, steam blowing out of his nose. Fluttershy hugged me tighter, and I was enjoying it to the point I actually didn't 'bother' reassuring her by explaining her that she had just made the current object of her fear faint a few minutes earlier.

"Okay now, who do we have here... Twilight. Miss Twilight Sparkle. You will be our main sniper. You will stand on top of a high structure or hill, and fire off concentrated beams of energy. You're not here to kill, although killing will occur, you're mostly here to strike fear into them, and prevent them from wanting to move. They will probably associate your magic to lasers, which are depicted as fictional, but extremely powerful weapons in my world. That should buy us time and prevent them from setting up somewhere that could give them a tactical advantage."

I turned to Celestia.

"Princess, you told me magic could kill, right?"

"Yes, I will teach Twilight about those particular things tonight. She must be able to decide whether she wants to kill, incapacitate or simply scare off her targets."

"Exactly, now you're talking. Military precision."

A light blue unicorn raised a hoof, but I interrupted her before she could say anything.

"Trixie, I haven't forgotten about you. You will help Twilight. I know you've had your... quarrels in the past, but you will need to put those grudges aside and work together. You obviously won't have access to the alicorn amulet but you're great and powerful. You will be the back-up sniper, taking shots at any human foolish enough to venture out of cover. Unlike Twilight, your shots will be meant to kill. But most importantly, you will also be moving things. Supplies, such as scavenged weapons, and you will ensure that any hurt creature is taken to safety as soon as possible."

She gave me a smug grin.

"Trixie will fight alongside Twilight Sparkle, if not only to prove her that she's the strongest unicorn."

"Yeah, that's the spirit. Nothing like some competition to boost one's performances. Princess Celestia, would you mind teaching Trixie as well?"

"It will be done."

"Good, good. Spitfire... You will have to train Fluttershy to fly. While Rainbow Dash will ensure that the weight 'problem' is taken care of, you will need to train her to fly high and fast. Maybe not quite like a Wonderbolt but... She will need to increase her speed, precision and wing power, and she should be able to give a run to the average recruit by tomorrow morning."

She apparently took it as a challenge, and put on her sunglasses.

"It'll be done before you know it. I'll have her racing Soarin' before sunrise."

Rainbow Dash started laughing, before I glared at her.

"Perfect. Alright so... um... Diamond Dogs, right? You will be digging. Digging holes everywhere around the castle, making sure most humans who get too close will fall into one of them. That should buy enough time to repel the others, and along with the force fields and Twilight's sniping, will discourage them and give them the impression that we're practically invincible. Psychological warfare is one of the most important things, a distraught warrior is a dead warrior."

"You'll have to give us lots of gems for that!"

"Hey, I didn't hear anything about gems?" said a rather annoyed baby dragon.

"Ah, Spike... Yes, you'll get your gems too. You'll all get a lot of gems. Anyway Spike, you will be the messenger. You will be taking and sending reports to Princess Celestia, acting like a coordinator of some sort. This is one of the most important roles, and Rarity said she was counting on you."

"She said that? You can be sure I won't disappoint you!"

She didn't say shit but eh, it will make him more determinated. I turned my gaze to the draconequus sitting on the ceiling.

"Discord..."

Sitting on the ceiling. I had to stop for a few seconds and fight back the urge to laugh, the sight was truly hilarious. God damn it.

"Discord. You will face your greatest challenge so far. War is chaos, pure and unaltered chaos. You will have to refrain from playing along with it."

He flew back to the ground and shrank to match the size of a filly.

"What's the fun in that? You all always want to make sense, it's so boring."

I rolled my eyes.

"You can get behind their lines and bring chaos. Turn them against each other, bend gravity, whatever, as long as it affects them, and them only."

He grew back to full size and grinned.

"Alright, you got a deal."

He spawned a glass of chocolate milk and drank the glass, the chocolate splattering on the floor and soaking up Celestia's coat, making him burst in laughter. She gave him a hateful glare and I rolled my eyes again before resuming my speech.

"So, Iron Will, Princess Celestia, Discord, Diamond Dogs, Spike, Twilight, Trixie and Spitfire, you are officially warriors now. Not only warriors but also military leaders. You're in charge. You will win, we will win. They cannot do anything against us, we will prevail. Fluttershy and I will make sure of that if you fail to do so. But we won't have to, because you will win. Ain't that right?"

"Yes." they all answered in unison.

"I didn't hear you, what was that?"

"YES, SIR!" they screamed, loud enough to make me wince.

"Now that's more like it!"

I smiled, before the door smashed open.

"We are trying to sleep, what is this nonsense?"

A tired Luna with a disheveled mane was standing in the doorway.

"Ah, sister, I was waiting for you. I need you to retrieve the ice amulet and give it to the human, he will need it." Celestia said in a formal tone.

"Oh, right. We will get it."

"Wait, Princess Luna!" I called out.

"What is it, human?"

"I... Um, I'm gonna need you to keep the Moon up for the next thirty-six hours or so. It will make things much more difficult for humans, and much easier for us."

"Messing with this might cause a few... problems." inquired Celestia.

I rolled my eyes for what felt like the tenth time this evening. "Yeah, but losing a war might cause more than a few problems, so... We might as well use everything we've got to our advantage."

"Alright, we understand. We will keep the Moon up for as long as needed."

"Thanks Princess Luna."

She trotted out of the room.

"Alright so this is taken care of, now we need... Chrysalis."

Celestia stood up.

"Shining Armor and Princess Cadence are outside, waiting for you."

"Fluttershy, you stay here. Ponies can't get into the changelings' hive. Don't worry I'll be back shortly, I promise you."

"Be careful, please... I um... I'm gonna go train."

Fluttershy actively wanting to train? That war's already won.  
I met up with the two lovers outside, and started walking towards fuck knows what. Shining Armor spoke first.

"I think it would be faster to just teleport there. Can humans handle being teleported?"

"Well after everything I've been through in the past few days, I'll be damned if I can't."

"I take that as a yes..."

"Go on."

"WAIT!" a voice shouted from behind me. Princess Luna, and using the royal Canterlot voice. Right, I almost forgot the amulet thingy.

"We needed to give you this. But it needs to be attached to your body somehow, in order to work."

"What does it even do?"

"It enhances your inner powers and gives you near total control over them."

"Sounds interesting but, how does it work?"

"You just have to focus like you would to create those snowflakes you told our sister about. But beware, this thing is extremely powerful."

"Alright, now where do I put it?"

Luna walked up to me and started to analyze my body. A princess was checking me out. Well, I can live with this... Actually I was feeling alpha as fuck. Before I could have yet more dirty thoughts, she spoke up.

"We can see you have changed upon your arrival in Equestria."

"What do you mean?"

"You had some holes in your skin, didn't you?"

She must be referring to those piercings I had.

"Um, yes I did, and I have no idea why it all disappeared when I got here."

I didn't mention a thing about my hair or my slight 'increase' in muscle mass, I was too happy about both those things having changed.

"We do not know but those things are still here, our magic can sense this. They're just... disabled, you could say."

I was getting so used to things making little to no sense by now that I just went along with it.

"Okay... So?"

"We can detect that you had a hole in your tongue, along with a small piece of metal."

"Right, I did."

"We can make it appear again, it will not hurt."

"Cool but uh, what's the point?"

"We can put the amulet inside this little ball on the end of the metal rod."

She took the amulet out of a small box and it turned out to be barely visible to the naked eye. One millimeter at best.

"This, is the NeverMeltIce?"

"Do not be fooled by its size. The power it holds is unimaginable. It does not quite compete with the alicorn amulet because it lacks versatility, but it doesn't have negative effects and boosts your particular powers to levels you will have a hard time believing."

"Uh, okay... Well so you're just gonna make the piercing reappear, and magically put the amulet inside?"

"Yes."

"Alright, I'm ready, you can- OUCH! Motherf... Argh. That hurt."

"We are sorry."

"Yeah you better be..."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, I'm just gonna go now. We don't have much time."

"Go, human. Save our land."

"Will do my best."

I motioned for Shining to resume his spell. His horn started glowing and before I knew it, the scenery changed around me. It was a little disappointing, just that... A small flash of light and a sudden change of scenery, even though we had 'travelled' several miles. Oh well. We walked for a bit before reaching a dark forest, giving off an eerie green light.

"This is where the barrier begins... I hope you can get through."

I looked back at them and took a step forward. My hand reached for the barrier, and went right through it. I took a few more steps and soon enough I was entirely inside.

"Well, this works... Alright, wait for me here, I'll be back. Shortly... I hope."

And I was sure hoping it wouldn't be too hard to find the queen, after all wasn't a hive supposed to be a giant labyrinth of sorts? And I had entomophobia since I was a little kid... If I could make it through this, the war would feel like a cakewalk. I stuck my tongue out and looked at the amulet, which was glowing a very light blue. It was looking pretty awesome but I had more important things to do than checking myself out. I walked through a large opening, into what I believed to be the Changelings' hive, and mentally prepared myself for whatever was about to happen.

* * *

**_A/N: For anyone who is wondering, the game I'm referencing in my 'vision' is obviously Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. And I know the princess' name is supposed to be 'Cadance' but it looks retarded and was originally meant to be Cadence, so I spell it Cadence._**  
**_*puts on sunglasses*_**  
**_Deal with it._**  
**_Also I'm not quite sure how many chapters there will be but most definitely around 20. I pretty much winged the whole thing since the very beginning as I originally wrote this as a One-Shot, but I keep having ideas so... Anyway, I'd say the story is roughly at its half by this chapter. I have the next two chapters written by the time I'm publishing this one but I'm trying to keep it steady, like one chapter per week or so. If overwhelmed by positive feedback or something, I might consider updating sooner but as much as I love all the reviews you guys are giving me, they're still awfully scarce compared to how many views this story is getting, so yeah.  
And if you truly like it, well, why not leaving a review? D:_**  
**_It usually means much more to me than a favorite or follow or whatever, though those are appreciated as well. Anyway enough with my attention-whoring, hope y'all enjoyed this chapter._**


	11. Invocation Of The Apocalyptic Evil

**_A/N: Once again I'm sorry for any potential language mistakes, lacking vocabulary is really starting hurt as I try to give a more 'cinematic' feel to the whole thing, and extend the overall chapter length._**  
**_Also keep in mind that spoken lines are just that: spoken. The extensive use of '...' as well as repeated words are here because, well, you should read those lines imagining someone speaking, sometimes marking short pauses between words or even stammering._**  
**_And now for more useless ranting...  
While I have the majority of the next chapter written as I type this very sentence, I also broke my finger like the _****FAGGOT****_ I am. And what's more, I punched a door and not someone's face, so it's really what I call suffering in vain, for nothing. Anyway while it's my right pinky, which I don't use much, I'd be lying if I said that it helps for typing._**  
**_TL;DR version: the next few chapters might be shorter and / or it might take longer for me to update._**

* * *

It was really dark. I had no flashlight, no night vision spell or anything... I was in a large maze with glowing shades of green dancing on the walls. It was creepy as fuck. All I could do was keep on walking, I had no idea where I was nor where I was going, but I figured I was soon gonna run into trouble anyway so, I might as well make sure I can backtrack in a straight line. Wait, was I actually considering bailing out? This amulet was turning me into a pussy or something.

As usual when I'm having deep, philosophical thoughts, something had to stir me out of it. This time, it was a strange voice emanating from behind a wall.

"Yes... Yes, come to me. Love.. Sweet love... So hungry... Feed..."

Okay now I was genuinely scared. As I was trying to figure out where exactly the voice came from, a wall nearby crumbled and Queen Chrysalis appeared before my eyes.

I jerked my hands upwards as to surrender, or at least show her that I wasn't going to attack, but my sudden outburst of fear coupled to the power of the amulet had the total opposite effect.  
A powerful blast of cold wind was sent in a circle around me, shattering a few walls and covering everything, including the queen, in a thin layer of ice.

Holy shit this amulet wasn't fucking around.

"Uh... I'm sorry, I just... Uh, I can't really control that uh, ice thing yet. I didn't want you no harm, I was here for, um... Like..."

I was a bit less scared after my own display of power but my voice was still shaking a bit.  
Before I could continue, Chrysalis' horn started to glow, and all the ice melted in a few seconds. She looked at me with a puzzled, but hateful expression.

"What are... who are you?"

"I'm... a human. You probably never saw anything like me before, but that's not important. I have a deal for you, Queen Chrysalis. And please, don't ask me how I know your name."

"You come into my hive. You damage my hive. You deep-freeze me... And you dare not only saying that you have a deal for me, but you also expect me not to ask questions?"

"Well, uh... The freeze thing wasn't my fault. And I'm here on behalf of... creatures your barrier wouldn't allow to come. As for the questions, I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to answer them."

"Right. So, Celestia's found a new pet to do her wetwork, uh? How cute."

I frowned.

"How about you start showing a little respect? I can't control this ice thing, but it doesn't mean I can't be dangerous with it. I'm not here to hurt you, we need you. All of Equestria needs you."

"I'm afraid I might have to decline... I don't need you. There's no love around here anymore... My Changelings are dying, and I'm weak. I wouldn't be able to help even if I wanted to."

"I know, but I can help with that."

"How?" she asked, taking a step forward and cocking her head to the side.

"Your race, you feed on emotions, right?"

"Yes."

"You can feed on hate too, right?"

"Yes..."

"Now what if I told you, an entire army of bloodthirsty monsters will be trying to take over Equestria tomorrow, and the hatred they give off could feed your entire hive for years?"

"Where are you going with this?"

"You could finally feed... And you would defend your own land in the process."

"Fighting alongside you, and the princesses? I don't think so."

"Chrysalis, look at me. You're not stupid, neither am I. Put your differences aside and think for a second. If humans take over, it's the end. The end of everything, that includes you, your hive and all of your Changelings."

"Maybe it's better that way."

"No, it's not. Besides..." I took a step towards her and smiled. "You wouldn't want to let any creature other than you, personally defeat Celestia, now would you?"

"I don't care for Celestia anymore. Our race is dying and I'll soon become weak enough to be defeated by a regular unicorn..."

God damn it, I wasn't getting anywhere like that. While she had the 'haircut', I didn't remember her to be so emo... I had to try a more... 'hands-on' approach.

"You want love, right?"

"Yes, and you promised me hatred... No deal, regardless of how much there is of it."

"Okay, alright. Now, what if I do this?"

Fighting back my fear and disgust, I closed the distance between her and me and hugged her tight, softly caressing her withers and nuzzling her mane with my head.

"W-wha... But I... I... Wha... What?"

Her horn was glowing intensely and she was starting to close her eyes, her poor attempt at forming a proper sentence turning into some sort of purring. I hugged her even tighter and gave her a soft kiss on the cheek.  
Her horn stopped glowing and her entire body started to radiate and emit green sparks. I backed away and watched as her eyes turned complete green, glowing more brightly than anything I had ever seen. After a few seconds, she fell unconscious to the ground.

What the hell had just happened? And for fuck's sake, what the fuck was up with every single creature in this world falling unconscious all the time?  
I walked up to her and picked her up, but before I could cradle her in my arms, she 'woke up' and stood up on her own, pushing me away with her magic in the process.

"I... That was..."

"What happened?"

"I don't know. I felt a violent surge of energy and... Everything went dark."

"Yeah you passed out for a few seconds. Was it because I... hugged you?"

"I... I think so. I didn't have any sort of love to feed on since such a long time, such a swift income of power was too much for me to handle."

I chuckled at her choice of words.

"It was a simple hug, you could have lots of these if you wanted... Just help us, and you'll be more powerful than ever. And I'll make sure your race can freely roam around Equestria, as long as you don't impersonate any creature. Just, you know, act normally and you will receive love."

"Why would anyone like... insects?"

"They don't see you as insects. They see you as evil, mind-controlling, deceiving, shapeshifting monsters, ready to do anything in order to steal somepony's emotions. I know you just need to feed, but that's not what your methods lead to believe at first glance."

"I... That was the only method I could think of. After all, we're Changelings for a reason, right?"

"I guess... I can also imagine that simply walking around with your current form is troublesome and won't get you much love but, this can change. Fight with us, win with us, and you'll be seen as a hero, our ally, and one of us. I'll make sure of it, personally."

"How can you make sure of such a thing? You're probably Celestia's lackey, and you're-"

"Actually I'm the military leader."

Her eyes widened in surprise, before narrowing again.

"Those monsters I was talking about, they are others of my kind. However their intentions are quite different, and they must be defeated. And I am the only one with sufficient knowledge about them. They're using things that don't even exist here in Equestria, such as firearms, and cold-blooded murder is an everyday thing for them."

"So you're gonna... fight those things? Tomorrow?"

"Yes, and many creatures are gonna fight alongside me. The princesses, many ponies, a few minotaurs, even Discord."

"Discord? The legendary spirit of chaos?"

"Yep."

"He... How could you... 'tame' him?"

"My friend Fluttershy took care of that."

"What? Fluttershy? That shy little yellow pegasus?"

She sounded like she was spitting out her words. Taking particular pride in her apparent hatred for -my- friend, I gave her the biggest shit-eating grin I could muster.

"That particular one."

"She... tamed a draconequus?"

"She sure did."

I had her backed into a corner, so to speak.

"Maybe... After all I don't have anything to lose. Fine, creature, I will accept your offer. But you will have to make sure to hold your end of the bargain, or I will-"

I silenced her by hugging her again.

"I'm a man of my word. Just don't attack anypony, and avoid shapeshifting, even if it's into a human. This will be wetwork as you stated it, you wouldn't stand a chance if caught out in the open."

"...Alright. Get out of here, and back to Canterlot. Make sure the skies are clear, my Changelings and I will be coming in a few hours."

"You got it."

I happily walked out of the hive, happy that I could convince her, and happy that I could simply walk back in a straight line. And on top of it, I had maybe found a way to solve everything for her race. I was never one for peace back on Earth but with creatures actually cooperating, it was feeling like a natural thing to do.

Upon stepping outside, I couldn't see the barrier anymore. Shining Armor and Cadence were standing there with puzzled expressions.

"She's in, we have a deal. I'll have to tell Princess Celestia about it but... I think she's gonna be a great asset."

Cadence was the first to snap out of her 'trance'.

"Did you try out the amulet?"

"Um, not really. It tried itself out... Hardly believable."

"Be careful with it, its power is really, really immense."

"I will. We should go back now, the queen and her drones should be coming to Canterlot in a few hours. I know you two might hold particular grief against her but... we have a deal. We need her."

"Whatever... I just hope you're right."

Her husband teleported us back to the castle, and I immediately reported to Celestia, explaining her the whole deal and everything.

"I can't say I'm too happy about you taking such... initiatives, but there's not much I can do myself. The war will commence in about eighteen hours, and everypony is training right now. You should be, too."

"What can I do? I mean... Actually I haven't even assigned a specific role to myself. What am I to do? Throw ice at them?"

"You must train with the amulet and learn to control it. Come with me, I will help you."

"Can I see Fluttershy first? I'd like to... You know, see her."

"I'm sorry, there's no time for that. You will see her in the morning, we must start right away."

"...Okay, lead the way."

I followed her in the gardens and trained for a few hours. I wasn't quite exactly 'in control' but I could freeze things with my breath and fire small rays of ice. However I kept on training, I had no idea what spell she had cast to stop fatigue from setting in, but being able to do the same (straining) thing over and over for several hours, and not feeling tired at all, was pretty satisfying.

The morning soon came, and I was able to control most of my newly acquired powers. It was still night due to Luna agreeing to keep to the Moon up, but the sky was tinted with strange hues of pink, as opposed to the purple night sky.  
However something was bugging me: I hadn't seen Chrysalis, nor heard of her arrival... Maybe she had bailed out? She couldn't be trusted after all...

Celestia never spoke of the matter, and neither did I.

"Now, turn this pond into solid ice!

"The entire pond? Are you serious?"

"Do it."

I focused as hard as I could and a strong beam of frozen energy shot out of my eyes. Actually, it was materializing a few inches away from my face but the glow surrounding it was making it look like I was shooting it out of my eyes. I couldn't see jack shit, either, so I had to either stop or highly decrease the intensity in order to adjust my aim, and I couldn't track a moving target. That was the only downside, but a big one, especially if I was to do this while riding Fluttershy, who was supposed to be flying much, much faster than the random rocks Celestia had been making me shoot out of the sky a few hours ago.  
After about ten seconds I stopped my 'spell', and much to my surprise the whole pond was completely frozen.

Celestia clapped her hooves and gave me a quick hug.

"We are going to win. I can't believe how fast you learned."

"Well, I... I had a good teacher. And this thing does most of the work, not me."

"Don't be modest, you're doing very good. We should go back now, we've been at it for nearly ten hours. We'll have one last meeting after lunch."

"When does shit get real again?"

"6 P.M., this evening."

"Alright..."

"We'll win, don't worry. Just keep this up and you're gonna ice them."

She chuckled at her own 'joke'.  
She looked much more confident than me, but well. Having the fate of a whole... Nation? Planet? Dimension? Whatever, having the fate of millions of creatures practically resting in your hands... It wasn't really helping for confidence.

The morning went by pretty uneventfully, and I spent the majority of it meditating in Celestia's room. She told me that meditation could help me controlling my powers, and I didn't want to be around the dozens of stressed ponies running around, preparing for the ordeal about to happen. After checking on various ponies and seeing how well their training was going, I walked to the kitchen and half-heartedly ate something. I wasn't hungry, I wasn't tired, I was feeling... empty. Maybe a little scared, too.  
After all there was no telling what could happen, and I was still somewhat skeptical about Celestia's ability to teleport an entire army through the portal, and the possible consequences of that spell. I was about to go back to meditating when a door opened to my right, and Fluttershy flew out like a bullet, knocking me off my feet. The blow felt far more powerful than what Rainbow Dash had inflicted on me the first time I encountered her. Iron Will and Spitfire must have turned her into a war machine.

I was lying on my back with the not-so-shy-anymore pegasus lying on top of me. I gave her a small grin and she nuzzled my chest, hugging me.  
Tight. A bit too tight maybe... As I pushed her away gently and got up to my feet, I heard something... Like a spark, magic maybe? I didn't give it too much thought though, and I walked back to the princess' room, meditating with Fluttershy sitting next to me.

"What are you doing?" she asked, her shy tone completely gone.

"Meditation."

"Sounds interesting."

"It's, uh... Helpful. I think. I haven't tried to see the difference but, it makes me feel calm."

After a long silence, she spoke up.

"What do you think of the way I tamed Discord?"

As I was about to answer, something striked me.

"I... Uh, why would you think I know about this?"

"Uh... Well, I assumed you knew..."

"I do, but... I'm surprised you'd assume that. Anyway, it was just, you know, you being yourself. Your cute little self."

She didn't squee, much to my surprise, but she smiled and blankly stared at the wall. She seemed to be lost in thought.  
Maybe she's trying to meditate too?

Before I could develop that thought, Celestia burst into the room.

"It begins!"

"Princess, what's going on?"

"The humans, they managed to find the portal, and they're trying to open it using a weird song they're singing backwards!"

"What the... wait. What?"

"We don't know, but we better get ready and have them go through it before they can organize themselves and do it of their own accord."

"Alright, everypony needs to be ready and take tactical positions. Fluttershy, it's on."

"Oh you're damn right it's on..."

I couldn't help but feel like something was wrong with her demeanor. She had been trained but... Fluttershy being all assertive, borderline aggressive, felt wrong. I didn't give it much thought, mostly because it wasn't time for such things, and followed the princess into the war room. All the ponies and other creatures were here, except of course Chrysalis, who had apparently bailed out. After all if she'd rather see her race starve to death... Her choice, her problem.

Celestia spoke up.

"Alright, in a few minutes I will cast the spell that will bring the humans here. We do not know how many of them will be here, but it will most likely be in the hundreds. Also, the portal will close, probably forever, after the last one went through it, which means two things. First of all, they will be stranded here, with no way to get back to Earth whatsoever. Being in a land they know nothing of will throw them off, but not for long, which is why we need to act switly. Second, well... Well, they have to... I mean, we'll have to..."

She couldn't quite bring herself up to say such a thing, and looked at me, embarrassed. I smiled knowingly and continued her speech.

"They must be exterminated."

Ignoring the gasps echoing around the room, I continued.

"We will have to kill them, I doubt they would cooperate, and I doubt we could contain them until Princess Celestia has recovered enough energy to re-open the portal and send them back to where they belong. Stalling is not an option. Taking prisoners is not an option. Humans are far too dangerous even with their bare hands, and although I cannot be sure they will go through the same change, I did get much, much stronger upon my arrival here."

Every single living creature in the room had their mouth wide open. Upon realizing how serious all of this was, they all nodded and took notes, apparently acknowledging that there weren't many alternate options. If they could go with the idea of killing, the hardest thing was done. Now to get them to actually kill... I never thought I'd be killing someone, let alone dozens of soldiers, but... What needs to be done, needs to be done.

"So, as Princess Celestia said, they will be arriving soon, probably in very large numbers, and most likely equipped with large-caliber, high-capacity firearms. I assume not many of you know what a firearm is, and it's honestly not a concern as Shining Armor over here, will assist every single one of us with our very own protective force field, deflecting anything the humans might throw at us. However this is a defensive spell, and apart from Iron Will, nopony is going to use it as part of an offensive technique. Stay on the move, spread out, move erratically and we'll have won the most important part: psychological warfare. By moving swiftly and deflecting the few bullets that will be able to actually hit us, we'll give an impression of invincibility, and bring their spirits down, regardless of how vulnerable we could actually be. By doing so, we will be fighting by our own rules, and they will be out of their element, making them easy targets. Unicorns, you can disarm them, and bring the weapons back to the castle. Trixie, if things go according to the plan, you will be moving hectic quantities of weapons. Be extremely careful not the press the triggers. You will be protected, a majority of the city will be protected from outside attacks, but discharging firearms indoors will still cause severe damage to walls, furniture and the like. Twilight, you will not shoot to kill, but instead pin them down and drive fear into them. They're ruthless killers, we're not. We're going to outsmart them, outplay them and ultimately outeverything them. While they're all expendable, it doesn't mean they should all be killed right away if they can be disarmed, or rendered helpless by any other mean. The force field around Canterlot should stop any explosive if they have any, but that doesn't mean we want the outskirts of the city to look like a post-apocalyptic wasteland. Steer clear of anything they throw by hand, and anything that travels at a low velocity, followed by a trail of smoke. If we remain in motion, and spread out, that will most likely deter them from wanting to use explosives. Alright everypony, get out there. Use of deadly force is authorized."

After coming back down from my post-orgasm-like bliss induced by speaking like I was an actual military leader or some shit, I realized that I, myself, had a very important role.

"Fluttershy, you ready?"

"I'm ready."

I jumped on her and she took off, surprisingly easily. I wasn't really used to flying but I was feeling pretty secure. I had a hand wrapped around her neck and my legs dangling on both sides of her hind rear, apparently even assisting her in turning. It felt somewhat strange to be riding a creature so much smaller than me but given the situation, that wasn't exactly my main concern. We arrived in front of the giant meadows surrounding the city, the fields where the humans should appear, at any moment now. A gigantic blue dome formed around the city, and much smaller pink spheres formed around every single living creature that was around.

It was time.

Something started shining in the sky. Due to the night vision spell Celestia had cast for pretty much everypony who was going to fight, the sudden light blinded me. A giant vortex appeared and lowered to ground level, shining brighter as it did so. I shielded my eyes and so did Fluttershy, landing softly in the grass. It took nearly one full minute before I could open my eyes, and my ears were ringing. Upon seeing what was displayed before me, every single bit of confidence I had died inside me.

* * *

**_A/N: Obvious references to Imaginationland, for those of you who know South Park. I apologize for any plothole, and yes once again I know that humans, soldiers, etc. aren't necessarily evil bloodthirsty monsters but for obvious reasons I need to depict them as such._**  
**_And yes, I obviously shamelessly ripped off the name 'NeverMeltIce' from one of the greatest video games known to mankind._**

**_Love letter (ignore the following): _****Pokémon G/S/C, I love you, and you will remain in my heart (and in my drawers) even after X/Y will have succeeded in killing whatever was left of the once glorious franchise. Not even twelve years and multiple battery changes will have altered my love for you.**  
**Forever yours, Nosfrat.**


	12. Fields Of Despair

I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Several hundreds of them, armored vehicles, mounted machine guns, humvees with sandbags filling their trunks... It's like Celestia had teleported a chunk of an actual battlefield, rather than a bunch of human themselves.

"Holy... motherfucker. This is bad."

Fluttershy looked up at me, smiling.

"Don't tell me you're scared?"

"Uh... I don't know. Nopony was expecting this."

"Who cares, uh? Let's ruin 'em!"

She let out a long shriek and took off, the violent flap from her wings making a cloud of smoke rise from the ground. This wasn't Fluttershy anymore... Even the Discorded Fluttershy wasn't like that. She was starting to scare me.

"Fluttershy, stop, that's not the plan!"

"I could care less about the plans."

Well she was my ride, and I was about fifty feet in the air. I had no choice other than going along with it.

"Push your mane aside, so I can have a clear shot!" I yelled, my voice muffled by the wind. Why was she wearing her mane on this particular side again?

"Ice those foals!"

I focused and let out a powerful stream of ice, neutralizing a few dozens of them before they could even get their bearings. Maybe Fluttershy's blitzkrieg strategy was gonna work...

"To the left, we need to neutralize those tanks! Keep moving, steady... Steady..."

I fired off another laser of concentrated energy and froze another bunch of soldiers, along with a few vehicles.

"Looking good so far, maybe we..."

I stopped and turned my head around, realizing that we were the only ones fighting. Fluttershy and I were several hundred yards in front of everypony else, and even though I couldn't see any of them clearly, being nearly half a mile away, I knew that they were all staring with their mouths hanging and their eyes wide open. Not letting that fact faze me, I turned my gaze back to the front, seeking my next target. I quickly noticed a mortar crew setting up, and aimed at them.

"Fluttershy, don't move, hover in place for a few seconds."

"Great idea..." she scoffed, her voice practically dripping with sarcasm, apparently knowing my next move.

"Just do it!"

I took aim and built up and giant ball of frozen magic, before releasing it with all my might. It traveled at extreme speeds and hit the ground with a violent blast of energy, creating a shockwave and a slight earthquake.

"Brace yourself! Shockwave incoming!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, holding onto Fluttershy as tightly as I could, while she just looked back at me, smiling.  
Thanks to the much lower speed of sound, we actually had time to prepare for the impact. Wait, why wasn't she bracing herself?

"Fluttershy, you need to-"

I couldn't finish my sentence as the shockwave reached us, and I disappeared. And so did everything around me. A few seconds later, I was at the same spot, with the shockwave far behind.

"What the... Fluttershy?"

"Don't worry, it's all good. C'mon, ice those guys over there!" she screamed, green sparks of energy emanating from her mane.

"Fluttershy, what did you..."

Realization hit me square in the face. I violently grabbed her mane, yanking it backwards and nearly snapping her neck.

"You fucking insect scum! We had a deal! And I thought you had just cowarded out of it! How could you do that you worthless piece of-"

I stopped upon seeing what was unfolding before my eyes.

"Sweetie, you might wanna save the disputes for later, we have a problem!"

I didn't have time to ponder over the fact she had just called me 'sweetie', as I saw the whole area my energy 'spell' had covered in ice quickly melting. A stream of fire appeared from behind armored vehicles, thawing out whatever hadn't fully melted yet.

"I think they're not really affected by magic, or anything really... That shockwave was more violent than the one that defeated my entire army a few months ago!"

So... That would explain why I seemed to be much stronger since my arrival. Humans were reacting differently to the physics in Equestria, and magic was barely having any effect on them... My whole plan had gone to shit, Celestia was gonna be out for a few days after her spell, force fields were worthless if we couldn't do anything to them in return, and on top of it, I was riding Chrysalis and had no idea where the real Fluttershy was, and even then, that was assuming she was still alive.

"Retreat, retreat! They got fucking flamethrowers, and we're the only ones here!"

"I hate fire!" screamed the Changeling queen, quickly reverting back to her normal form.

After landing softly in the grass, I jumped off her and gave her the most hateful glare I could manage.

"What did you do with Fluttershy? Did you bring in any of your drones?"

"No, I'm alone."

She had now reverted to her normal form, fully. I grabbed her horn and yanked her head, and her whole body, towards me.

"What did you do with Fluttershy?"

"I... sent her away."

"The crystal caves?"

"No, my dear. I sent her away. Far away."

"Where?"

"I'm afraid I can't-"

I pounced her, smashing her head to the ground and screamed loud enough to hurt my throat.

"WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU SEND HER?"

She was shaking with fear, and her eyes were wide open. I had probably turned red by now, and I could feel the veins across my face throbbing hard from rage.

"I just... I sent her away. I don't know where, I just cast a spell that would make her disappear, and she disappeared! I had never used that spell before, she... She could be anywhere in Equestria, she could be in your world, she could be dead, she could be... anywhere, anything, I don't know, I have no way of knowing. It's all your fault!"

Snowflakes had started to fall in a several feet radius around us.

"My fault? MY fault?!" I nearly screamed, trying to remain as calm as I could, which was on the edge of impossibility.

"When you came yesterday, and you hugged me... It was the most insane source of love and power I had ever felt in my life. I needed more of it, I was quick to figure out you liked Fluttershy so... You're not stupid, you can figure out the rest."

I grabbed her horn again and yanked her head to the side. A few humans were marching forward, and a few pegasi and unicorns were flying and levitating, respectively, above us, and towards the humans. Streams of energy and bullets had started filling the air.

"Look at this. There's a fucking war going on out there... We might lose Equestria. We might all die... We might be made prisoners, slaves, anything... And all you can think of, is ruin everything we planned so far just so you can get power and love for yourself, something you were reluctant to even agree to yesterday, and that I had promised you anyway?"

Suddenly I realized, involving her into this whole thing was my idea. She was right, it -was- my fault. I had only myself to blame.

"But then, you're a little deceiving piece of scum... I should have never went to you in the first place."

"We can still win."

"Oh so now it's 'we', huh?"

"We can win! I mean, we... Uh..."

"They're literally unaffected by magic. They have armored vehicles, advanced, military-grade weaponry, there are hundreds of them and they're unaffected by magic. And we have to kill them all, or stall them for several days?"

My gaze lingered on her for a few seconds, before I dropped my head in defeat.

"Maybe... My drones..."

Lost in my thoughts, I didn't see her closing in. The little bit of sanity I had left was quick to leave me when she hugged me and pressed her lips against mine. I jumped backwards, and the sudden outburst of emotions made me cast a foot thick layer of ice covering the queen, and the grass within a few dozen feet. She was completely frozen, and looked like a mosquito trapped in a piece of amber. I stood there for a few seconds, glaring at her, before grinning and turning around.

"Serves you right... I'm outta here."

I walked back to the castle, intending to report to Celestia and explain her my major fuck-up, whatever she would do to me couldn't possibly be worse than the outcomes of losing a war, but I found her lying on her bed, panting.  
God damn it I -still- wasn't shaken enough for my mind not to come up with random dirty thoughts.

"I... I hope things are going according to... according to the plan, I might have... messed something up, maybe... It... it was... exhausting, I... I'm sorry, I'll be out for... for a couple of days... I... Everypony counts on you."

Well I'll be fucked sideways, backwards, upside-down, diagonally and in all orifices. I had just screwed everything up, yet they were all counting on me?  
I was just a human after all... I was a human. Like them...  
Like them! Holy shit! How did I -not- think about this earlier?

"Princess, I... I think I'm gonna go behind their lines. I'm a human too, I'm gonna try and convince them that I'm on their side, and try to stall them for as long as possible."

"I..."

She passed out before she could finish her sentence. This wasn't good, at all. I walked out of the castle and walked straight ahead, bullets whistling past me. I didn't have the force field anymore, it broke apart when I 'iced' the queen, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything anymore... Except finding Fluttershy.

Screw trying to talk sense into humans. I tried doing this for twenty-three years with little to no success, I wasn't about to try again. Screw trying to stall them. Screw killing them. Screw everything.  
I walked right past the soldiers, casting a wall of ice between them and me to shield myself from any potential harm, and kept walking forward with only one goal in mind...  
I was gonna find my little Flutty, even if it meant giving my life.

* * *

**_A/N: The ice-related magic I use is similar to any other kind of magic, I.E. it doesn't mean that regular unicorn magic could work where mine failed, or vice-versa._**  
**_And to those who might be wondering about things like, 'OMG if negative energy affects Equestria, then why doesn't positive energy affect Earth?!1?1oneoneexclamationmarkoneone', well, it's because as you should have guessed by now, humans react differently to magic, and are almost immune to most 'direct' effects. No, that's not the effect of a dozen years of technological progress. I pondered over the idea of humans having developed defense against 'alien' weaponry (magic) but I didn't like it. Since humans come from a dimension where magic doesn't exist, it makes sense for them to be immune to it, or at least react to it in strange / unexpected ways._**  
**_As for the Elements of Harmony, well... They're so overpowered it's not even funny._**  
**_To those who thought the protagonist didn't think things through even though he was aware over a decade had passed on Earth, well... In 2013, the very vast majority of our current weaponry is from the previous century, and the newer weapons and such are merely enhancements of previously existing models. As far as infantry weaponry goes, I'm pretty damn sure that in twelve years humans will still be using bullets, and as long as a force field can deflect bullets, there's nothing a firearm can do against it, no matter how advanced it is._**  
**_Obviously the war has got to, and is going to end somehow, but we'll take a well-needed break from the mindfucking action for a few chapters._**

**_I will put this story on hold for now, as I somewhat lost interest and motivation for it, the feedback I'm getting isn't exactly the greatest, (quality- and quantity-wise) and I'm currently working on a few other stories. I will eventually get back to this one and finish it but for now, it's on hiatus._**  
**_Stand by._**


	13. My Spirit Will Go On

I was quick to tune out the yelling coming from the humans I had left behind me. Whatever they could possibly want to tell me, I wasn't about to start giving a shit. I had no idea where I was going, but I kept walking. For what seemed like hours, I kept walking forward with no particular goal in mind, other than finding Fluttershy. I could swear I was seeing her around every corner, behind every rock, in every tree... When did I start caring about her -that- much?

I would have been totally unable to retrace my steps back to Canterlot, despite having walked in a straight line for the most part, the scenery was looking so bland, and dull, and... uninteresting.  
Empty. Even worse than what I was used to in the suburbs I lived in.  
Eventually I reached a forest, a large, thick forest. In fact it was so thick, not even the moonlight could penetrate the massive amount of leaves shielding the ground from any source of light. I was glad I still had that night vision spell, but even then it was darker than I'd have liked.

Knowing Fluttershy, she wouldn't wander in such a place, especially not on her own, but she was still more likely to be hiding in a tree or something, than to be walking around in plain sight. I had no idea how large Equestria was, if it was even on a planet, if the planet was round... Maybe it was much, much larger than the Earth?  
I knew my chances of finding her were as close to zero as they could possibly get, but something deep inside was telling me not to give up.  
I swallowed hard and entered the forest.

I felt like I was in some kind of horror movie or something. There were a few creepy noises here and there but, I was mostly hearing the wind rustling the leaves, and the occasional crackling of sticks under my footsteps. I hadn't seen any form of life since several hours now, and it was starting to get a little unsettling. Surely there were other inhabited areas in Equestria, right?

If I had to guess, I would have said I had walked about fifteen miles since I had left Canterlot. Maybe a little more... My legs were starting to hurt and I was in that forest since a good half hour already. It seemed to get darker by the minute. I was starting to wonder how long the night vision spell was supposed to last, when I accidentally stepped onto a metallic object, some sort of plate. Upon hearing a small 'click', I instinctively jumped back and adopted a combat stance, which probably made me look like a complete moron. I heard loud rambling to my right, and a large rock started to move. Did I find an ancient temple or some shit?

When the rock stopped moving, it revealed a large hole in the ground with ivy everywhere. Now whatever the hell was down there, I would have to be insane to even consider it... But I guess I was insane by now. I approached the hole and noticed a few wooden planks. It looked like they could be used as a makeshift ladder... As I put my foot on the first plank, testing the waters, everything went black. Apparently the spell had ended, and I couldn't see anything. Absolutely everything was pitch black.

As I was about to climb out of the hole, I heard a faint, distant scream. It was coming from below. Against my better judgement, I started climbing down again and screamed when my lead foot felt nothing past the fourth plank. I fell about three feet and landed on my ass, in a pack of leaves. Well that wasn't a long drop at least...

I heard another scream and turned around, seeing a very faint light emanating from what seemed to be a tunnel. I started walking towards whatever it was, and although I was starting to feel like I was back in the Changelings' hive, I kept following the light. I could -see- by now, the 'walls' were covered with dirt, ivy and small roots, the ground was littered with leaves and mud, and there were torches on the walls. I had no idea why they were all out but, between that and the moving rock, it seemed pretty obvious that whatever was down there wanted to be left alone.  
Why was I here again?

Right. Fluttershy.

Not that I was going to find her by dropping down a hole I found by accident, but whatever. It wasn't like I had many options anyway... Leaving the battlefield to go on a 'rescue' mission, not knowing where to go or even if Fluttershy was still alive -and- in the same dimension... Yep, what I was currently doing would have been definitely high up on my list of most stupid shit I've ever done.

Still advancing in the tunnels, I could now see the light flickering. It was most definitely a fire. After turning to the left, I arrived in front of a small room. There was something inside. I backed up behind a corner and took a peek inside the room. A small hooded figure was sitting in front of a large fireplace, muttering unintelligible 'words'. There was a large wooden table, various jars and bottles, and the walls were covered with bricks and shelves.

Whatever that creature was, it had a thick accent and was reciting what sounded like incantations. I heard another small scream and it -definitely- wasn't coming from the same creature... I couldn't see the whole room from where I was, for all I knew there could be dozens of other creatures in there. What I was about to do was probably foolish, but it wasn't like it would be the first foolish thing of the day for me...

I slowly walked out of cover, trying to remain silent as I approached the hooded silhouette. It was standing in front of a small cauldron. I stood there, towering over its three feet stature, and crossed my arms. There was nothing else in the room, just a few more shelves and bottles. I felt like I was in Zecora's shelter or something. The figure eventually noticed my presense and spoke calmly, not even bothering to face me.

"Who are you, and what are you doing here?"

"Well, I could ask you the same."

"Your point is valid."

"Okay so uh, where are you? I mean, where are we, where am I? I accidentally found a hole and decided to drop down into it, and here I am?"

"You found my shelter. Nothing to brag about."

"Hey, I didn't brag."

"Calm down, my friend. Stress paves the way to bad karma."

Well that was some spiritual shit right there. It definitely sounded and looked like a zebra. Out of nowhere I heard yet another faint scream, but louder this time. Or actually, closer.

"Hey, what's that scream?"

"Nothing you should worry about."

"That doesn't answer my question."

"Your question was-"

Suddenly, the creature froze. It turned to me and its eyes lit up bright yellow. It took a small step backwards and took off its hood thingy, revealing what looked like a male zebra.

"Holy muffins on a stick, what the hay are you?"

"Nothing you should worry about... If you answer the damn question."

Despite having magic in its arsenal, I wasn't scared of it. Not only zebras had to use potions and stuff to use magic, but I also knew by now that I was immune to magic. Or was I?  
If I was immune, how could Celestia's spells affect me?  
I could only hope that there was a simple answer to all this, such as, her magic worked because I was 'willing' to let her use it on me, or something...

The zebra tugged on my pants, making me come back to reality.

"Hey, are you listening?"

"Uh, what? Sorry. What did you say?"

"I said that this scream came from a creature I found a few hours ago."

"Okay, what kind of creature is it?"

"She wouldn't stay calm and kept attacking me, I had to neutralize her temporarily and bring her down there. Who knows what damage she could have done up here, if I had let her stay above the ground... This forest has a very fragile ecosystem."

"That didn't answer my question. What creature is it exactly?"

"A pegasus, I think. A yellow pegasus. I very rarely see ponies, but she is-"

"Wait, wait, wait. A yellow pegasus? Can I see her please?"

"Okay. Follow me, but stay calm. I read that pegasi could sense fear and attack accordingly."

Well wasn't that a load of shit. I was glad to see that zebras weren't unlike people, scared of stuff they don't know because they read something in a book. Oh well.  
Arriving in front of a small cage, I knew what was standing inside. I just knew it. It had to be her. It just had to...  
The zebra gave me a small torch and I kneeled in front of the cage, where I could easily make out the distinct shape of a winged pony.

After a short incantation, the torch lit up and right before my eyes, was standing...

* * *

**_A/N: I actually wrote this chapter (and the next one) over two weeks ago but, what the hell._**


	14. The Fire Still Burns

**_A/N: To all the 'guests' who tend to give me mixed to negative reviews, I think you're kinda missing the point, and it would probably be a good idea to consider registering so I can PM you and explain you what you seem to be missing. There would be nothing to write about if the protagonist didn't have an attitude that tends to get him, and everyone else, in trouble. There wouldn't be no surprises or twists if he planned everything carefully and thoroughly, and therefore the (lack of a) story would be boring. The protagonist is obviously far from perfect, he's an old teenager holding serious grudges against humanity in general, and having been given various powers and the status of military leader obviously took away whatever little rationality he had left, and upon realizing how bad he messed up, he chose to do the one thing most people would do if given the choice after messing up: he runs away, trying to get away from all of this and maybe trying to fix whatever he can._**  
**_The other things you've been wondering about, and that seem to be pissing you off big time, will be explained in the later chapters._**  
**_Think redemption or something like that._**

* * *

"Spitfire? What the fuck?!"

I stood up and almost lost balance, staggering backwards. She gave me a stern look, and sighed.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"Well, what are -you- doing here?"

"I was looking for you. A few ponies saw you running away, and Discord asked me to go and find you."

"And you listen to Discord?"

"He said you put him in charge of replacing you, should anything happen to you."

Son of a bitch. Well I should have been expecting no less from him, I guess.

"No, I never put him in charge of anything. But it doesn't matter, how did you end up here?"

"I got lost in those woods and the night vision spell failed, and I... I started..."

"You started what?"

She gave me a hateful glare and sighed again.

"I started panicking, alright?"

"Alright, alright, what's the big deal?"

"What's the big deal? I'm a Wonderbolt!"

"So what, just because of that you're not allowed to panic?"

"...I guess you got a point. I'm sorry."

"You can act normally when Rainbow Dash is not around, you know."

She let out a small chuckle and scratched the back of her mane with a front hoof.

"Well yeah, I suppose you're right. Anyway this... thing, right here behind you, found me as I was screaming, and immobilized me with some magic I had never seen before. And he brought me here... I don't know what he's going to do now..."

"I don't know either but it's irrelevant, I'm taking over."

The zebra, who had remained silent until now, spoke up.

"Hey, you're not taking anything over, you're in my cavern. I'm the boss here."

"And what exactly were you planning on doing to her?"

"I don't know, study her?"

"You don't know shit about pegasi. Or ponies, for that matter."

"Isn't that a good reason for wanting to study her?"

God damn, I was too used to arguing with complete morons or oblivious people / ponies.

"Fair enough, but I'm gonna have to get out of here. And she will come with me. And you'll have to help us."

"Why would I help you? You break into my lair, you intend on stealing a creature I captured myself, and I should help the both of you? I'm no fool."

I sighed, turned my gaze towards his cauldron and froze it on the spot.

"If you're no fool, then you're gonna help us. Aren't you?"

I suppressed a laugh as his eyes widened and his jaw dropped. Holy shit, I was hoping I could keep this amulet forever.

"My soup! I... Alright, alright. Now listen, I don't know what kind of twisted magic this is but... If I help you, can you teach me how it works?"

"Well, why don't you come to Ponyville one day, and see for yourself?"

"Ponyville? What is that?"

"Jesus... You don't get out much, do you?"

"Whatever and wherever this Ponyville place is, it must be far enough for me not to know about it."

I rolled my eyes and turned to the pony behind me.

"Spitfire, how long did it take you to fly from Canterlot to this forest?"

"Um, about twenty minutes I think? Maybe twenty-five."

"See, not even half an hour of flight for a trained pegasus. And from there you can take the train to Ponyville."

The captain of the Wonderbolts gave me a small grin and motioned to her wings with her head.

"Well, you were cheating indeed. It took me like, five hours on foot. But still, it's not that far. And there's a female zebra living in a forest, nearby. Cute one too, from what I've heard."

His ears perked up at the mention of Zecora.

"Uh... Alright, I'll consider it. And what's a train?"

Is he serious?

"Are you serious? ...Ah, whatever, you'll see for yourself, should you choose to come. Now are you gonna help or am I gonna have to... Make you 20% cooler?"

I fought hard the urge of grabbing sunglasses and screaming 'YEEEEAAAAHH' but there were more important things to care about.

"Sweet Celestia, your karma... This is bad, you should try and relax. Anyway, what do you need help with?"

"Well I'm looking for a yellow pegasus. Another one... She was attacked by a Changeling and transported somewhere... Somewhere. I have no idea where."

"Hm, transported somewhere, huh? I did feel a disturbance earlier, it was as if something had been teleported by a special kind of magic."

Special kind of magic? So now there was zebra magic, unicorn magic, alicorn magic -and- Changeling magic? And that wasn't counting the amulets, artifacts and other shit... Or Discord. Or the Elements.  
Wait, why was I even assuming that he was talking about what Chrysalis had done?

He grabbed a book and opened it, starting to flip through pages.

"Here, look at this."

"Yeah, I can't read that."

"Oh right, you're not a zebra."

"Yeah, no kidding."

"You see, this drawing right here? It's-"

"Listen, I don't care what it is. I just wanna find my friend, okay? So assuming whatever you felt might have been her being transported here, is there any chance you could help us find her?"

"I don't think so, but I can walk you to the area where it happened. That's assuming it was her, and not something or someone else... Though such things almost never happen, so it would be highly unlikely to have your friend transported away in such fashion, and have something else appearing around here in the same fashion, much less on the same day."

"Small lead but, better than nothing I guess... Do you have a, uh... Night vision potion? Spell? Something? It's pitch black outside."

"Um, I have torches."

Why do they even have torches? It's not like they can -hold- the damn things...

"Uh, yeah. Spitfire can't hold a torch, and uh, aren't zebras supposed to use magic?"

"We are, but I have nothing about night vision. Maybe in some really ancient books in the basement... Which reminds me, I forgot to clean the-"

"You know what, screw that. Just give us a torch."

He sighed, lit up a torch and gave it to me, and started guiding us out of the cavern. After walking up a few flights of wooden stairs, we ended up outside, coming out of a large tree trunk. It almost looked like I was walking out of Twilight's library or something. The light from the torch wasn't sufficient to search the area thoroughly, but it was enough to see where we were going. We walked for a few minutes until we arrived in front of a large crater.

"This! This is the place, it has to be. You said it was the work of a Changeling, didn't you?"

"The Queen, actually."

"Oh my... Well, it has to be it. You see, Changelings have two types of teleporting spells. Typically they will only use regular spells on themselves, to travel long distances in a short time, phase through walls or even avoid attacks. But those spells only work on themselves, Changeling magic works in very peculiar ways. When it comes to teleporting other creatures or even objects, they have to use something different. Usually they will create a sphere of fire around whatever it is they're trying to teleport, then teleport the sphere itself, rather than what's inside. However, what's inside will also be teleported, and once the sphere reaches its destination, it will slowly float down, and dissipate upon touching solid ground, as not to harm what's being teleported. It will also typically damage the landscape and destroy most things within a twenty to fifty feet radius. There's no doubt that this crater, right here, was created by such a spell. There's no way to be sure it was your friend who was transported here but if it was, you can safely assume she was physically unharmed as she landed."

This sounded awfully familiar. Did they have Terminator in Equestria?

"Now there is no way of knowing where she went, obviously. You'll have to scout for hoof prints, maybe strands of hair caught in bushes, that kind of things. You seem to be a predator anyway, aren't you?"

Hoof prints? Hair caught in bushes? Either he knew Fluttershy, or didn't know normal pegasi could fly...

"Well technically I guess but, we have... Fuck that, just drop by Ponyville some day and you'll learn a lot of stuff. Anyway, thanks... Uh, I didn't quite catch your name?"

"I never told anyone my name. In fact, I don't even remember it myself."

I scratched my head and gave him my best deadpan glare.

"O... 'kay. Well, we'll be going now. Spitfire, you're coming?"

"Right behind you."

I brought the torch above my head and started looking around for hoof prints.

* * *

**_A/N: I'm pretty much winging it but then, I've been winging the entire thing since the very beginning. It was originally a one-shot, and I never planned further than two chapters ahead, except for a few 'ideas' that I thought I could maybe use later on, and those ideas are usually single lines containing twenty words at best, so... Yeah._**  
**_And to complement the intro A/N, here's one thing: you don't -have- to read this story if you don't like it. I appreciate constructive criticism, but reviewing every chapter and writing a big fucking wall of text (similar for each chapter), containing as many insults as it contains grammar / spelling mistakes, isn't exactly constructive. When you read something, you should expect not to agree with all of it. Or any of it. That's fine, I do take even -that- 'feedback' into consideration, but... really. Seriously you guys._**  
**_I'm seriously._**


	15. Starfire

Man, being with Spitfire sure is fun. Although she just can't stop talking about the Wonderbolts, and how much she loves flying and all, it's entertaining and stimulating. It's like being with Rainbow Dash but without the bragging part. She's also pretty helpful by flying overhead, with far better eyesight than me and possessing the huge advantage of having an aerial view of the area my torch illuminates.

We were now walking since over an hour, and there was no sign of hoofprints or anything yet. I was starting to get a bit desperate, knowing that it was unlikely for Fluttershy to have gone so far in the dark, on her own.  
Especially since she didn't receive the effects of the night vision spell.

Suddenly, an idea hit me.

"I'm a moron... Spitfire, we need to retrace our steps."

"What the hay? Why?"

"No hoof prints, and Fluttershy arrived here in complete darkness, I'm pretty sure Chrysalis teleported her before Celestia cast the night vision spell. There's no way in Tartarus she'd have been wandering around on her own in the dark, especially not so far. She must have simply flown into a tree and hidden there."

"Well, there were prints back there."

"What? Hoofprints?"

"No, that's the thing."

"What kind of prints then?"

"I don't know... Something I had never seen before."

"Why didn't you say so?"

"Who cares about what kind of strange creature lives here? We need to find Fluttershy, that's all, right?"

"Yes but... Any lead, no matter how irrelevant it seems, is better than no lead at all. What did those prints look like?"

"Like... I'm not sure. Something elongated that left deep, rugged prints. Probably a heavy creature with some weird anatomy."

"...Were they anything like this?"

I lifted my shoe and she flew back to the ground, and took a look at it.

"Yes, it was pretty much this shape. Not sure about the rugged parts though..."

"Shit. It doesn't make sense, how could humans end up here?"

"You think one of them might have found her?"

"Too likely for my taste. We better go back, quick."

"Quick? Well, I usually don't do that, but... Get on!"

I gave her a dumbfounded look.

"What?"

"C'mon, get on! I'll fly us there!"

"Are you... sure? I'm heavy you know!"

She stifled a laugh, and her face was practically reading 'bitch please, I'm a fucking Wonderbolt'.

I sighed and squatted above her, sitting on her back. She groaned from the weight and tried to take off. She could only hover for a few feet before landing, her legs cracking dangerously.

"You still wanna do this?"

"I just... I need some time to adapt to extra weight, that's all."

I didn't want to hurt her but I knew she wasn't gonna let it go until she was able to do it, and we didn't exactly have much time.

"Well, I guess Wonderbolts aren't so tough then, huh?"

"What?"

"Chrysalis has no problem at all taking off at the speed of light with me on her back, we were over a hundred feet into the air before the smoke from her takeoff even had time to fully dissipate. You know, it's kinda embarrassing for an elite flyer like you to be bested by a filthy insect mutant thingy... Isn't it?"

She gave me a hateful glare, and her mane and tail were as close to catching on fire as they could ever possibly be.

"I don't give a flying feather about that useless excuse of a creature, I'll show you what a real flyer is!"

She screamed in pain as she lifted herself (and me) into the air, flapping her wings as fast and hard as she could. Even from my position I could see the pain in her eyes, but she was flying. Not quite as fast as the average pegasus, but still at a much higher speed than any human could sustain for a several miles run.

"God damn, you're impressive! All it takes is a little taunting to make you overdo yourself... You're like Rainbow Dash. In fact, you should consider dating her or something..."

I mildly chuckled at my 'joke', and I would have been expecting a wingslap or something if she weren't currently flying, but...

"I actually considered it but... It's just... I don't think she swings that way, you know?"

What? Just, what... What.

* * *

_Be strong, ride on! Carry on through the_-

"Hey, we're here!"

"What? Oh... My bad. I didn't see."

"What were you singing?"

"I was singing out loud?"

She laughed. "You sure were."

"Oh. I'm sorry, I was... uh, thinking. And uh. I'm not sure, actually."

"You shouldn't think too much, follow your instincts."

"I screwed up enough so far by thinking, I don't wanna imagine what I would do without..."

"You'd do better."

Maybe she was right. Maybe she wasn't. I could always give it a try...

"So uh, where are those footprints?"

"Right here, if I remember correctly."

She lead me near a tree on the edge of the crater, and I saw footprints. Probably left by heavy boots.

"Okay so, these are footprints alright... Now let's follow them."

She followed me for a while, and after about two miles we ended up finding a cavern. Seriously, just how fucking huge was this forest?  
Spitfire looked at the dark cave, then at me, and swallowed loudly.

"Uh, I think they went inside... You're up for it?"

"Hey, I'm no Wonderbolt but I'm not a pussy either..."

"What's a pussy?"

...Jesus.

"It's something Dash and you should totally be able to get."

"I don't get it."

"I don't get any either, don't worry."

I was holding back a serious giggle, but the worry in her eyes told me that there was more to it than simply wondering what a pussy was.

"What's wrong?"

"I... I'm afraid of enclosed spaces."

"What? Why?"

"I'm a Wonderbolt, my strength is... flying. I feel defenseless in a place where I can't fly."

"Ah, don't worry. Whatever's inside here... I still have my amulet."

"I'm not sure... How does it work anyway?"

"I have no idea, but it allows me to use ice-based magic."

"Well... Can you fight?"

"Uh, to some extent. Though I must say, without that ice magic, I'd be no match against trained soldiers. And I don't have the force field anymore... Hell, no amount of ice is gonna stop sustained gunfire anyway."

"Gunfire?"

"Yeah, you know... Fire, from a gun... Were you even listening during the meeting?"

"I was! But it doesn't mean I was understanding your every word. We don't have those things you were talking about here. Anyway, you're really sure you still wanna go inside?"

"You told me to follow my instincts, and they tell me that I must go."

I was about to start walking inside when she stopped me.

"Wait! I... I need to talk to you."

"What's wrong?"

"You... You said things about Rainbow Dash and me."

"Uh yeah, I was joking! I mean... You guys have a lot in common and all but I wasn't serious."

"Weren't you?"

"No."

"But I... I was, somewhat."

"Really? Do you have a thing for her?"

"No! I mean, yes, I... No! I mean... Argh! I didn't say that!"

"Then what's the deal? I'm not exactly the one to ask when it comes to relationships and all... You know."

I sighed and started trailing off.

"You see, back on Earth, I didn't really have much luck, or even much interest in relationships. Never really found someone I wanted to be with, never truly cared about anyone, in fact. Maybe it was better that way, maybe it-"

I felt a pair of lips brushing against my cheek and staggered backwards, seeing Spitfire hovering next to me.

"What the hell? Try to warn me next time, Jesus! I wasn't expecting that..."

"I'm... I'm sorry, I just wanted to see if... You know, maybe I like stallions, I've never been with one but I've never been with a mare either, though I kinda like Rainbow. Maybe I'm wrong and I'm not like that after all?"

"So you gave me a peck on the cheek to test whether you were attracted to -males- or not?"

"Um... Yes?"

"That's the dumbest thing I've seen since like... Two hours, at least."

"What's dumb about it?"

"Do I look like a -stallion- to you?"

"No, but you're a male."

"But I'm not even part of your species!"

"So what?"

"So... Well I don't know, but whatever you're trying to do is stupid. If you like Rainbow Dash, go for it and don't try to find excuses... I'm not sure if she's into other mares but, if you guys are meant to be, well, true love goes far beyond regard for gender."

"I guess you're right... I just, you know, I'm her idol, I don't wanna have her think I'm some kind of freak or anything..."

"Do you have any idea how flattered she'd be, knowing that her idol has a crush on her?"

She looked down and sighed.

"See, it's all about the way you put it. Anyway, we should really get going... If you have a problem, you can talk to me, but my advices may not be the best in that particular domain."

"Thanks, really it means a lot to me. Sorry I kissed you, I didn't meant to."

"Can't say it was bad, it just... surprised me, is all. Still, you kiss better than Chrysalis."

"What the hay? ...And that's supposed to be a compliment?"

I started laughing. "Now that I think of it... I'm not so sure."

She started laughing as well, and looked at me sternly.

"Say... Is Fluttershy special to you?" she asked, seemingly bracing herself for my reaction.

"What do you mean?"

"You know... Do you have a crush on her?"

"No! I... I mean... I don't know."

"Well to me, it looks like she's very important to you. Did you guys have a few... intimate moments?"

"Well, um... We slept in the same bed a few times, spent some time together and cuddled a bit but... But that's about it... I'm truly scared about what could have happened to her though, I think she matters a lot to me, but I don't really know..."

"Do you get angry when other ponies are around her?"

"No... Maybe. Well there was that one time, at the party Pinkie threw me the first day I got there... There was that stallion, trying to hit on her. I had never felt so... angry, in my life. I just felt the need to protect her. I'm not sure if I just wanted to protect her, or claim her mine... All of this, those are foreign feelings to me. I'm kinda confused."

"It's not very different from me and Rainbow actually... I wanted nothing more than to destroy Lightning Dust for getting her in trouble but I had to remain impartial. Yet I don't really know why I just wanted to protect her, and hurt anypony who'd try to defile her. You think Dash would defend me if I were in trouble?"

"She definitely would." I said, letting out a small chuckle.

"Do you think she... likes me?"

"She totally does. I can't say if she -loves- you, but she definitely likes you. A lot. I promise, if we get out of this, I'll try and help you guys get together."

She smiled and gave me another quick peck on the cheek. I blushed and petted her mane.

"Okay we should get going..."

We entered the cavern. We followed a few tunnels branching into the cavern for a while before seeing a flickering light dancing against a wall.

"Must be a fire... They must be camping or something. Keep it quiet, we can jump them and disarm them."

"You got it."

We slowly made our way to the small room caved in the stone, and as we were about to peek around the corner, my leg bones decided it was the perfect time to crack.

I was about to let out a loud stream of insults related to ethnicity, social class and sexual orientation, when I heard an angry but familiar voice coming from the inside...


	16. The Warrior Inside

"Who's there? Show yourself you meanie!"

That voice... I dropped the torch and rushed inside.

"Holy... FLUTTERSHY!"

"Axel?"

"HOLY FUCK, YOU'RE HERE! AND ALIVE!"

I rushed to her and gave her the most powerful bear hug ever. I could swear I heard her bones crack but I was too caught up in the moment to give a shit. Typical me...

"Are you alright?"

"Ouch... I, uh, I guess I am. What happened?"

I sat down near her and sighed.

"Well, it's a long story..."

Spitfire approached.

"Well we have time, don't we? It doesn't look like we're going anywhere soon."

"Okay, well, it all started when..."

* * *

After nearly an hour, I had explained her everything. Chrysalis, the teleportation spell, the war, Spitfire...  
She thought for a while, then she spoke up.

"The way you described those humans... They sound far more frightening than they really are."

"Some of them found you, didn't they?"

"Yes, and they brought me here. But they were no match for my Stare..."

"Wait, the Stare works on them?"

"It sure does."

She squeed and motioned to two human bodies lying behind a tree log.

"What the... They're dead?"

"Oh my... No, of course not! I told them they needed to be good and rest, being teleported to Equestria was probably tiring. They needed to take a nap. They're sleeping."

"Well I guess you're the Element of Kindness for a reason... You can even tame humans."

"I... um, didn't tame them. They found me and we talked for a while, they were really kind to me. Even before I used the Stare."

"Humans, kind to you?"

"Uh, they, um, they said that I was cute, and that they used to watch something called 'My Little Pony' or something, I think, when they were kids, and that they remembered me... I didn't understand that but, maybe they were just under the shock... Poor little things... Anyway, they clearly didn't seem like they were going to harm me. But after a while, when we stopped talking, I started to feel a bit uncomfortable and um, they had these big pieces of metal you told us about, so uh... and I wanted to be safe anyway so... I used it. I'm sorry."

Bronies. Soldier bronies. In Equestria, twelve years later. Tamed by Fluttershy.  
Too much mindfuck at once... Brain rebooting...

Reboot complete.

She flew up and landed on my shoulders.

"Also, they... Um, they petted me, and uh... I didn't like it. In fact, I think I don't like it unless it's you."

I blushed like mad and Spitfire laughed at us. Suddenly, realization hit me.

"Wait, we gotta wake 'em up! If they're former bronies, then they can join us! Maybe they can even talk sense into the others!"

"What's a brony?"

"Uh, it's, uh... nothing. I mean... I promised Princess Celestia I would explain everything once we'll have won this war, and we're gonna win it. So I'll explain you guys everything. C'mon, let's get outta here."

I kneeled down in front of the two sleeping humans. I softly brushed my hand against them, trying to wake them up without startling them.  
One of them opened his eyes wide and screamed.

"Fuck! What the fuck? Who the fuck are you? Where the fuck am I? Where the fuck's the little fucking pony?"

I grabbed his head in my hands and forced him to face me.

"Hey look, calm down, and ease up on the fucking fucks, alright? She's here. I'm here. I'm uh... Well you don't know me, but that doesn't matter. I'm a friend of Fluttershy's. We're all friends here. There's even another pony. Listen, I don't know what happened, I don't know how you found yourselves here but, there's a war going on out there."

He gave me a 'you serious' look, and motioned to his MP5 laying on the ground.

"No shit?"

"Well I don't know, how'd you guys find yourselves so far from the others?"

"Alright so... Starting from the beginning... We were going through some serious training. Our general said we'd soon go through some kind of futuristic portal leading to a world full of talking horses. He said something about how we needed all the men we could get, because they were expecting hostile resistance or something, I don't know, it sounded like bullshit, all of it. But holy shit... I wasn't expecting to actually land in Equestria! None of us did. I couldn't help but think about it when I heard the 'talking horses' part, and well, I used to be a brony when I was like, fifteen or so... This would have been a dream come true, under other circumstances... But like hell I was gonna murder ponies! Me and my buddy here, we just weren't gonna follow such orders. Orders are orders but this... Hurting innocent sentient beings? We didn't sign up for this shit. Hostile resistance... My ass. So we walked away... And we got lost. Then we found Fluttershy hiding in a tree, we tried to calm her down, got her to follow us and brought her into this cavern, it was cold so we made a fire and all. Then we talked a bit, but I don't really remember about anything else. And I really have no idea how we ended up falling asleep..."

"She used the Stare on you guys... Better safe than sorry I guess, though it might have had something to do with me having told them how dangerous -some- humans could be. Anyway how was it on Earth? I mean, as far as I know, you've been teleported here, you didn't have time to go through the portal on your own, did you?"

"Nah we didn't, we were just training and simulating real-life combat situations, and out of nowhere we heard a deafening explosion. Next thing we knew, most of us had fainted and those who hadn't, like us, were floating in a white void thing... Very bright, it was pretty damn scary. When the light went away, we found ourselves here, in a large meadow in the middle of the night... Everyone was conscious though, we don't exactly know what happened. Even some of our armored vehicles and heavy weaponry was transported here... Then we saw where we were, the pastel colors, the otherwise peaceful scenery... We knew where we were, and we knew we weren't gonna fight. The others were getting in position and we knew what was gonna happen... So we quickly ran in the opposite direction. We heard some magic things and a loud explosion followed by a small earthquake, then we heard flamethrowers being fired... We kept running, knowing too well what would happen to us if we were caught running away... Sometime later we arrived in that forest and... Well, you know what happened next."

By now the other human was starting to wake up as well.

"Uh, yeah, I'll explain everything I know later, and why I'm here. Okay guys, listen to me. There are some things that need clearing, particularly, how time works here. You see, I was the only human here for... four days, I think. Something like that. But on Earth, twelve years passed. I arrived here four days ago or so, yet when I left Earth, it was the year 2013. As we speak, it's probably already 2026... Also, try not to talk about bronies or anything, I promised all the ponies I would explain them how some of us humans know about them, but now's not the time."

"You got it."

The other human looked at me before speaking.

"2013? Wow... I was still a kid back then!"

The first human cut him off.

"This is really interesting and all but, don't we have a war to fight? Or, to prevent, actually?"

I looked at Fluttershy, concerned.

"Fluttershy, did you have time to go through with your training, before Chrysalis striked?"

"Yes, Iron Will said I was ready. I feel a bit more assertive than before, too. But I didn't have time to finish my training with Spitfire..."

"It doesn't matter, we have firepower now. Say, you guys are with us, right?"

Both humans nodded.

"What's your names?"

The first human answered, "Uh, my name's Kevin, and this is my buddy Brian. I'm not sure if I wanna go and kill the other guys but... I definitely don't wanna hurt no ponies. So as far as I'm concerned, we're with you."

Fluttershy squeed and I shook both their hands.

"Alright, name's Axel. You already know Fluttershy, and I assume you know Spitfire, but in case you don't... There, now you do."

"Hey." Spitfire said, still looking a bit scared. I patted her on the head and started talking.

"Don't you guys think we could get the other humans to... Act more resonable about all this? I mean, what's the point in attacking and spoiling such a beautiful land? And why'd they want to -attack- instead of trying to make contact, once they had discovered the portal?"

"No idea, we're just soldiers, it's not like we're told such things..." Kevin said, sighing.

"Probably some shitty excuse to kill and conquer, you know what the thirst for power can do to a man... Anyway, we need to find the others and stop them... If our general doesn't agree to stop, we'll cap the bastard. And the others too, if we have to." said Brian, looking more determinated than his friend.

I was starting to like these guys, I could only wish they were for real.

"I think we all five should get going... Go back to Canterlot, and try to end this shit before it gets out of hand."

They all nodded and got up, following me.

We walked for a while but what I hadn't realized was that, while I could retrace my steps up to the exit of the zebra's shelter, I was totally unable to figure out where the moving rock was, let alone find the exit of this thick forest.

"Well fellas, looks like we're lost... Anyone got a compass or something?"

Before either of them could answer, and before I could realize I had no fucking clue how a compass would be any useful to us in Equestria, especially not knowing where anything is located, Spitfire started laughing.

"What's so funny?"

"The night is crystal clear! I'll just fly above the trees and I should probably be able to see Canterlot from here."

"Oh. Well alright, go ahead then."

She took off and disappeared above the dense foliage.

"Can you see anything?" I shouted.

"I think so... Yep! It's right this way, come on, we need to get going."

We started walking again, in the direction Spitfire was leading us, and soon we came out of the forest. I started to recognize the landscape.

"Alright, I remember this area. It should take us a good four hours until we get there... I just hope we can make it in time."

Kevin spoke up.

"I was thinking, don't you guys have magic? You should be able to defend yourselves, right?"

I sighed.

"It appears that humans are mostly immune to magic... At least offensive magic. We can stall them but we can't do anything in return. Eventually they'll win, we have a force field around Canterlot and various bullet-deflecting spells but such large scale defensive spells take a lot of energy to maintain up and running, while all humans have to do is wait. I doubt they're dumb enough to waste all of their ammo in the first few hours... Plus, after Princess Celestia teleported all of you guys here, she practically passed out from the sheer amount of energy it took her to do so. Say, don't you guys have a spare sidearm?"

Brian tossed me a M1911. "Here, keep it. Hope you know how to use it, though."

"Thanks man. I hope I know how, too."

We all laughed engaged in small talk for the remnant of the trip back to Canterlot. Apparently those two dudes were strongly against the idea of war, and were in the military because they never found anything else to do in life. I could almost relate to them...

About two miles away, I could make out the large glowing sphere around the castle. However, I couldn't see or hear anything, as if the soldiers were gone. I stopped and scratched my head.

"What's going on? Do you guys see anything? It's like they're gone..."

"Maybe they moved? We're still a bit too far anyway, let's get a little closer." Brian said, apparently eager to get there.

"Wait." Kevin said. He took out a pair of binoculars and handed them to his friend. "Do you see anything?"

"Nah, they must have moved... C'mon, let's keep moving, too!"

We walked for another mile or so, before finally arriving on the fields where I had fought earlier that day. Or the day before? It's hard to keep track of time when walking for a dozen hours in eternal night. I was sure happy about that anti-fatigue spell, though.

There was nothing. No humans, no ponies, no signs of battle... Nothing.

"What the hell happened here? Where are they? No signs of battle, no spent ammo cases, no bullet holes, not a single hint of fire of explosions or anything, just... Nothing..."

Before I could think any further, I felt a sharp stinging pain in my shoulder. I looked at it only to see a needle planted into it, and my vision started to blur.

"Tranquilizers! GET THE FUCK DOWN!"

I tried to reach for my pistol, but Fluttershy getting hit in the neck by another dart was the last thing I saw before passing out.

* * *

**_A/N: I didn't mention it but obviously Kevin and Brian have equipment, including flashlights etc., explaining how we could easily navigate through the forest. I don't feel like going in-depth about their background on Earth, they're just soldiers, they're following orders..._**


	17. Fallen World

I awoke on the ground, with a serious headache.

"Uh... Where am I?"

I opened my eyes, only to see three familiar faces nearby. Spitfire and the two humans.

"What happened? Where's Fluttershy?"

Brian spoke.

"She's here, don't worry she's alright, but she's still sedated..."

"What happened?"

"You two got hit by tranquilizer darts, Fluttershy's probably gonna be out for several hours, it was designed for humans and she's so light... But she'll be fine, don't worry."

"I'll carry her... Where are we?"

"Same place we got attacked..."

"Urgh... My head! How long was I out?"

"About an hour. Does daylight ever come in this place?"

"No, I personally asked Princess Luna to keep the Moon up for several days, to give us an advantage... We all had night vision spells and all, but I don't think it made much of a difference in the end... Who attacked us anyway?

You guys didn't get hit, right?"

"Well um... It was a friend of ours, actually. He said he-"

"Lemme explain, please! Like, I didn't mean to!" said a panicked voice I didn't recognize.

I saw a short, blonde guy with glasses and a military outfit, walking up to me and waving his hands around frantically.

"Please, give me a chance to uh, like, explain, you know? Please!"

I blinked and stared at him.

"I'm not gonna eat you, go ahead and explain. You shot us?"

"I... I'm sorry, like, okay? I, uh, I was just..."

Kevin sighed and put his hand on the small dude's shoulder.

"Dave, I think you should calm down, and explain everything from the beginning, alright? We told you, they're not hostile. Spitfire nearly tore you a new one but eh, it's cool now. Isn't it?"

The fiery maned pegasus smirked, and 'Dave' eventually calmed down and managed to explain.

"So uh, like, you see, we were getting attacked by some ice-based magic, or something, right? A flying creature was shooting frozen shit at us and it kinda kept thawing out right away, you know? At first we thought it was meant to, you know? But then the creature, like, retreated, so uh, we realized it wasn't affecting us the way it should, right? Then we got a little more confident, but many, many more flying creatures came and started attacking us, like attacking us, for real, you know? We were still somewhat immune to it but we were confused, not knowing what to do. Like, our general kept screaming for us to shoot but... None of us really wanted to shoot. Those things couldn't harm us, and they looked even more frightened than us, you know? It took us about one hour before we finally decided to uh... kinda... shoot. With that."

He pulled out of his backpack what looked like a sawed-off rifle modified to fire tranquilizer darts. It looked really weird.

"We uh... we shot our general with that, right, so he'd finally shut the fuck up, you see? Then we kinda... Like, retreated. We didn't want to fight, you know? None of us did. We ain't cowards you know, but it just didn't seem... like, right, you know? Some of us said they knew where we were, and that the creatures weren't, like, hostile, although they were attacking... You know?"

So it was all my fault, since the very beginning? Assuming -all- humans would be hostile... It took all my strength to maintain a decent poker face and not spill the beans out of guilt.

Dave finished his story.

"You know? So the others were retreating, you see? And I suddenly had the need to go and take a fat one. So uh, I kinda, like, went inside a bush and dropped my pants, well, you know, I'm not gonna go in-depth, right? And then I heard a weird distorded noise, followed by a loud explosion and a bright flash of light, then a thunder-like rumbling kept resonating for like, one minute, like, it was crazy, you know? But I wasn't finished, right? So, like, I couldn't get out or see what had just happened, you know? When I got done wiping it, you know, I, like, walked out of the bush, and uh, they were all gone! Nothing, no one... Everything was gone! It was crazy dude! So I kinda panicked and uh, like, hid in the bush. I stayed there for a few hours and then you guys came, and I heard you but, like, I didn't know what it was, right? So I took my rifle and I figured, better safe than sorry, you know? Before I could see Kevin and Brian, I had already shot twice, right? I've always been a good shot but, you know? Like... When I saw the guys, I had already shot you both, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, you know?"

I stared at him for a while. He winced and started giggling nervously.

"You, uh... Like, you understand, right?"

I took a deep breath and tried to mimic his voice.

"Yeah. I understand... See, uh, I kinda, like, you know, right?"

"What?"

Everyone but him burst into laughter. After a few minutes of laughing, we calmed down and started to get up. I picked up Fluttershy and kept her in my arms as we started walking forward, towards Canterlot. I patted him on the back.

"Hey no offense dude, it's just that... Can you make one sentence without going like 'uh like kinda you know'?"

"Uh... You know, it's just, like, the way I talk, you know?"

I muffled a laugh. "Old habits die hard uh?"

"Guys, what the fuck?" Kevin interrupted us.

"What?" I asked, before turning my head towards where his finger was pointing to.

"What the fuck is this?"

We walked up to a gigantic crater. It was probably a hundred feet large and about twenty feet deep.  
I stopped dead in my tracks and images started to appear in my mind. I closed my eyes and tried to remember where I was when I 'iced' Chrysalis. I walked around until I found a smaller crater, about ten feet wide and two feet deep.

"Did she... No, it's impossible! She couldn't have done that... They're immune anyway... No they're not! She fucking phased with me on her back, and it worked on me too! She... No fucking way! Why the hell would have she done that anyway?"

I turned around to see all the guys and Spitfire looking at me incredulously.

"I... I think I might know what happened! It would make no sense but... I don't see any other explanation. I mean, I doubt this could have been made bys an asteroid or something landing right there."

"What?" Spitfire asked.

"Chrysalis... She... She sent them away! The crater, it was made by Changeling magic. She sent them all away!"

"What? No way, why would she do that? And where would she send them?"

"I don't know, I..."

What the hell was I thinking with that theory? Anyway she...

Wait a minute.  
I had told them they could feed on the humans' hate. She looked desperate for a second chance a split second before I was done 'taking care' of her... Could an evil, deceiving Changeling queen be able to grasp the concept of redemption?

"Guys, the hive! We gotta go back! We gotta... uh... Where was it already?"

Spitfire flew on my shoulder and gave me a concerned look.

"Hey, you okay? You're still under the effects of the tranquilizer I think... You should sit down, and calm down. What are you rambling about anyway?"

"No I'm not! My mind's clear! See the giant crater? It was made by the magic Changelings use to teleport stuff around. Chrysalis sent them all away. She must have sent them into the Changelings' hive!"

"I still don't believe she'd ever do such a thing, and even then, how is it any relevant to us?"

"I... I don't even know anymore what we're supposed to do... Dave!"

"Yes?"

"You said you and the guys weren't gonna fight, right? You were gonna retreat or something?"

"Yeah totally, but I was in that bush, taking a fat-"

"Yeah yeah, yeah. I know, I know. But when you saw they were gone, was the crater here already?"

"I... Uh, I don't know? I didn't pay attention..."

"Great..."

Spitfire wrapped her left wing around my head and forced me to look at her.

"C'mon, get a grip! You're our leader, you can't just stand there and wait, or just stare at nothing in disbelief! Do something!"

"I'm trying! I'm trying, alright? Okay so... If the humans are gone, then the ponies and other creatures must be inside the castle or something. As long as they're inside, they should be safe, even with Celestia still out of commission. No, she's not hurt or anything, she's just... Sleeping. For a few days. Don't ask. Anyway, we shouldn't worry about them, they're most likely safe. We should worry about the other humans, after all I don't think they signed up for this shit. If they weren't gonna fight, chances are they'll keep that way unless something changes... And Chrysalis is sure to fuck everything up. She always does. Assuming they are inside the hive, we have to go there and set things right. Bring them back, explain what's going on, and then... Wait until the princess wakes up, and then we'll see. Any questions?"

Brian raised a hand.

"Yeah?"

"That's the best solution you found? 'Cause uh, that's the dumbest thing I heard in a long time."

I frowned and sighed.

"Well, you're free to come up with a better idea. Any other question?"

Spitfire raised a hoof.

"Yes?"

"Where's the hive?"

"...That's the problem. When Shining Armor and Princess Cadence escorted me there, Shining teleported us there. Then, he teleported us back to the castle. I have no idea where the hive is located. And maybe-"

I stopped when I felt Fluttershy twitch in my arms. She was slowly waking up.

"Fluttershy! Guys, she's waking up!"

"Yeah we see, we're right here you know?"

Ignoring them, I hugged her tighter and patted her mane.

"You okay?"

She yawned and opened her eyes slowly, looking at me.

"Oh my... What happened?"

"Someone shot us... By mistake."

I turned around and sighed.

"Meet Dave, the faggot who sedated us both."

The blonde guy walked up to us, shifting uncomfortably, and scratched the back of his head.

"Uh, I'm, uh, like.. Totally sorry, you know?"

The shy pegasus jumped off my arms and hovered in front of Dave, crossing her front hooves.

"I hope you are sorry. You acted irrationally and immaturely. That's no way to get ahead in life. You should be ashamed of yourself, mister."

I started grinning, while Brian and Kevin were laughing hard. They looked at each other.

"Told you dude, best pony."

"Shit man, I'm starting to think you were right all those years..."

Dave was still shifting, and shuffling his feet awkwardly.

"C'mon Dave man, it's not a big deal. Now we gotta find the hive and see what we can do... Maybe we should just go back to the castle and give them a sitrep? And ask for the location of the hive."

They all nodded, but I felt like it was more out of politeness than anything. I frowned awkwardly and looked at the female Wonderbolt.

"Spitfire, what do you think? After all, you were the one supposed to be in charge outside, since Discord decided to-"

I stopped dead in my tracks and let out a small yelp as a bright flash of light blinded us all.

* * *

**_A/N: Yes, Dave was meant to be as annoying as possible. I mean, I 'created' him and making him talk already pisses me , short chapter is short, but I'll post the next one before September, I promise._**


	18. Body Breakdown

**_A/N: Sorry for the small chapter, but I had to include some Discord randomness. I just had to. There will be more later on, though.  
_**

* * *

My vision slowly returned, and I blinked as I saw a strange creature standing before us. Before the guys could raise their weapons, the creature snapped his fingers, and both submachine guns turned into a goat horn, and a deer antler, respectively.

I looked at Discord, who had now two MP5s on his head, and stifled a laugh.

"You haven't changed a bit, have you?"

"Oh, au contraire, my friend. I have changed, quite a lot. Don't you see my new horns? They're pretty... Classy, I would say. Isn't that right, Fluttershy?"

The yellow pegasus looked at the draconequus, grinning.

"They're pretty nice."

"You see... I might just offer Celestia one of these things. So much better than her lame crown... How'd you call them again?"

"Weapons. Listen Discord, I'm gonna ignore the fact you tricked everypony into believing I had put you in charge, but-"

He wrapped himself around me, turning into a duck buoy in the process. I sighed and stared at his 'face'. He giggled.

"Oh, but you did... Didn't you? Hm, I must have heard things... How silly of me!"

He turned back into normal, gave the guys their weapons back and flew away from me. I'll never get used to this guy's antics... Fluttershy gave him an angry glare. He noticed it and smiled wider than I thought was physically possible.

"What's wrong, Fluttershy? Are you scared for the fate of your little friend? You know I wouldn't hurt him, right? Or... Are you jealous?"

He snapped his fingers and instantly looked like a female, with a long red dress, make-up and everything. The three humans started laughing and I pinched the bridge of my nose, sighing again.  
He 'kneeled' in front of me and took my hand in his paws.

"Discord, God damn it, knock it off! This is serious, we need to talk, shit has happened!"

He frowned, turned back to normal and started talking, imitating Twilight Sparkle's voice.

"Whatever do you mean, 'feces happened'? Feces do happen, it's a normal bodily function that..."

I grabbed my M1911 and tried to fire a shot into the air.

"...the excess waste then makes its way to the colon and then-"

I lowered the pistol and looked at it like a moron. After removed the safety, I raised it again, this time firing it. Discord jumped a few feet into the air and changed his voice back to normal.

"Woah! Holy me... So that's what those things do? It's much more impressive up close. I gotta get me one of these... Or several."

"Okay so, now that I have your undivided attention, can you please tell us what's going on? Did you guys all retreat? Did you see the humans go away?"

"You're lucky you have found me here, because I'm the only one who knows what really happened." he grinned, and spawned a monocle, a pipe and a classy vintage hat.

"Like hell we're lucky, you just saw us and came here."

He put a paw to his heart and lowered his head.

"I'm hurt, really... Fluttershy, tell your little friend here that I'm not what he thinks I am..."

She looked at me and sighed. Discord snorted and looked away.

"Fine, fine. I saw the green little insect, I saw what she did to them... Perfect waste of grass, if you ask anypony else, but as for me... This crater is magnificent! After you guys are gone, I'm gonna fill it with cider and bathe in it. So glorious... If only Celestia... would join me..."

Spitfire laughed.

"Ha, in your dreams!"

The draconequus stared at her and sighed, looking genuinely hurt.

"Maybe you're right, little bright yellow flying thingy."

"I have a name, you know."

"I know."

I sighed for what felt like the sixty-ninth time in a few minutes, and gave all of them a stern look.

"Guys, can we get on with it? Discord, continue your story please?"

After muttering something about how we were boring and always trying to make sense, he finished his explanation.

"So in the end, this little Changeling brat, she sent them all away. Far, far away. In her hive, probably... Hm, how kinky is that?"

Even I couldn't refrain from laughing this time.

"Even though it's oddly uncharacteristic of me, I went and reported to Celestia. Well, I tried to, but she was taking a nap... Typical, she turns everyone into stone, but when she's needed, she's sleeping... Humph! I hate her."

"Clearly you do, that's totally why you wanna bathe in champagne with her."

"Champagne?"

"Uh, I'm sorry, you said cider. Right, cider, nevermind."

"What's champagne? It sounds... Classy. Sounds like something your little friend Rarity would enjoy, I'm sure."

"Yeah yeah, whatever. Anyway, who did you report to then?"

"I went and tried to explain Luna, but you know how she is. Thou that, we art this, her language is a bit... Off-putting. I mean, look at me? I was imprisoned in stone for a far longer time than she was on the Moon, and I wasn't stuck with millennia-old language, now was I?"

"No, but you could hear and see everything from where you were, she was alone, away from any sort of communication with the outside world."

"Still, she's not classy at all. And anyway, she didn't believe me, either."

"So, that's why you said you're the only with the correct version of what happened, because you're the only one who saw it, and nopony else would believe you?"

He turned himself into what looked like a buzzer, straight out of your typical TV quiz show, and 'he' rang.

"Ding, ding, ding! I'm sorry, but... This is a correct answer!"

He exploded into fireworks and re-appeared as his normal self.

"Uh... Okay. So where's the hive, exactly? In fact, would you mind teleporting us here?"

"No, I wouldn't mind."

"Then please do it."

"No."

"Discord... You said you wouldn't mind."

"I wouldn't. I didn't say I would do it, though."

Fluttershy flew up to him and looked at him in the eyes.

"Could you do it for me?"

"Ah, Fluttershy... Your methods won't work on me anymore. I don't need your friendship, I'm yearning for much, much more now..."

He cracked into maniacal laughter as thunder rolled in the distance, and Kevin readied his sidearm. I noticed it and put a hand on his arm.

"Hey, it's Discord, remember? He's crazy but... Not dangerous. Not anymore, at least. It's not like you could harm him with that, either..."

"I... I don't think I ever saw him that crazy, even in The Return Of Harmony."

"Yeah me neither, being free really works wonders for him... For him. Not for the others."

The draconequus looked at us and sighed.

"Fine, I will teleport you there, if you do something for me first."

I sighed again. Discord asking for something? This couldn't be good...

"Shoot."

"Spitfire stays here."

"What? Uh, okay... That's all? That's not even something one can 'do'. Was that it?"

"No."

"...Then what was it?"

"Well, Spitfire -will- stay here, you don't need her. We, however, do. Ponies have been worrying sick about her, you know how they are... So conformist and boring. And naïve, they all believed me, after all. Anyway, what I want... When you're back, you explain me what this champagne thing is, and where I can get some."

"Dude! I have no idea how it's made, exactly. Plus, you're some God-like entity or something, you can create everything you want!"

"That much is correct... But how would I know if I created the right thing?"

"Argh, fine! When we're back, I explain you roughly what champagne is, and I help you test whatever is it that you create, and tell you once you get it right."

"Hmm..."

"And I'll let you have the patent on it."

"Hmm, hmm..."

"And I'll ask Celestia if she wants to take a bath in it with you! God damn it, I can't do more! Do we have a deal or what?"

"No."

Before any of us could insult him, he snapped his fingers and a bright light engulfed us all.

* * *

**_A/N: I know that's a lot of bright lights and all but I honestly can't think of anything else when I try to imagine what random magic-related things (stuff appearing, teleporting, etc.) could possibly look like._**


	19. Disciples Of Babylon

Shielding my eyes from the intense brightness, I yelled to no one in particular.

"God, I'm getting seriously sick of all these flashes of light all the time! What's going on now?"

A now familiar male voice boomed.

"Ho, ho ho. You can take a look around now."

"Discord... So you did teleport us, huh? Right, this is the hive, this-"

No more words could come out of my mouth when I caught a glimpse of what the self-proclaimed God of Chaos. He was wearing a leather jacket, black sunglasses and had a row of 40mm grenades strapped around his 'chest'.

He reached for something on his back, and pulled out a weapon, which he proceeded to load with one of the grenades. Before I could stop him, he took aim and fired the M79 at the magical barrier protecting the hive.

The explosive projectile harmlessly ricocheted off the force field and landed on the ground. I sighed in relief and Discord started laughing.

"Your human weaponry is weak."

"Actually, it's designed not to blow up at such close ranges. You'd have killed us all, you dickhole."

"Ho ho, that rhymes."

...That guy. That fucking guy. I couldn't even tell whether I was enjoying his shenanigans, or if they were really starting to get on my nerves.

"Where the hell did you get that thing anyway?"

"There was a battle, you know. Before your little insect friend decided to take matters into her own hooves, we actually fought. Well, they did. I was enjoying some nice chocolate milk with that little pink pony."

"She's not my friend. And still, that doesn't explain how you got your... paws, on a damn grenade launcher."

"Some of us grabbed some of the humans' weapons, and brought them back to the castle. Just like you told us to do, remember? I wanted to try these things out but, meh. They're meant to be reliable. And safe. And all... aren't they? How predictable... and lame, really, war isn't all that chaotic, after all. I'm seriously bored here."

"I'm not even gonna try to explain you how modern warfare works, instead I'll just thank you for teleporting us here, and uh... That's all. Now how the hell do we go back to the castle from here?"

He did not answer, instead slowly backing up, cocking a Winchester 1887 he had just pulled out, seemingly out of nowhere.

"Discord? How do we get back?"

He put on a weird accent and smirked in a very, very disturbing way.

"...I'll be back."

He snapped his fingers and disappeared. Apparently Pinkie had taught him many things about fucking giant gaping holes straight into the fourth wall...

I took a look around and noticed that everyone was here, except Spitfire. The three guys were standing there, bewildered, and Fluttershy was hovering a few feet above the ground, looking a bit scared. I walked up to her and gently caressed her mane.

"Don't worry, we're gonna be alright. You know how he is. Anyway now, let's get in and... Ah, shit. I forgot."

She looked up at me apprehensively.

"What... What's wrong?"

"Ponies can't get through the magical barrier... And there's no way in Tartarus I'm leaving you here alone."

"But I... oh... Hey, what is that?"

I raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

She landed on the ground and pointed her hoof at something behind me.

"Look! It's that thing Discord had!"

I kneeled down and grabbed the grenade launcher, as well as the 'grenade belt' Discord had strapped around his midsection.

"Hm... The force field is supposed to prevent ponies and other various creatures from getting in, eh? I don't think a grenade qualifies as a creature. Might as well try... It's worth a shot."

The guys backed away and I took a few steps back myself, loading the weapon and aiming. Truth be told, this was going to be my first time ever firing a weapon at an actual target.  
And second time ever firing a weapon.

"Fluttershy, stay behind me, it's gonna get a little... noisy."

I stood about forty feet away from the barrier and raised the Thumper to eye level. Not bothering to aim, or even unfold the leaf sights, I simply pointed it away from me and pulled the trigger.

Time froze as I saw the grenade leaving the barrel and travelling towards the green bubble-like barrier. It did not explode, nor did it penetrate.  
It simply got 'stuck' in the force field, in mid-air, surrounded by a bright green magical force, like a rock in a giant blob of jelly.

"Well, at least I tried.. Looks like we're gonna have to-"

Once again I stopped talking when I saw the grenade starting to smoke and emit small sparks.

"Uh-oh... Guys? Better get down."

Brian walked towards the explosive projectile and laughed.

"What are you talking about, man? It's not armed, if it didn't explode upon impact then it won't-"

He was cut off as a powerful explosion shattered the magical barrier, and a small shockwave threw all of us backwards.

"Woah, what the fuck? I thought... How did it..."

I got up, brushed my dirt-stained pants and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Magic, man. It makes everything act strangely... I stopped trying to understand anything about it mere hours after arriving here."

I looked at my four partners.

"Well guys, looks like we're clear. Let's get inside and see what's really going on..."

Fluttershy flew up to me and landed on my shoulder. She squeed and nuzzled my cheek.

"This was so awesome! Huge fireball and everything, and it broke through! Can I have one of these?"

I gave her an incredulous look.

"You want a grenade?"

"If... if that's okay with you, I mean."

"Well uh, sure, I guess, but it's useless without the launcher."

"Please? Just a little grenade."

So there I was, in a magical foreign dimension, with a cartoon pegasus giving me puppy eyes for a 40mm grenade.  
Why the hell am I here again?

"Alright, here."

I ripped one of the grenades from the belt and gave it to her. She squeed again and wrapped her right wing around my head. As cute as it was, I couldn't see much. She quickly noticed that and withdrew her feathery appendage before blushing. I gave her a small peck on the cheek and wiped the sweat off my brow.

"Okay, let's go people. Stay frosty. And keep a hand near your weapons, we don't know what's going on in those tunnels..."

They all nodded and followed me. I tried to remember where I went the first time around, but apparently we had gotten inside through a different entrance. However, before we could get far, Chrysalis burst through a wall and aimed her horn at us.

The three guys readied their weapons, Fluttershy jumped down and hid behind me, and I instinctively raised my hands, a blue aura forming around them.

She looked at me and turned her gaze away.

"Oh, it's... you."

"Yeah, it's me. Last I checked, I was the only one who could get inside your lair without being... invited."

"That would be right, if you hadn't broken the barrier."

"How do you know about that?"

"Who do you think keeps this barrier up? I can feel anything that happens with my magic, a giant ape shattering it with an explosive device is no exception."

"Okay so, maybe we're gonna save the formalities for later. Are the others here?"

"The others? Oh, you mean... The others of your kind? Those who did -not- trap me in ice twice within two days? Yes. They're here."

I sat down in front of her, tired of standing up and walking around since over a day straight, and I and crossed my arms.

"Explain yourself. What you did, what happened, and why."

"I... Why does this matter?"

"You fucked me over. In fact, you fucked -all- of us over, and now apparently you're trying to help? After being around Discord for a few minutes, I've had enough nonsense for several years, so now I'd like to actually understand what's going on. So... You, are going to tell me. Right?"

She scoffed and looked at the three guys, their weapons still trained on her. I rolled my eyes, getting the hint.

"Guys, lower your weapons, I got this, it's cool. So, Chrysalis, I'm listening."

The soldiers complied and the queen took a deep breath, dropping her head.

"Alright... I was so blinded by this power you could give to me, I guess I didn't think rationally... When you first came to ask me to help, what you did, it was the first time in over a century a creature actually gave me love without me having to coax it out of them. It was genuine and... It was so intense. I wanted more. I needed more. I was so obsessed with that, I took off to the castle as soon as I could and I went and looked around, trying to come up with a plan. I was quick to pick up on your... attraction to Fluttershy. So I... I did what I had to do. What I thought I had to do. I eventually realized it was wrong, but it was too late... You still needed her, or in that case, me, to carry you into battle. If anything, I saved your life, the real Fluttershy would have dropped to the ground after that shockwave, and you'd have plummeted a hundred feet to your death."

"The concentrated ice beam was foolish, I give you that much, but... Why did you bring the humans here?"

"You couldn't fight them, you couldn't contain them... All you could do was stalling them. I thought, maybe if I helped, you would forgive me..."

"I'm not too keen on forgiving you, after compromising everything, and especially after what you did to Fluttershy. But we'll see about that, now we need to find them. Aren't they scared or something? According to our friends here, most of the others weren't exactly willing to fight in the first place, and I'm guessing they're getting nervous right now, wherever they are. What did you do to them exactly?"

"I simply teleported them in the highest security area of the hive, a sealed room only I can open. I also destroyed most of their equipment, including those strange giant metal carriages, whatever those are."

"Nice move, I guess. So, let's go see them? We got a lot of things to sort out."

"Fine. Come with me, but don't expect me to-"

"Listen, just take us to them. We'll see later for the rest."

She nodded and started lazily flying down a tunnel, followed by the five of us. After a few hundred yards, we arrived in front of a giant room, sealed by a dark green membrane of some sort. The walls were black and glistening, covered by a thin, slimy green substance, not unlike the door seal. About a hundred humans were sitting on the ground, about a dozen of them looking mildly bored, the others seemingly frightened.

The queen opened the seal by prodding it with her horn, motioned for us to go inside, and started walking back in the opposite direction. We slowly entered the room and the three guys rushed over to their 'friends'. While watching them talk, explain to each other what had happened and everything, I was starting to ponder over what exactly had led me to lose hope in humanity to the point I wouldn't even have considered the possibility of humans being friendly...

Maybe Chrysalis was right, and it was my fault all along... I sat down cross-legged and waited for them to finish talking, occasionally glancing at the yellow pegasus sitting behind me, visibly scared by the sheer amount of humans present in the room.

Brian eventually finished his explanations.

"...and then, that little bitch ended up using the Stare on us! Can you believe that? Impossible to be mad at her though, she's just too damn cute."

One of the other soldiers let out a gasp.

"Wait, you mean, she's here? Like, the real Fluttershy?"

A good twenty soldiers rose to their feet, looking around for the timid pony.

"Yes, she's right behind-"

I quickly stood up and put my hands in front of me.

"Wait, wait. She's shy, remember? Calm down, guys."

She slowly took a peek from behind my right thigh, and backed away when she saw the forty or so eyes trained on her. Most of the humans started walking towards me, and I once again put my hands up, this time using magic to make them glow a light blue.

"Woah, woah, woah. Back the fuck up!"

Most of them recoiled and the others started to talk rapidly and indistinctively. I could make out a few words here and there, such as 'magic', 'what the fuck' and 'no way dude'.

"Guys, for real, you all need to calm down. I know you're all asking yourselves a lot of questions but I guarantee you, they will be answered in due time. Now, whoever wants to fight, hurt ponies and spoil this beautiful land, raise your hands."

A single one of them raised his hand, but before he could even fully extend his arm, he was knocked out cold by three consecutive punches thrown at him by three different soldiers.

"Okay so, I take it that you guys are with us. What about your general? Brian said he wouldn't hear anything and kept trying to get you guys to actually fight, is that right?"

Everyone went silent as a dark silhouette rose to its feet from behind the crowd. 'He' slowly walked forward, and looked absolutely gigantic. On his chest, a copious amount of medals and decorations were adorning his fancy jacket. He had short, dark grey hair, an unlit cigar in his mouth, a scar along his left cheek, and a glare that could melt steel. He walked up to me and put his arms akimbo, definitely towering above my rather short stature. He was almost as tall as Discord... Well, maybe not, but definitely close to seven feet. And probably three hundred pounds at the very least. He spat his cigar out, crushed it under his boot, and took a deep breath.


	20. Last Man Stands

"So... I have heard that you were the one who caused all this trouble. You have attacked us. Doing so, you have betrayed your kind. Your country. Your planet."

Determined to show him I wasn't afraid of his status, or stature, I put my arms akimbo and faced him, frowning.

"You're not 'my kind'. And wait, what? My country? What the hell are you talking about? We're not even from the same country."

"Son, you will talk when prompted to."

"Alright now listen, cockbite. I could care less about who you are, what you want, or how things are like where you come from. You're in Equestria now. You see, here, you don't make the rules. So if I were you, I'd just take a big step back, lest an ungodly fucking firestorm rains upon me. I mean, you."

Knowing that I had magic in my arsenal, I wasn't really scared of this guy... But God damn, he was fucking humongous.

He put a hand on my shoulder and grinned.

"Amusing. You do not seem to know who I am, exactly... now, do you?"

"Uh, I can take a wild guess. But the fact is, it doesn't matter who you are. As I said, you're not on Earth anymore. You can forget about everything you were used to. And right now, you're in no position to threaten anyone."

I pushed his hand away and crossed my arms.

"Just look at you... Why the hell would you ever want to bring war here? For what purpose? There's nothing here that you could harvest or sell. There's no one that you want revenge on. There's simply nothing for you here. You don't know what the hell you're up against. Your entire army is against the idea of even taking the safety off on their weapons... And you're trying to conquer this land? You ain't right in the head, man."

Letting the words sink into him, I swallowed nervously and turned my gaze away from him. I felt a bead of sweat forming on my forehead as I turned around and began to walk away, asserting my lack of fucks to give about whatever it was that he intended on trying to do.  
I hadn't walked two yards when I heard a telltale 'click' and felt cold steel pressing against the back of my neck. His deep, gravelly voice rang into my ears once again, this time making me come dangerously close to soiling my pants.

He let out a throaty chuckle when the sound of several dozens of guns being cocked echoed through the room.

"You know, kid, sometimes... life can be funny. Here you are, giving me your little speech, and thinking that you had the upper hand... Simply because things are different here, you thought you could tell me anything you wanted, and walk away with it. You thought I was just gonna buy it, and leave you alone. But you forgot some of the most rudimentary principles of war. So there, you just turn around, not even expecting me to retaliate or anything. Besides the fact that you're a short, fat little kid, you haven't seen the things I saw. You haven't lived the things I lived. You haven't fought. You haven't killed. My boy... If whoever rules this land is counting on you to defend it, they're in for some serious trouble."

I heard another clicking sound as he cocked his weapon, before talking to the crowd.

"You have disappointed me. All and every single one of you. This... kid, here, has managed to pin you down? And without a weapon? At least, it makes me feel better about sending you into the meat grinder everytime. You are all expendable. All of you. You see, that's why you're mere soldiers. Unable to think for yourselves... Beyond following orders, there's not much you're qualified to do. And this time, you seem to have failed to do even that."

One of them raised a hand and shouted.

"Who the fuck would want to listen to your bullshit orders? Get the fuck down there, you old bastard! You've lost it, you're gone!"

Before I could realize that he had taken the gun away from me, I heard a loud noise and a few screams. I tried to turn my head around but the (now painfully hot) barrel of the pistol was once again pressing against my neck.

Dave, who had remained silent since over an hour, spoke uneasily.

"You... you won't get away with this. This is like, murder, you know? This isn't right, man!"

I could literally 'feel' the general smirk.

"I know... That's part of why I like it. Now listen carefully. You will obey. Unless somebody else wants a bullet in the head, I suggest you all do what you were trained to do. Following MY orders."

As I was beginning to think about magic, I also remembered that he could probably see over my head, and I would be dead before I could create a snowflake, let alone turn around and attack him. And the other soldiers probably knew that he'd kill me if they tried anything, despite having their weapons trained on him... Or were they just being faggots?

Realizing the latter was more likely, I dropped my head in defeat. Tears started to form in my eyes for the first time in over half a decade as I caught a glimpse of Fluttershy staring at me, crying silently.  
There was no way out of this. That was it, I was going to die... Shot in the back of the head by a rogue general, mainly due to my little burst of over-confidence, while attempting to defend Equestria... After having endangered it myself in the first place.  
So much for glory...

I waited. For what felt like an eternity, I waited. I had no idea what was going to happen. My heart was beating loudly in my chest, sweat was dripping down my face and I was reminiscing about the good things that happened to me, and thinking about everything that I actually wanted to live for. Which was a lot more than I used to think, actually.  
Tears were now flowing freely, coating my face and shirt in a salty mix of fear and sadness.

Was that really it? Was I going to die? Was it really going to end like that, right now? For nothing...  
Was I really going to stand and watch as Kevin discreetly kneeled down near Fluttershy? Was I seriously going to watch him whisper something in her ear, making her eyes light up in realization? Was I honestly going to witness her winking at me, before tossing the 40mm grenade at my feet, shortly after Kevin hit the deck and screamed 'GRENADE!'?

It all happened in a heartbeat.  
I felt the gun being withdrawn from my neck, and before I could fully turn around to see the general, or the dozens of humans, diving to the ground, deafening automatic gunfire rang into my ears. Instinctively, I shielded my face with my arms. I stayed like that for a few seconds, before coming back to my senses.  
Gazing at the ground, all I could see was a tall, lifeless body. A large part of his chest area was coated in red liquid, and riddled with bullet holes. I stood there for what felt like an eternity, until I finally managed to snap out of it, staring in disbelief at Fluttershy and my three 'partners', whose submachine guns were smoking.

They looked at each other and smiled.

"Wow, man! Holy shit, did we just..." Kevin was shaking.

Brian laughed. "I think we just did!"

"Yay!" Fluttershy squeed and flew up to me, wrapping her forehooves around my neck and hugging me. I fell on my ass as if I were drunk, not even bothering to resist the slight push her momentum had given me. Wrapping my own arms around her, I wiped my tears as well as hers, and gladly returned her hug, giving her a soft kiss on the lips while ruffling her mane. She blushed and hugged me tighter, burying her snout in my shoulder. I could hear some guys going 'd'aww' at the scene, and for the first time since I met her back on Earth, I was feeling good. Really good.  
Staring blankly at whatever was in front of me with a dumb smile plastered onto my face, nothing was really mattering to me anymore, other than the yellow pegasus in my arms, and the fact I was still alive.

"That grenade thing was pretty smart, if I must say so myself." Kevin chuckled.

"Pfft, you just got lucky he was caught in the heat of the moment, and didn't realize it wasn't a live grenade." Brian said, mockingly.

"Whatever man... I saved us, didn't I?"

"No you didn't!" I scowled at him, before turning back to Fluttershy, and smiling softly. "I'm so happy you asked me for that stupid grenade... You're the best, Flutty!"

"So I... I saved you? I can't believe I did!"

"Well, technically... Ah whatever, I guess you did." Kevin sighed. "Well, we did... All of us... Teamwork... right, guys?"

"Right."

"What the hay is happening in here?" a familiar female voice boomed. Her face softened upon seeing the dead body. "Oh my... What happened in here?"

"Ah, Chrysalis... Uh. I'm sorry, we had a... fight. We'll clean it up, don't worry."

"What happened?"

"The bad guy is dead, and Equestria is saved, I suppose."

She gave me an incredulous look.

"Yeah, I know... The villain's dead, everypony is safe and all, but well. As cliché as it sounds, in real life, it just feels right that way, you know?" I chuckled.

"Happy ending for me too, then?" she asked, lowering her head.

"What do you mean?"

"Do you... do you forgive me?"

I walked up to her and patted her head.

"Ah, hell... I guess I can forgive you. You helped us after all. Just, don't ever impersonate Fluttershy ever again, or anypony else for that matter. At least not without asking first... Okay?"

She gave me an uneasy smile. "You got it. So, um... what about that agreement of ours?"

"Agreement?"

"You said, if I helped you, you'd bring an end to our famine and make Changelings able to live among other creatures without being feared or anything... You said so. You did."

"I did? ...Uh, I mean, yeah I did. Well, uh... It will be up to Celestia, but I promise, I'm gonna make sure to tell her how much you helped." I was hoping she could hear the sarcasm in my voice, but apparently she didn't. "And I'll tell her that you saved one of the Elements." I said a bit more bitterly.

"Thank you... human. Can I... um..."

"Yeah? What?"

"You know..." she started fiddling with her hooves, her gaze never leaving the ground.

"C'mon Chrissy, just say it."

She looked at me, smiling awkwardly at her new nickname, and swallowed loudly.

"Can I... have a hug? Please?"

I grinned smugly. "Hm. Let's see."

I turned around and faced the numerous soldiers filling the room, most of them watching everything that had happened since half an hour like it were a movie or something, minus the popcorn.

"Say, guys... Any of you were bronies back then? Like, ten years ago or so?"

A good third of them raised hands.

"Wow, damn... Alright, good. Say, who is best queen?"

At least half of said third shouted in unison. "Chrysalis is best queen!"

The female Changeling's jaw dropped as she incredulously stared at the crowd of humans.

My grin got wider and I looked back at her. "Okay so, free hugs for Chrissy here. Who's in?"

About ten of them walked up to us, and I winked at her, this time smiling heartily.

"See? I think things are gonna work out for you... And you don't have to transform into anything, either. As bad as we humans can be, sometimes... Well, some other times, we truly know what's good. What's really good."

Before we could get swarmed by the other soldiers, I gave her a small hug, and Fluttershy joined us, soon followed by Brian and Kevin. Dave was still shifting uncomfortably, as he almost always was.

"Hey Dave, man, what's the matter?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Uh, like, don't take it wrong but, you know, I'm uh, like, scared of insects. You know?"

"Yeah? So am I. Actually... Ah whatever, screw it, suit yourself." I laughed, and went back to our collective hug.

After a few minutes, we all sat down as the recent events replayed in our minds. Eventually, we decided it was time to put an end to this 'war', and I stood up.

"Alright guys, listen up. I don't know if you guys are gonna stay here, or go back to Earth, or anything but, we need to go back to the castle. All the ponies and other creatures are probably scared and worried, and we need to go and explain them that all of this is over now. I guess whatever happens next is up to Princess Celestia, but we need to report to her, and the others. So we should get going... I'm not too sure how far the castle is from here, nor where it is, exactly. I, uh... I will get you there, though. Don't worry."

A good half of them stared incredulously, as Chrysalis looked at me, and smiled.

"I can teleport you there, if you want."

Putting a hand to my chin, I nodded.

"Why don't we all go there, actually? I mean, all of us. After all, you, your Changelings, the guys... We won. Together. We're like, war heroes. Or something."

She chuckled and scratched the back of her neck with a hoof.

"Yeah, you guys are definitely something... Alright, I'll show you the way. Hope you like walking." she smirked as she started to levitate using her magic.

I stared at her and giggled.

"Walking is too mainstream, eh?"

She giggled too and slowly levitated out of the room. "Yeah, so is flying."

"Alright guys, let's move. We're going home... Uh, no, I mean... Uh, maybe. Okay, you know what, just pretend I haven't said anything."

Sighing at how retarded I could be at times, I looked back as Fluttershy landed on my shoulder, and a good hundred soldiers were following us and chatting with each other. We walked out of the room, and eventually out of the hive, on our way back to Canterlot.

* * *

**_A/N: Yes I know, Chrysalis is somewhat OOC but then again, most of her 'personality' comes from the fandom, and I like to think that while she is powerful, scheming and evil, she is also vulnerable and actually in dire need of love, the latter being the reason why she's 'forced' to act the way she does._**  
**_TL;DR: I love her, and I can totally relate to the whole 'can't get love? fucking others' shit up is the next best thing' attitude she has going on._**


End file.
